8/6/2021
When I Am WeakAfter I gave birth to my second child, I began hemorrhaging. Those moments in time are so vivid to me and yet, they almost feel like a dream~The team of nurses rushing me down to surgery, a cold surgical room composed of nothing but steel, the anesthesiologist telling me to count backwards, and then waking up next to my husband.
Of all the things I remember, there is one memory that stands out the most to me. The absence of fear and the incredible, overwhelming peace that washed over me as my last thoughts were~ I am going to die and I am going to wake up with Jesus. Words cannot express the comfort I felt. It will last with me my lifetime. In that moment there wasn’t a single thing I could do to control that situation. My life was in the hands of God and in my weakness, He was my strength. It’s easy to talk about fear and having faith when you’re on the other side of it looking back. As the saying goes “Easier said than done”. We might think our faith is strong, but in a split second life can change. In times like those, we don’t have the chance to say- “hold on Crisis, let me get out my bible and notes and uplifting music so I can be in the right frame of mind”. Our dependence is totally and completely in the power of God. This is why meditating on His word every single day is so important. He promises that His promises will stay with us in those split second times of crisis. But what about the moments in our lives where time is not our friend? Where split seconds turn into weeks or even months? The moments that time allows us to get inside our head and become overwrought with worry and fear? The times we know we should be meditating on His words but we find ourselves constantly meditating on the problem instead? This is where I have been the last few days. The same child whose birth caused my faith to go into high gear in a matter of seconds is going through a trying time with her own unborn child. As a mother, it’s times like these that I have no idea how people can lean on their own strength instead of the power and strength of God. Because I would crumble. I readily admit that I am weak. Not only is it in a mother’s heart to worry and sometimes fear for our children, it’s in the heart of everyone who loves deeply. When we love deeply we will do anything to help the one we love. To take their pain away. To make everything okay again. To give them comfort and peace and joy. Even though time has been tempting me to worry and to fear, even though the nights have been long and my heart hurts for my child~ I know that there is not a single thing I can physically do to change the situation, just like the day that she was born. The only thing I can do is to cling to my faith in God’s promises and place all those worries and fears (over her worries and fears) into His hands. Because when we are weak, He is strong. 2 Corinthians 12:9-11 Because He loves us infinitely more than we could ever imagine. In fact, He loves my children infinitely more than I ever could. Isaiah 49:15, 66:13 So I will praise Him through all of this. I will praise Him because no matter what happens, I know of His steadfast love for me. I know of His steadfast love for my daughter and for my grandchild who has yet to be born. I know that His Mercy is new every morning and that He is forever faithful. Lamentations 3:22-23 And I know that He is in complete control. I am not~ But praise God because He is the I AM! Exodus 3:14, John 14:6, 15:5 Today I want to encourage you. What is your heart and mind meditating on? The problem or the promises? Are you worrying or worshipping? We need to come to grips with the fact that we are not in control and stop allowing fear and worry to control us by giving it our hearts and minds. Give it all to God. Believe me, I know it’s hard, but every time my mind starts meditating on anything besides His promises to me I know that I need to give it back to Him~ even if I have to repeat the process over and over again. Because I know in my heart that He is the only One Who controls the outcome and that outcome will be what’s best because it’s given from the One Who gave everything for me. John 3:16
6/19/2021
Are You Shocked?My husband received a precious piece of mail a few weeks back.
It was from our grandson Ethan. He has recently finished the second grade and one of his last assignments was posting a letter in the mail. My husband was tickled. As sweet as that letter was to him, we didn’t know the whole story… You see, the very day Ethan wrote that letter, sealed it and placed it in the mailbox is the very day my husband sent him a video telling him how proud he was of Ethan and all the great things he had planned for him that summer. They were the exact things Ethan asked about in his letter, a letter my husband had not received yet, much less read. When my daughter told me this story I immediately thought of my Heavenly Father, and I couldn’t help thinking about Father’s Day and how important the role of a daddy is. Daddies, and even their daddies create imprints of their Heavenly Father on their children and grandchildren’s hearts. Someday they might base their trust, protection, comfort, and most important~ love ~ on how they received it from their earthly father. That’s pretty huge. They will look at approaching God in the same way they could go to their daddy when they were little. It should be in awe, but never fear. How a daddy acts and reacts is a continual lesson in their little hearts to how they will one day believe God will act or react to them. And so, I read Ethan’s letter again. The sweet things he asked of his Bapa were answered before they were ever asked. What a beautiful picture of our Father. Whether you had a good relationship with your father or maybe never even knew your father, whether you felt like you could go to your dad about anything or you couldn’t ever talk to your dad, whether you felt comfort in his presence or disappointment, whether you ever felt loved at all… God your Father wants you to understand that He is and always will be all of these things for you. And so dear daughters, this Father’s Day there are four things I want you to remember. Four things I want imprinted on your heart. Four things to hold close and never forget. 1. God always wants to comfort and protect you. Isaiah 43:2, Psalm 91:1-2 2. God wants you to know you can always trust Him and depend on Him. Isaiah 26:3-4, Psalm 28:7 3. God wants you to talk to Him and tell Him the desires of your heart, understanding that He knows your thoughts before you do. He knows your requests and wants to answer before you’ve even asked. Psalm 139:1-6, 17, I John 5:14, Luke 11:13, John 14:13-14 4. God loves you. He loves you. Your Father loves you. I John 3:1, 4:16, Jeremiah 31:3, Zephaniah 3:17, Ephesians 3:19 I wish I could have seen Ethan’s face when he received my husband’s video message. I can picture his smile. I wish I could’ve seen my daughters face too. They were both in shock. My daughter said she even questioned how he could’ve answered Ethan’s letter when they had only just put it in the mailbox. Yes, God couldn’t have given me a better illustration of His heart for us. He knows. He answers. He loves. Once you grasp that, His love will never be something that surprises or shocks you. Instead, His love will continually make you smile and say~ “That was all God…MY Father.”
6/12/2021
Moments and MemoriesMoments that make up memories.
I realized yesterday that I use that phrase quite often when I write. The importance of those words is very weighty to me. There is nothing in this world that can take away, erase or change your memories. They are with you for the rest of your life. Like a feature film only you can see and play, as often as you would like. Most of the time we don’t get to choose the scenarios, they come upon us unawares as our days progress into each other. Day by day, moment by moment we live our lives, all the while turning those moments into memories. When my dad was still alive, memories of my childhood were precious, but I never fully understood their importance. Maybe because he was still with me and so, a part of me still felt like a child. I had him, I had my memories and I had pieces of my childhood all around me whenever I sat and visited with him. (which was almost a daily occurrence). It felt safe. It felt like home. And then~just like that, all of it was gone and I felt utterly abandoned and alone. I felt as if those memories were a life line I was grasping at and trying to hold on to~ because I no longer had them in the physical things I could see and touch. Dishes and utensils, pots and pans, china and silver~all the things I remember my mom using in my childhood were all priced, packed and put aside to sell. Furniture that I had dusted week after week from the time I started grade school was sold. Pictures were put in boxes and a home filled with my childhood seemed to be erased. I realize that this is something every one of us must face at some point in our lives. I will admit, I’m overly sentimental and probably wear my heart on my sleeve way too often. I almost couldn’t bare to do it. I almost couldn’t bare to part with one thing that my parents had cherished because every single thing, right down to the forks and spoons were part of a childhood that meant the world to me. I am so sentimental that I took pictures of every thing before packing it all up, every drawer and cupboard, every display on every shelf of every room. I even took pictures of my dad’s junk drawer. He was so organized and had everything so neat and tidy and it tickled my heart to see it. I didn’t care if I looked foolish for taking pictures of it all and I didn’t care if the tears fell. And they fell and they fell. And then it was all over and gone and all I had left was the memory of it all. I realized that I was the only one that possessed my unique and exact memories with my parents~ because they were both gone now too. And that’s when the importance of moments and memories hit me. But~ I realized in that moment that I was still making memories. My memories did not end with my parents. They will continue as long as I am alive. I can be a part of the memories in the hearts of my own children. Memories in the hearts of my grandchildren, memories in the heart of my husband, memories in the hearts of my family and my church family~ and my own heart felt such a stirring to remind you all of how important the memories we create from the moments we share are. Because memories are something that will always, always live on in our hearts until the day we die. We might move from house to house. Through the years we most likely will change our decor or our vehicle or our appliances, we might make new friends as the years pass, we might watch our children and grandchildren as they grow and move away and begin lives of their own, we may look lovingly at our spouse and their now wrinkled smile and gray hair, and we might even lose those we love dearly~ but we will never, ever lose our memories. The key to the beauty of it all is in the moments that make up those memories. We put so much importance on the things we can see and touch and possess. Things we think we can’t live without. Projects that have to be finished, jobs that must be done. Houses and cars and furniture and clothes and things we think will make us, or even our children happy. Things we think we are supposed to have. The American dream. But all the while we somehow forget that we can’t take any of it with us when we die. It will all be left behind for someone to sort through, to cry over and to make the hard decisions to sell. And then all that is left behind are the memories we have made in the moments we lived. Yes, I was sad to see my parent’s “things” go, but not because of the monetary value they held. I was sad because of the precious memories that made them so valuable. There is nothing wrong with making a wonderful life and home for yourself and your children. That’s exactly what my parents did for me, but don’t ever allow the making of that life to overshadow the moments with your children that create memories they will always cherish. What are you making of your moments? Every single second you live is a moment and a memory in the making. The words you say to those you love. The hugs and the kisses and the laughter and the magic. The snuggles and the reminiscing and the tenderness. The togetherness. That is what make up the moments that create beautiful memories. One day your child will no longer have you. They most likely will not have their childhood home or any of the things that fill that home. Things you think are so important. But they will always have their memories. Unique only to them. A precious gift that only you can give them by choosing today to make every moment count. To make every moment meaningful. To make a lifetime of every day normalcy into a fairytale of beautiful memories. I am a grandma, and yet I can remember my childhood like it was yesterday. Your children will too. Give those you love that beauty to remember. I will always cherish mine because it’s in that beauty of those memories that our loved ones live on forever.
6/5/2021
I Want To Go BackSome days I want to go back.
Back to when I was tiny and didn’t know about life. When I watched the love my mom poured into being a wife and mother, cooking and cleaning with pure contentment. When she would read to me or hold me when I was crying. When I believed everything would be okay, simply because she told me it would. When I had no cares except for what dress my baby dolls would wear or what flavor ice cream I would choose. A childhood filled with magic and make believe. A childhood filled with extraordinarily beautiful moments. Back to the days when mom made everything cozy and safe. I wish my younger little me could’ve understood how incredibly important those moments were. I wish I could’ve held on to them longer. Some days I wish I could go back to that first look. That first kiss. When the innocence of romance was far from reality. When there were no bills and no quarrels. When my world revolved around him and the love we shared. When he was the only person my eyes could see in a room full of people. When my heart would flutter with each smile and nothing mattered except him. When I put his needs before my own without a second thought. When the weight of life and the heartaches to come were non existent. When I thought that spark and excitement would last forever. Some days I wish I could go back to when they were little. When mommy was their world. When they thought she was the best and the smartest and had all the answers. When she could fix every problem and heal every boo~boo. When mommy was who they turned to when hearts were breaking or secrets were shared. When I watched them as they slept and felt my heart might burst for love of them. When they were safe in my care, under our roof. When I thought they would think of me this way for always and no matter how many years might pass, they would forever be my babies. Some days I wish I could go back to that day. Turning the corner and catching my daddy deep in thought. So deep he didn’t notice I was standing there. I wish I would’ve asked what he was thinking about more often. I wish I asked more questions about his childhood or what it was like raising my brothers and me. I wish I had asked what made him buy a farm and a horse or move back to a subdivision. I wish I had asked questions that might not have been important at the time but answers that would be so precious to me now. I wish I had asked how he was able to live again after mom passed because this is the toughest thing I’ve gone through. Living without them. Perhaps all those things are exactly what he was so deep in thought about. Perhaps he was wishing he could go back to when life was simpler and happiness came in bundles. Happiness we took for granted. Why is it that we don’t realize how important moments that make up our memories truly are until they are only memories? Memories that we can only visit in our hearts. Moments that we beg our children not to take for granted. Moments we want them to learn from now instead of later. How badly I wish I could go back to those moments in time and hold on to them and truly understand and cherish the beauty of each one. Never taking a single one for granted. Always thankful. Always being present. Always loving with my everything. Spending more time in those moments instead of in my head where the to~do’s and tomorrow’s came to visit too often. We can’t go back. But I can love like my mama on my grandchildren. I can make my home a place where they will always feel safe and cozy. I can’t go back to that first kiss but I can remember and recreate. I can choose to be selfless in my love for him and dwell on all the unbelievable goodness our marriage has held, and all the joy we have yet to look forward to. I can’t go back but I can always be that mom who points them to the answers in God’s word, who prays for them when their heart is breaking, who comforts them when secrets are shared. I can be that mom who tells them don’t take one second of your beautiful life for granted. I can be that mom that knows that no matter their age or where they might be, they are safe because God is holding them when I cannot. I can’t go back but I can look forward to the incredible joy I will one day encounter when I enter heaven’s glory and get to hug my Savior. When I get to let go of all the sadness, heaviness and grief as He holds me there. When I get to say thank you for all eternity, and it still won’t seem like enough because of all he’s done for me. When I get to see my loved ones that I have missed so deeply and know without a doubt how happy they are and have been and will forever be. And maybe that’s the lesson God has for us. To stop wishing on that past and start living for eternity. To look forward. To cherish more. To be present. To teach and to not take anything for granted and most importantly to look ahead to the home He has prepared for us. That beautiful home where our most cherished memories and moments will seem like nothing special at all compared to the glory we behold. That home. The home where happiness and joy will never cease and will always come in bundles.
5/15/2021
Your Head That Is BowedYesterday.
Her head was bowed. A worn and tattered bible lay softly on her lap. She read each word as if it were the greatest treasure she ever held. Her head was bowed. Bills lay all over the old kitchen table. A jar of loose change that came up short. Her words were barely audible as she spoke to her Savior. A smile was on her face. Full of assurance that He would take care. Heads were bowed all over the restaurant. Simple meals sat before them. Prayers of thanksgiving abounded for the goodness God had blessed them with. Laughter and conversation ensued. Joy was present. People were present. Heads were bowed as they knelt next to their bed. A tiny bedroom with only a small nightstand. Soft singing could be heard in praises to their Heavenly Father. A roof over their heads. A soft pillow to fall asleep on. Contended children in the bedroom next to them. Children whose little eyes captured each of these moments and remembered. “as sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; as poor, yet making many rich; as having nothing, yet possessing everything.” 2 Corinthians 6:10 Today. Her head was bowed. Scrolling mindlessly on a device filled with staged perfection. Unhappiness furrowed her brow, yet she could not avert her eyes. Psalm 107:8-9, 119:105 Her head was bowed. A device filled with objects sure to bring happiness, one of many credit cards in her hand. “Purchase now” was always such an easy option, yet happiness always alluded her. Philippians 4:19 Heads were bowed all over the restaurant. A fork in one hand and a phone in the other. A mindless murmur of conversation could be heard. No thankfulness. No laughter. People without presence. Proverbs 18:24 Their heads were bowed. Next to each other in bed, yet both in their own little worlds. Each looking at their device. Almost lost in the immense size of the bed they lay in, yet a bed that seemed small for the room that held it. Both still working late into the night. Worlds apart, yet in the same room. Promises to spend time with children had been broken. Again. Psalm 127:1-3 Children whose little eyes captured each of these moments and remembered. What will our children grow up remembering? As they see your head bowed will it be bowed to your Savior or to your device? Devices will always be around. They will become easier and faster. They will always pull us in. They will lie to us in making us believe that the grass is always greener. That other people’s lives are better. That it’s ok to go into debt because you deserve that new outfit, purse, shoes, furniture, vacation. That it doesn’t matter that you work 90% of your life to pay for what you deserve. To pay for happiness. That God is not in control and He will not help you, that only you can help yourself. That it’s okay to check those notifications, to scroll, to answer emails. That you are present with your husband, your children, your family because they are sitting next to you in the same room. Yes, your device is lying to you. I once read~ “Your cell phone will be small forever. Your children will not”. We only have our children for a short amount of time, and then they will be gone. Tomorrow. All your children’s tomorrow’s. What will they remember of your head that is bowed? Teach them to go to Jesus. Isaiah 54:13 Not their device. As a mother, one of the most comforting passages in scripture to me are the simple words of Jesus in John 2~
My hour is not yet come. In other words~ It’s not time yet, this wasn’t the plan. The magnitude of this speaks volumes to my mama heart because it shows the heart my Savior had for his own earthly mother. The God of the universe, the Christ who controls every aspect of time and space and knows every detail of our lives down to the second~ changed the very course of time for his mother. It wasn’t time for Him to reveal God’s plan to the world. It wasn’t time for Him to reveal Himself as the Messiah. It wasn’t His plan to perform His first miracle that day. Until that moment, He was simply a guest at a wedding. With the pleas of a mother, all of that changed in an instant. Not because she was a saint. Not because she had some power over Him that He could not refuse. Simply because she was his mama, a normal mama just like you and me. A mother. A miracle. A Messiah. His mother asked for help from the only One she knew could truly help. She needed a miracle. He did not hesitate. His heart for her was displayed in a single moment. Compassion, empathy, honor, love. And yes, that speaks volumes to me. Because I know that He knows. He understands. He has compassion and empathy and love. For me. Whatever I am facing as a mother, He will understand, and He will always be there to perform the miracles this mother needs in her own life. No matter what stage of motherhood you are in, Jesus will be with you through it all. ~When the pregnancy test comes back positive and suddenly, you are holding a precious newborn in your arms. ~When your once peaceful home becomes crazy and chaotic with toddlers and toys, diapers and bottles, giggles and laughter. ~When you fight back the tears on their first day of kindergarten and their last day of high school. ~When you smile for every “first” you get to experience, every proud moment, every minute spent together, every confidence shared. ~When you cry as they drive off to college or vow their life to another. ~When suddenly you are staring into the sweetness and wonder of your first grandchild, and it feels like it was just yesterday that you were holding their mama in your arms. As quickly as it starts, time will fly by even faster. With the best intentions, you might have the perfect plan laid out for your future, but the minute your baby is conceived is the minute everything changes. You become a mother. Through every “first” you can rest assured that He will be with you on your journey. Because He knows. He knows all about mamas and plans and change. He is with you through the uncertainty, the fear, the joy, the wonder, the stress, the tears, the loneliness, the pride, the amazement and the thankfulness. You are never alone mama. Your Savior has a heart for you. Even as Jesus was tortured and dying, He took care of His mother. I do not have one shadow of a doubt that He will do the same for me~ because it was for me that He was on that cross. Whatever you are facing, know that you can face it with Him. Not only the hard stuff, but the celebrations of motherhood as well. No one understands like He does. No one will have compassion and empathy for you as He does. No one will love you more on this journey of motherhood than He does. He knows. He understands. A mother. A miracle. Our Messiah.
5/1/2021
Stay At Home MomMy daughter recently shared a YouTube video entitled ‘Day in the Life’.
I smiled as I read all the sweet comments people posted, until I got to the very end. The last comment implied that her life as a stay at home mom was outdated and old fashioned. A slam against everything that she loves, and the calling she feels God has placed upon her heart. I thought back to earlier that evening. I had been babysitting my granddaughters. As I folded clothes in my laundry room, they laughed and played along side me, and in that moment my heart felt so incredibly full. Precious memories came flooding back of similar moments I shared with my children when they were that age. You see~I was living my dream. I am living my dream. All I ever wanted to be when I was little was a wife and mother. Sure I had hobbies and thought about vocations I might enjoy, but ultimately the dream was to be a wife and mom. Just like my mom. I never really knew how deep my passion was for such a dream until I was much older. Right in the middle of this mom life, despite all its craziness, I realized my dreams had come true. I cannot explain the peace that comes over me when I am home, doing home things. I’m in my element. Being a wife, a mom, a grandma. Cooking and cleaning and laundry and baking and taking care of this home God has given me and the hearts He has placed in my hands. Little hearts to mold and nourish and raise and love. And then to let go. There is nothing on this earth that I would rather do. But apparently, that is outdated. It’s old fashioned to think that way. It’s a ludicrous idea to some to actually love taking care of your home and the little hearts God has given you. And to me, that is sad. I raised three daughters and a son. They are all grown now and we’ve added 6 grandchildren to the mix. Two of my daughters have jobs outside the home and one has chosen to be that old fashioned vocation ~ A stay at home mom. I am immensely proud of all of them. Do I believe one is better than the other? Do I think it’s wrong to work outside the home? Let me be very, very clear here~ NO I do not, but I do believe it’s wrong when one of the greatest vocations since the beginning of time has been made into a mockery. What has become of us as a nation when being a stay at home mom has been belittled and looked down upon? Where mothers who choose that life are made to feel “less than” or stupid. Don’t get me wrong, I know there are women out there who abuse the system. Who don’t understand the true meaning of ‘wife’ and ‘mother’ and all that it entails. But to those moms who are living their dream with a passion~ it is a high calling. I am not ashamed to say that I am living my dream. In fact, I’m not ashamed to say that I love my husband, that I love making him his favorite meals or taking care of the home that his job has helped provide. Sadly, even marriage has been deprecated along with the homemaker. If you dare to say that you love cooking for your husband, or God forbid sharing intimacy together, instead of a helpmeet and lover, you are ridiculously labeled a ‘live in maid’ or even worse, a ‘sex slave’. Why do I find joy in these things that I do? Why do I believe I am living the dream? Because of the crazy amount of love my heart holds. Love for my God Who has provided me such a beautiful family and this dream home I have been given to live in and take care of. Love for my husband, who daily loves me back in so many different ways that too often I take them for granted. Love for my children, and the breathtaking wonder that these super, awesome adults were once cradled lovingly inside my womb. I’m living the dream because my heart is overflowing with thankfulness and love. Today I sat across from my three grandsons as they ate a piece of their mommy’s homemade carrot cake. The atmosphere might have appeared messy to some. School work was on the table, dishes were in the sink and all I could think was~ my daughter is living the dream too. What a dream. She’s raising boys who will grow up into men. Men who will have a part in leading our country into a better tomorrow. Maybe preachers or fire fighters. Maybe teachers or coaches. Men who will have an impact. Men who will become husbands and fathers. The kind of husbands you want for your little girls one day. The kind of fathers you want for your grandchildren. What a tremendous calling and privilege has been placed upon her heart. The raising of future husbands and fathers. I so often hear on social media the need we have for strong women. I cannot think of a stronger role model for generations to come than that of a stay at home mom. The time we have with the little lives entrusted to us is barely a whisper in the echo of eternity. But that whisper can become a mighty shout for God’s glory in the halls of their futures. Every single moment spent at home with them is an investment into that future. Please hear me Mama, your dream may not be the vocation of stay at home mom like mine is. That’s okay. There were several women in the Bible who worked outside the home. Maybe it is your dream to be a stay at home mom, but you don’t have the means to make it a reality. Regardless of what each of our situations may be, I think we can all agree that our children and grandchildren need a better future. I truly believe that future begins in the home, with the heart of a mother. Our focus needs to shift. It needs to change. The title Mom should never be downgraded. Instead, it should be applauded. It is a strong woman who has chosen such a job. A woman with some of the greatest strengths of all. The strength of thankfulness and of love. It isn’t a strength she possess on her own, it is a strength that can only come from an even greater love. That of her heavenly Father. As I was leaving my daughter’s home, her youngest hurt himself and came to me crying. I kissed his little finger and the boo boo magically went away. Someday he will be doing the same for his own children. Tears welled up in my eyes knowing I have had a small part in such a beautiful high calling. To be his mom’s mom. To be a stay at home mom. To think that God has allowed me this is beyond my wildest dreams~ and I get to live that dream every single day.
3/13/2021
Spring AheadI could hear them talking about their babies.
“I can’t wait until this child can feed herself. Sometimes it seems like my entire day consists of holding her and feeding her!”... “I can’t wait until this one is potty trained. Two kids in diapers is too much. It feels like it’s never ending.”... I can’t wait until mine can crawl, or better yet walk! I wish she was more self sufficient so I could actually get some things done.”... I looked over at my own children, now adults and remembered days like this. Days I wished I could spring ahead. But I also remembered~ I can’t wait until this child can feed herself... I wish she would let me cuddle with her like she did when she was a baby. I can’t wait until he’s potty trained... Look at him in the bathroom now, getting ready for his date. How can this be possible? I can’t wait for her to crawl and walk and be more self sufficient... Mom, I’m going out with my friends. I’m leaving for college. I’m moving out. I’m getting married... It isn’t never ending. There comes a day when it all ends. A day when you wish you could go back and hold them again. A day when you have all the time in the world to get things done. Suddenly their childhood is over as quickly as it arrived. Everything is new and different. Empty arms. Empty bathrooms. Empty homes. Sometimes lonely~like a long, cold winter. But then everything changes. Winter turns into Spring. Old thoughts become transformed. They turn into~ I can’t wait until this child can feed herself... Mom I made you and dad dinner. I’ll bring some over. I can’t wait until he’s potty trained... Son, can you train me to use all this technology and help me create a blog? I can’t wait for her to crawl and walk and become more self sufficient... She’s such an amazing mother. And she’s such an amazing daughter. She tells me how much she loves me and how thankful she is for the way we raised her. And she tells me that she now realizes all the sacrifices and all the love that went into everything her dad and I did for her growing up. Her sufficiency turns into gratitude. Winter has turned into Spring again. And just like leaves fall away from their home in the cold months of winter, each of my children left the home my husband and I built for them. But then there is a rebirth of all the beauty your heart and home once held, and what I once thought would be sadness has blossomed into joy again. I once read this quote~ ‘The earth laughs in flowers.’ That made me smile, despite looking outside at the dark and muddy barrenness winter holds over her. Because I know what’s coming. Don’t hold onto the long, dark winter months. Look for the incredible new blooms. Look for the rebirth of every single thing you sacrificed, everything you taught them and all the love and prayers you poured into them. Look for Spring, it is only just ahead and it’s incredibly beautiful.
3/6/2021
Fight For HappinessOld seemed so far away.
I was on vacation. Laying in the sand, soaking up the sun, listening to the waves. Getting browner by the minute, and loving every second of it. I took my young body for granted. Never worrying about what I ate or didn’t eat, never worried about joints aching or not being able to open jars. Never worried about wrinkles or skin cancer. Those thoughts never once entered my mind. Yes I took life for granted. And then I had a few kids, and pretty soon I realized these kids really, truly needed me. I loved them with an ache that could not be compared to anything I’d ever experienced. And suddenly, I was worried about skin cancer and what I ate or didn’t eat. As I lifted each child, as I hauled a baby around on my hip that supported a pregnant belly above it, I no longer took that body for granted. I lathered on sunscreen and wrinkle cream. I took vitamins and ate healthier. I spent more time in God’s word instead of magazines with beautiful models on their covers. I began to see things differently as each year went by. Pretty soon my arms and hands were lifting boxes as each child moved into their new homes. I was unpacking kitchen utensils and bathroom necessities for them. I was helping hang pictures and making up beds in their new bedrooms. Bedrooms that were no longer above me upstairs. And later in the evening I was rubbing medicinal cream on achey joints and back muscles. I was missing them. And I was remembering. I was remembering a young 20 year old basking in the sun. Unpacking boxes in her new apartment. Welcoming each child into her heart and home, and taking so much for granted. And I whispered thank you to Jesus. Because I never really realized all He gave me, and I took so much of it for granted. I determined that I no longer would. And I was watching my dad before he passed. How slowly he moved. How hard it was for him to see like he used to. How easily he tired. And yet, he still smiled. He still laughed. He still enjoyed life. And I felt young again. And I knew that every day would be a gift. Every day would hold beauty. Every day would be a day I would look back on with either happiness or sorrow, and every day I would fight for that happiness. And I would tell you~ don’t take it for granted. Cherish every single minute of every single day and thank Jesus for it, because it goes by so quickly. Thank God for your young self. Don’t take your body for granted. Thank God for that body and all it’s able to do. Thank God for His word and the wisdom it gives you each and every day. Thank God for your children and for achey joints and backs, because you were able to help them. Because they still needed you. Thank God that you miss them~ because He gave you so much beauty to miss. Thank God and don’t ever take another minute of another day of your beautiful life for granted again.
2/27/2021
Mama, It’s OkayMama, It’s Okay~
I looked over at her and my heart immediately felt empathy. She was flustered and embarrassed. We were on an airplane and here she sat trying to take care of two young children, alone. Her toddler seemed to be fine, but the baby in her arms would not stop crying. The worry on her face was visibly noticeable as she tried to soothe the baby’s cries and repeatedly apologized to the passengers next to her. I wanted to reach out and calm her anxious heart. I wanted to tell her it was okay. Flying was hard on infants. She shouldn’t worry about what anyone else thought, she should just take care of the tiny one in her arms. Another day. Dinner out when I noticed her. Sitting at a table with four young children. The older two were fighting over crayons and placemats. The baby was crying. The toddler had ketchup all over the front of him. She tried to control the situation, but her mama heart looked overwhelmed in the moment. Worry about the other customers was written all over her face. I could almost hear her whispering~why did I even try? I wanted to get up and walk over. I wanted to wipe the ketchup off her son and sing sweet lullabies to her baby. I wanted to tell her that no one else in that room mattered at the moment, except her children. Sunday services. A brand new mommy bringing her infant to church for the very first time. So many emotions going through her heart and mind. Just showing up was a chore. “Getting ready” for church held a whole new meaning. She was tired before she even arrived and even though the baby slept often during this time at home, she awoke with cries that rang through the auditorium. The mother’s heart fell. Her cheeks flushed and her countenance read panic as she picked her up and tried to shush her, eventually taking her out of the service. I wanted to get up and help her. I wanted to tell her it was okay. I wanted to comfort her heart with the knowledge that everyone understood. I am that mother. I am that mother on the plane, at the restaurant, in church. I wish I could go back and tell my younger self those things. The things that my older self now knows. I wish someone had told me those things. Anyone. Another mom. A grandma. Anyone. But I felt alone, embarrassed, worried, anxious. At times I felt like a bad mom who couldn’t control her children. The worry over what others thought outweighed the worry over my children at the time, and what they were going through. I wish I could go back and wipe away the tears and smile into the eyes of my crying baby and tell her it was okay, Mama was here. I wish I could’ve sung lullabies to them without caring what the passengers next to me thought. I wish I would’ve told myself that kids will fight, ketchup will be spilled. Babies will cry, and that all of that was normal. Not just normal, but okay. Mama. It’s okay. I’m here to tell you, It’s okay. Don’t you worry about a single thing. Don’t worry about what other people think. You are a beautiful, wonderful mama. Your children adore you. Shift your focus off of others and be in that moment with your children. That moment of childhood and all it entails. Don’t look back one day wishing you knew what I’m telling you now. Choose to believe it. It’s okay. One day you will be like me, looking over at your babies who are now all adults. Some with babies of their own. The memories of the chaos at restaurants and the crying in public places will only be a vapor in the overall picture of precious moments you had with them while they were still little. And you will wish that you had known it was okay. Stop and look at them mama. Wherever you are, whatever you are doing~ stop and look at them and tell your heart~ It’s okay. It’s better than okay. It’s beautiful and wonderful and magical~ even in the chaos and the crying. Don’t worry, and don’t wish for anything less. It’s okay.
1/30/2021
Broken ThingsI was having a really bad morning. You know, one of those days where everything goes wrong.
My granddaughter asked me for something from the refrigerator and when I walked into the kitchen, I just stopped. I had a moment. My shiny black fridge had swirls of deep scratches imbedded into it, almost as if someone had taken a fork to the entire surface. My granddaughter looked from me, and the apparent horror on my face, to the refrigerator. She pulled a tiny magnet off its surface and asked “did this make those scratches grandma?” Her big brown eyes were full of remorse and sadness. It immediately brought me back to a similar time when my son was about that age. We were living on a very small salary at the time and I was thrilled when I was able to find a ‘one of a kind’ antique at a price I could actually afford. The dealer apparently did not know what they had. Just a few short days later as my son was innocently playing, the antique got knocked to the floor and shattered. I vividly remember that I did not say a word. I went into my bedroom, shut the door and quietly cried. I didn’t want my son to hear me or think that I loved a stupid antique more than I loved him. It was after all just a “thing” and he didn’t do it on purpose, but my heart was broken. I knew it was an accident, but I also knew I couldn’t afford a piece like this and would probably never find one so cheap again. I felt so petty that day as I cried, and I felt petty as I stared at that refrigerator. The damage was irrevocable. All I could say to my granddaughter was “yes that magnet made those scratches.” I went upstairs because I didn’t want to cry in front of her, just like I did all those years before. As I prayed, a flood of memories washed over me. Memories of all the times I lost it with my kids when they were little. I might have cried quietly the time my son broke my antique, but far more often anger and yelling was usually my response. Drinks that spilled. Muddy footprints. Messy rooms. Stains on clothes. Stains on furniture. Broken dishes. Broken things. Sadly at the time I felt I had every right to be angry at them, even though the majority of the time they were innocent mistakes. I was just having a bad day. Just like today. As I look back at those moments, I realize how foolish I was for flipping out about things. Things. Spilled drinks, muddy footprints, stains and messy rooms can all be cleaned up. Things broken can be replaced. I have come to realize how quickly time has passed since those moments. All those things that had broken~ that I was so sure I’d never find again~ they have all been replaced twice over. They weren’t as important as I thought. And now, there are no spilled drinks or messy rooms or stains to clean up~ because my house is empty. My children are grown and gone. Mama, don’t lose it over the little things. Satan can use those little things, just like that little magnet on my refrigerator, to make you feel as if everything is ruined. It’s not. Tomorrow is a new day. They are children. There will always be messes, there will always be broken things~ until there’s not. One day you will look back and realize how silly it was to let those things ruin your day and cause you to lash out at them. Sometimes I think mamas get so bogged down with the overbearing weight of our day to day chaos that we forget they are only children. They’ve only been on this earth for 2 or 4 or even 8 years. Whatever their age, it’s not much at all to expect perfection from them. To expect them to never make mistakes. But we do without even realizing it. And then one day you are looking at a refrigerator with your granddaughter. A refrigerator that you know you can’t fix but you tell her that it’s okay, and you hug her tight because you know that one day you will look at that refrigerator and remember. You will remember that moment and her little hands, and you will miss it. And you will be forever thankful that God allowed your heart to realize how special that moment was. Moments with your grandchildren. Time will go by so quickly. The feet that once were little will walk out that door for good. Don’t wait until your home is empty and your children are grown and gone to realize that the most important things in your home were never really the things at all. They were those little feet and hands. The little feet and hands that broke the things. The little feet and hands that made the messes. The little feet and hands that will one day be only moments of beautiful memories.
1/23/2021
Small Frames Hold Big LoveBig magic in the mundane, the big picture in a small frame, everything is sacred when you take time to notice, big love happens in the small moments.... Can I just be honest here? Sometimes my adult kids really frustrate me. When the frustration hits, it’s usually due to worry. Am I allowed to say that as a pastor’s wife? Most of my kids read my blog posts. Not sure how that will go 🤣, but if they’re honest, they’re kids or spouses frustrate them now and then too. I know I’ve said it before, but you mamas who think it’s so hard with little ones... Just wait. When they’re little it seems like their hearts are bursting with unconditional love for you, plus~ you get to tell them what to do. 😂 Sure, they might not obey every time, but when they’re really little, it’s SO much easier to teach them why your words of wisdom are so important. And when they’re really little, they usually listen. I tend to let the “not listening” part of adult children really get to me. Often my feelings get hurt and I feel unloved when I don’t understand the direction they’re going, and it seems like they’re disregarding me as a parent and the things we taught them when they were little. But then God gives me mama moments. Moments filled with comfort. They might not be living under my roof anymore or doing things the way that I taught them, but if I’m truly praying for them, if I’m truly leaving my children in the hands of God and trusting Him, then I should not be worried at all. And He always ends up showing me just how loved I am. This past Christmas was one of those mama moments. The kids gave us a video they put together of pictures of our grandchildren set to music. Ten years earlier they gave us a similar video, but it was full of pictures from their own childhood-My husband watches that video all the time, and every single time he gets teary eyed. So, we all jammed into my tiny 10’ x 12’ TV room to watch the new video. Some were standing, grandkids were on laps and the room felt like chaos. But when the video started, magic happened~ silence filled the room as everyone watched. As I watched. I watched the video, but I also watched my adult children and their spouses. Every single one of them was wiping away tears as eyes were glued to the screen. They weren’t tears of sadness. They were tears filled with love. The love their hearts were feeling. And man, my heart was full. So much love filled that room. God was in that room. This was a big moment in a small frame and I don’t think any of them probably realized that at the time. But I did. And God told my fretful, worrying mama heart that I was too often trying to hold on to this big picture and freaking out about what I thought life for my adult children was supposed to look like, when all the while He was giving me small frames to hold onto every single day in the mundane. Beautiful pictures inside those frames to show me how truly wonderful life with my adult children was. I was trying to control what was inside that big picture instead of realizing that He is the only One who can. I was doing the same thing to God that I thought my adult children were doing to me. I wasn’t listening to what He had been teaching me all along, but instead I was doubting His love and goodness. I was doubting that He would take care of them. That big moment in a small frame will forever be etched in my heart and I will look more often for those small frames that my life holds. Small frames God gives me every single day. So moms of adult children, don’t fret, don’t worry, don’t let your heart hurt. Don’t feel unloved. I know it’s hard. I’ll probably never stop parenting or wanting them to listen to my advice, but if we’ve been praying for our children, if we’ve truly given them to God, then we can’t let the frustration and worry control us. Allow Him to hold your big picture. We might not ever see the finished portrait here on earth, but we can rest in the fact that our Heavenly Father is still perfecting every stroke. One day when we take our last breath and stand face to face with our Savior, He will show us that beautiful picture and it will be so much more glorious than we could have ever imagined. Until then, enjoy all the beautiful small frames He hangs on the walls of your heart every single day~and trust Him. Because those small frames hold big love.
12/30/2020
Dear Mom, You Can’t But God CanWhen my children were little, each night I would go upstairs to check on them before going to sleep myself. Seeing them nestled peacefully~all snug in their beds, made my heart feel so incredibly full. Every Christmas I wanted to make all their Christmas wishes come true. Perhaps it was my heart’s way of trying to show them a picture of the incredible love their Heavenly Father had for them. After checking on them, I’d quietly tiptoe back downstairs and I would always stop at the window in our stairwell to check for snow. Snow was always on their wish list for Christmas, something I knew would truly bring them joy, but something I could never provide. Every single night I would stop at that window and look out at my quiet town below. Wishing for snow. Tonight I stopped at that same window and all those memories came flooding back. My heart wished for snow for my children. My grown up adult children who still get excited when beautiful white snowflakes appear in the sky. My adult kids who still text me to tell me it’s snowing outside. I know many of you think I’m crazy. Many of you hate the snow, but you have to admit~ there’s something breathtakingly beautiful about a world covered in white at Christmas time. Especially this year. Maybe this year my heart longs for that blanket of white because our world has been so dark. Maybe for a moment I want my kids to be free from the cares of this world and once again feel like little children. As easy as it seemed to provide happiness for them when they were little, it is almost near impossible when they are adults, and that’s hard. Life is hard. 2020 was hard. But tonight as I sat in our stairwell, looking down at our little town, wishing for snow and pondering all these things, God whispered to my heart~ “Just like you couldn’t provide snow when they were little, you can’t provide snow for your children now Charisse. You can’t take the cares of this world away. You can’t lift the heavy burdens off their hearts. You can’t provide true joy”~ “But I can.” My heart knew that all those Christmases we didn’t have a single snowflake, it didn’t matter. My children never doubted my love for them. They knew they were loved. They knew they would be taken care of. And that’s exactly what I want them to know when they’re adults. As Christmas Day approaches and a new year is on the horizon, I want them to believe like little children again. I want them to trust that they are loved and that God will take care of them. That has been God’s message all along. The message of Christmas. He sent His Son to a little town in Bethlehem to show us His love. To show us He will always take care of us. To wash our hearts whiter than snow. My heart is filled with peace as I look out that window at my own little town and remember. I know my God will take care of my children no matter what the year ahead holds. Joy floods my soul as I think about how much He loves each of them. I don’t have to worry about a thing. He will provide. And as I smile in the darkness~ beautiful, white snowflakes begin to fall.
11/24/2020
You Are Creating MemoriesI looked at their tiny faces. Excitement was in their eyes.
The glow of the fireplace filled the room and candles were our only light. Our power was lost due to high winds. It was an inconvenience to many, but to these little boys~an exciting adventure. They got to pack up and go to grandmas. They got to sit in the dark with flashlights and candles and soak up the warmth of the fire. And without even realizing it, we were making memories for them. Memories of eating grandma’s treats in the dark and playing with Bapa’s head light. Memories of toys and pillows all over the floor. Memories of the lighthearted laughter of aunt Jessica, grandma and mommy. Memories of Christmas music playing in the background and the smell of yummy candles in every room. Memories of their firefighter daddy and Bapa safely coming in from a fire call, and the joy that they were finally home. Memories of tickles and snuggles. Memories of the sound of howling winds yet the cozy comfort of being inside with those they loved. Memories of turning a bad situation into a beautiful one they will never forget. And we didn’t even realize. Sweet mama, make those memories for your children. Their little hearts hold on and they remember. We have opportunities in front of us to fill those little hearts with beautiful memories of the holiday seasons approaching. They will remember the year they might not get to go to grandmas for Thanksgiving or be with their cousins on Christmas Day. We have the power to make those days beautiful for them. Our adult minds understand what’s going on in our world right now. It’s scary and sad and difficult to wear a smile with so much hardship going on around us~ but we can. We must. For our children. Amidst the howling winds of fear and anger and the sickness and sadness that’s going on outside, we might feel like we have lost power, but we haven’t. Our children believe we can do anything. We have the power to make them feel cozy and safe within our homes, within our arms. We have the power to continually show them the joy that only Jesus can give. We have the power to fill their hearts with beauty and with memories that will last the rest of their lives. One day my grandsons will look back and laugh and say “remember the time we lost power and got to go to grandmas?” And even though they will be adults, it will make their grown up hearts feel like kids again~ and they will smile. Those are the memories I want to leave with my grandchildren. I want to leave as many good memories as I can in their tiny hearts~ no matter what is going on in our world right now. I don’t want to fill those precious hearts with fear and anxiety or sadness. I want them to be filled with joy. This is their childhood and they will only be children once. Every single day is a new memory. They’re watching and listening. Too often I think we forget that. Pay attention to your words and your emotions. Pay attention to your reactions and responses. Purpose in your heart to have a life filled with the joy and peace of Jesus no matter what the circumstances around you are like. Because good or bad~ without even realizing~ you are the one creating memories for your children~ Make sure they’re beautiful. Psalms 16:8,9, 11 2 Timothy1:7 Acts 1:8a John16:33 Ephesians 3:20, 6:10 Romans 15:13 2 Samuel 22:33 Isaiah 40:29 Colossians 1:11
10/5/2020
How Is Your Childhood?On a scale of 1-10, how would you rate your childhood?
Do you ever have adult days where you wish you were a child again? When sadness, stress and anxiety weigh heavy on your heart? Days when you remember crying in your mother’s arms, and those beautiful arms making everything okay? Being free from the pressure of responsibilities, deadlines and schedules? Not worried about being sick, because mom always took care of you and made you feel better? To just feel that cozy comfort of home? The comfort of being a carefree child again? I do. The other night my husband and I were watching a game show and the question was asked~”how would you rate your childhood?” Mike looked over at me and asked that same question. I didn’t even have to pause. My answer was 10. My childhood was not free from problems and heartache, but no matter what we went through as a family, I knew that I was deeply loved and cared for. My childhood was magical and wonderful and beautiful. My parents made sure of that. It got me thinking of another conversation I had recently with my daughter in law. She was telling a story about her own childhood. A precious memory of her mother that she had. Her eyes twinkled through tears as she spoke~ ...We sat on the couch. I was snuggled in close to my mom as she read to us about Jesus. It was only my little sister and I, but my mom did this every single day. And then we would sing. I watched my little sister dance around the living room, pretending to fly as we sang “Mount Up With Wings As Eagles”. She was laughing and singing and flying, and I was smiling. My childhood heart had no idea that someday this would be such a beautiful memory for me.... Oh mama, there is nothing more important in this world than making your child feel that way. To give them the gift of time. To snuggle in close with them. No phones, no TV, no distractions. Just you and your child and Jesus. The gift of making them feel that magic and wonder, beauty and comfort and love. The gift of them knowing that no matter what, your beautiful arms will make everything ok. There is nothing more precious than teaching them about Jesus, than laughing and flying with them in your living room as you sing about your Savior, than making sure they know that no matter what~ they are deeply loved and cared for. Oh daughter, there is nothing more important in this world than knowing that you are your Father’s child. He holds eternity in His hands, and yet has all the time in the world for you. You are never alone. He is always present. Make the time to snuggle in with Him. No phones, no TV, no distractions. Just you and Jesus. His word will show you the wonder, beauty and comfort of His love. He will give you the gift of knowing that no matter what, His beautiful arms will always make everything ok. He wants you to know that you are deeply loved and cared for. One day when you enter Heaven’s glory, what if Jesus were to ask you~ How was your childhood daughter? Did you know that I sat there next to you on your couch as you cried? Did you know My words of comfort were always available to you? Did you realize that you could have been free from the heavy weight of your sadness and stress, responsibilities and deadlines, if you had only placed them into My hands? I was there through the sickness and pressures of life. I never left your side. You were never alone. Through every problem, through every heartache, you were deeply loved and cared for. How would we answer our loving Savior? Our Father and Friend? Our Protector and Provider? Oh sister, we don’t have to wish we were children again because we are children. We are God’s children. Snuggle in close and read about the One Who holds you in His arms. Laugh with Him. Sing with Him. Mount up with wings like eagles. Run without getting weary. Walk without fainting. Wait on Him. He will renew your strength. He will make everything okay. Yes, snuggle in. Smile and feel that childlike wonder, magic and beauty all over again. How is your childhood dear mother, dear sister, dear daughter of God? Close your eyes and remember. Remember what it felt like to be a child, then let your Savior pick you up and take you back. Feel the cozy comfort of home. The comfort of His love. The comfort of being a child again. Isaiah 40:31 This room.
When we moved into this house 26 years ago, this room was an office. We changed it into a tiny family room with a comfy couch. I have such sweet memories of all of us piling onto that couch in that tiny room full of love. Homemade popcorn and Friday night movie night. I sat on that couch every morning praying for my children and reading God’s word. Years passed. Decorations changed. Children grew up and moved out, then moved back in. The tiny room became a bedroom for our daughter, an apartment for our nephew and now, once again an office. And here I sit. I can hear the crickets chirping outside the window. It’s a reminder to me of the stillness of this moment 26 years later. All those memories that seem like yesterday. All the memories this tiny room holds. Here I sit praying for my children, their spouses and my grandchildren. I think back on those years. All the hurry. All the rushing from activity to activity. All the worry of what I thought was so important to me at the time. Here I sit in the quiet of this room with the whispers of memories rushing past. I wish I had stopped more often and really, truly understood what was the most important. Time with my little family. Stopping to listen to little voices telling me stories of their days. Really listening and hearing them. Not allowing my mind to wander as they talked. Thinking about what I would make for dinner or where I would have to be or what I would have to do later that day or that week or that month. Just stopping in the moment and soaking it in. Because that exact moment would never come again. Today my days seem to all be the same. What was my life? It was a vapor, but I didn’t realize it when I was younger. And now today turns into tomorrow and yet it continually feels the same. And I see those little faces in this room talking to me and giggling and I remember my mind trying to heed the advice of the older women before me. “Enjoy it because it goes by so fast”. And yet my mind was a million miles away to my list of things I thought had to be done. What do your days hold? What is the purpose of your life? Is your life a fulfillment of the dreams you had when you were younger? Is this what you wanted your life to look like? Do you have joy in your moments? Are you happy? What is the end goal of each day? Of the minutes that turn into hours and days and years? What is the purpose of your life? What are you doing today that your tomorrows will be thankful for? Will you be thankful for your job? Your home? Cleaning and running from task to task with no time to breathe? Late night meetings, early morning alarms, emails and texts and notifications, just to start all over again? Mindlessly making dinner and doing laundry and dishes and baths and prayers and bedtime, but never truly being present? Picking up toys and collapsing into bed just to begin all over again? Why? Why? So often in our younger years our focus is on the future. That job that will make more money. That diet and exercise program that will make us healthier and happier. That furniture we’ve always wanted. That perfect home we’ve always dreamt of. We have no guarantee we will see tomorrow and yet our generation has become so focused on our tomorrows that we forget about all the beauty in each moment of today. If we don’t have time to focus on our Savior, if we are too busy to truly be present for our children, if we are too tired to enjoy time with our spouse every evening~ then our lives need to change. Our priorities need to change, because nothing in this world is more important than your Savior and your family. What will your children remember about today? One day as you sit in your family room when they are grown and gone and look back on today, is this what you want your today to look like for your children? For your family? Is this what you want them to remember? Will you remember being present. Really present? Is that what they will remember? And so I ask again. What are you doing today that your tomorrows will be thankful for? Because today will never come again. I encourage you, as a mom who is now living in those tomorrows and a grandma who now realizes how important her todays are~ stop and be still and watch and listen and smile and breathe and find beauty and joy and laughter. Dance and sing, listen and hug. Tickle and giggle. Hold them and rock them. Love them with your everything. Love them with your everything. You do not have to continue on the path you have made. Be fearless in your Father and change the direction your path is going. The path of all your beautiful tomorrows starts with each beautiful moment today. Hey Moms, you’ve been on my heart a lot lately.
Especially moms of little ones. A few months back when our lives were suddenly turned upside down and parents were forced to stay at home with their kids, I began seeing posts from mothers that really surprised and sometimes saddened me. To be honest some of them made me wonder why some women became a mom to begin with. Staying at home with their kids was driving them crazy. Please don’t get the wrong idea, I understand crazy. My own kids have driven me to that point many times (and sometimes still do.😂) I’m not trying to portray myself as some super mom. I can’t even tell you the amount of times I lost it with my own kids (just ask them), and as I look back I can say without a doubt that ‘feeling sorry for myself’ had a big role in some of those moments. Being a mom is hard work. I understand that. It’s stressful and overwhelming and exhausting, and moms everywhere need breaks and some “me time”. We have to be so careful though. When we start to look inward and listen to those thoughts that continually whisper to our tired souls~”what about me?” Pretty soon those thoughts aren’t whispering. They’re screaming. And thats when the crazy hits us. With that being said, I would like to encourage you on how to get your sanity back. I could probably write a book on all the things I wish I had done differently as a mom. Today will be some basics. Let’s say page 1 of chapter 1. 😂 I’ll warn you right now, it’s going to take some work~mentally and physically~and I know what all you exhausted moms out there are thinking~ I don’t want to work at anything right now!!! I want a maid and a cook and a babysitter and twelve straight hours of sleep. And some chocolate. No tantrums, no dirty diapers, no potty training, no children in bed with me, no laundry surrounding me on my couch or dirty dishes in my sink. No sticky fingers and faces and toilet seats. No work~PLEASE. And that my sweet mamas is what takes me directly to point number 1~ 1. Go to God and ask for help. Right now. Stop reading and ask Him to help you. I’m serious. Just put your phone down and plead to Him for help. Whether you feel like you’re doing fine with this mothering thing or whether you’re in the middle of the chaotic crazy. Stop and ask. If you don’t do this, the rest of this post won’t help you at all. We as moms have to realize we cannot do this mom thing without God’s help. Whether you’re pregnant right now, have a newborn, toddlers, teenagers or college students~ or even if you are a grandma~ you never “arrive”. You need God’s help and guidance every step of this motherhood journey, until you step into Heaven. 2. With that being said, my second tip would be prayer and time with God. I’ve written a lot of posts on prayer and if you go to my blog and type prayer in the search bar, I’m sure you will find many. I know how hard it is to find the time to pray when you’re a mom of little ones, but sometimes I think we look at prayer completely wrong. We think that we have to have this “holy time” set aside; alone in our rooms, kneeling by our bed, devoting complete attention to God. When you’re a mother of little ones, you know that won’t ever be a reality. So, here’s what I want you to think about. Do you love your children? Of course you do. When they come to you, do you tell them they have to make an appointment to talk to you so that you can devote your entire attention to them? Of course not. Your children come to you ALL DAY LONG. You answer their questions, you provide comfort and nourishment. You provide love. That’s how it’s meant to be with God. Moms need to realize that God is right there with them ALL DAY LONG. You can go to Him anytime and He will listen. He will help you with your questions, He will comfort and nourish your soul. He will love. Not only should you ask God to help you, but it is never too early to begin praying for your children. From the time the THOUGHT of starting a family enters your head, it should be bathed in prayer. It doesn’t matter how old they are, never stop praying for your kids or asking God for help in raising them! We cannot do it in our own strength because many times moms of little ones have no strength left to give. We have to rely on God. He is the one Who will give us the energy to be the moms we need to be for our children. 3. Next, I want you to switch your focus off of yourself. When your little ones don’t give you a moment’s peace. When you hide in the bathroom and tiny hands are knocking and little voices are shouting “mommy, mommy, mommy”. When your newborn is crying all night long~ when all of these things overwhelm you and your exhausted mind starts screaming~”what about me?” I want you to think about the thoughts that are running through your mind at that moment and then think to yourself~ what if my Savior had these same thoughts about me? When I’m asking Him to help me ALL DAY LONG. When I’m sometimes shouting “Father, Father, Father” because I just can’t do it alone. When I can’t sleep at night and I’m crying out to Him. He always, always, always gives grace. Give your children some grace. Don’t feel sorry for yourself and snap at them. They are children. They aren’t adults. They don’t understand hard mommy days, they don’t understand mommy and daddy fights, they don’t understand when you’re bent over the toilet with morning sickness and they’re hanging on your neck telling you that they love you (Jessica 😊). They don’t understand the stress of a pandemic or worry over their futures. They don’t understand. All they know is that you are mommy and YOU ARE LOVE and that’s what they need. Show them grace. Show them love. Just like your Heavenly Father does for you. 4. With that out of the way, now I DO want you to focus on yourself haha. Show YOURSELF a little grace. Every mom needs a little “Me time” for her own sanity. Whether you leave for a half hour to take a walk or a ride, whether that looks like grocery shopping for you or a hot bath, whether it’s time alone with friends or time with your husband, or time just sitting in your car alone in the driveway. You need TIME, but not before God time. Stay in God’s word and pray. This goes back to point number 2. If you don’t ask God for help and find little snippets of time to be with Him, your “me time” won’t make one bit of difference. You will return home to the chaos and crazy, and immediately lose it all over again. Remember to not only talk to God all throughout your day but also remember His promises to you. Promises from His word. It’s hard to find that time with God to actually read the Bible when you have little ones getting up at the crack of dawn, on top of a newborn that spent the whole night crying. The exhaustion is just overwhelming and your eyes can’t even focus on your coffee cup, let alone God’s word. Something that has always helped me is to find promises from God’s word, write them or print them out and place them strategically around your home. They will be constant reminders of God’s love for you. Put them above your kitchen sink, on your fridge, next to the changing table or toilet (your escape ie~”mommy is going potty, go away) or on your mirror to remind you first thing in the morning. Doing this will uplift your soul and encourage you no matter how tired you are. If you put this into practice and then you take some “me time” you will return home refreshed with a new outlook and more patience and grace for your little ones (and for your husband). By talking to God and staying in His word, His love will continually fill all the tired, empty spots and push aside all that crazy. When you return home from time away, you will be able to pour that love right back into your family, no matter what you return home to. Sticky kisses and toilet seats included. God understands that we are only human. Don’t ever allow yourself to feel guilty for taking some time for yourself. It will make you a better mommy to those little ones and a better wife to your husband. Like I said, these are only some brief points on motherhood and those beginning crazy years and I have some good news, if you think it’s crazy now, it’s only the beginning ha ha. But if you strive to make it a habit to put these points into practice, the years ahead will be so much easier for you because you will have that foundation and you will know that God is right there by your side, helping you along the way. Remember, this parenting thing will be different for everyone. Don’t beat yourself up if you aren’t like that “other mom”, you know~the one that is perfect and has her life all together. You be you, the perfect mom God created for your children. Ask God for help. Stay close to Him in prayer and through His word. Show grace to your children and to yourself. I promise it will change your life.
6/28/2020
Dear Daddies EverywhereDEAR DADDIES EVERYWHERE
When did it happen? This little boy turned into a little man. I wanted to squeeze him tight, and whisper urgings to ‘please stop growing so fast’. I could see him as I rode my bike his way. Walking alone from my dad’s house to his own. I stopped and asked where his little feet were taking him. “I’m getting my fishing pole” he replied. His next words hit me hard~ ”My daddy told me he trusts me”. Was he really that old already? Wasn’t it just yesterday he was sitting on his daddy’s lap? What happened to my baby grandson? He was a little man. Alone, fetching his fishing supplies. I smiled as I watched him gather them up and walk back to my dad’s. He informed me he didn’t need any help. I watched as he put the worm on his hook, as he threw his line out and reeled It in. Over and over. All by himself. A little man that his dad trusted. I thought about the man who was teaching him. His daddy. I thought about all the lessons and habits he would imitate just from watching him. Even now he wanted to be like him. Casting and re-casting. Not giving up. And I thought about his little eyes looking up into his dad’s and seeing a picture of his Heavenly Daddy. We as moms can get so overwhelmed in the mothering, but the same holds true for dads. Sometimes the responsibilities of being a father can be overwhelming. But time passes quickly and every action and reaction shows your children a picture of God and how they will view Him. Whether that means a daddy that has patience, mercy and forgiveness, comfort and love, or a daddy that gets angry easily and has no time for his children because his life is too busy. Daddies everywhere, I wonder if your Heavenly Father is looking down at you and saying- I’m trusting you. I’m trusting you to be a picture of me to your children, the children I gave you. I’m trusting you to teach them through your actions what forgiveness and mercy mean. What love means. What being a daddy is all about. I’m trusting you. There might be times that you mess up, but just like my little man kept putting the worms on his hook and casting his line, he did not give up. Ultimately he wanted his daddy to be proud of him. One day you will be watching this little man of yours as he holds his newborn son. No longer your little boy. You will wish for more time. You will wish for that moment back. That moment he was sitting on your lap as you taught him to fish. You will have to let go and trust him to be the daddy God wants Him to be. He will teach his son all the things that you taught him. Four generations all present as my grandson cast his line that day. His daddy, his BaPa and his Pops all stood watching. I’m sure for my husband and dad, many memories came flooding back of moments with their own boys at this age. Just like it was yesterday. The time is fleeting. They are grown and gone before you know it. Daddies everywhere, does your son see Jesus in you? Do you strive to be like Jesus in everything you do? Is that what he will remember? Don’t give up. Keep up the work. Be that example to your children. Strive to be like your Heavenly Father. Be that picture of Jesus they need to see. It’s never too late. Your Heavenly Father is looking down and telling you~ those children are a gift I gave to you. I trust you. Show them a picture of me.
6/8/2020
I Will Always Be MomI WILL ALWAYS BE MOM
It’s so easy when they’re little. They look up at you with wide eyes, and soak up every word. They believe you. You’re mom, so your words to them must be true. “You’re so beautiful.” You’re such a big boy.” “Hold on to my hand when we cross the street.” “Don’t talk to strangers.” “You’re doing great.” But then~ Things change. It gets harder. You can see it in their little eyes. Trusting innocence is missing and it squeezes your heart. “Don’t listen to what those kids are saying about you. You are beautiful. You are strong. “Don’t let go of my hand around your friends. Don’t be embarrassed to hug me one more time...” And your heart says~ “Not yet. I’m not ready. You’re still my little one~ No matter how old you get, I will always hold your hand. I will never let go. I will always be here. I will always be mom.” And then~ It gets even harder. Their eyes roll as you speak. It hurts, but you pretend that it doesn’t as you scold. “Don’t hang around with that crowd.” “Don’t let go of God’s hand.” “Don’t fall for that person. They don’t love you. They don’t treat you right~ God has so much more for you.” And then~ Their eyes sparkle with happiness. You breathe that sigh of relief. When God worked on their hearts and held their hands. When God brought a spouse that loved them with the love you prayed for all along. When you thought the “don’t’s” were behind you~ you find yourself being a mom still. Because that’s what moms do. They protect. They pray over. They worry and they warn. Because they’ve lived it. They’ve seen things that cause happiness and hope. Joy and forgiveness. Comfort and love. But they’ve also seen heartache. Things that cause pain. Things that tear you away from your spouse. Away from God. You speak your heart. Inside it screams~ please listen to me. They say “thank’s mom”, but their eyes say~ “mom can be so dramatic about things .” They say “I know mom”, but their eyes say~ “mom worries about way too much.” And deep inside, your heart whispers~ ”No matter how old you get, I will always hold your hand. I will never let go. I will always be mom. “ And then the day comes that their eyes are looking into the little eyes of their own children, the eyes that soak up every word. The little eyes that don’t trust. The eyes that roll when they speak. And your child looks your way. Their eyes catch yours and they say, “I understand mom.” Their eyes say “thank you.” And their eyes soak up everything you say again, because they’ve been there. They’ve seen the things that cause heartache and pain, and they don’t want their little ones to go through those same things. They’ve also seen the things that bring happiness and hope. Joy and forgiveness. Comfort and love. And with a smile, they lean in and whisper to their little one~ “I will always hold your hand. I will never let go. I will always be mom.”
5/14/2020
Happy Mother’s Day!HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!
2 minute read I’ve been a mother for 34 of the 35 years I’ve been married~ but I remember... I couldn’t wait for him to come through the door. We had only been dating a month, but my heart knew it was love. Every time he walked in, my world felt like sunshine and happiness. It felt like forever. And then... I couldn’t wait for him to come through the door. The baby had been crying all day. Potty training and terrible two’s, piled on top of the sleepless nights of a newborn. I felt depleted and alone and just wanted help. A break. When he walked in, I just wanted to check out. My respite from a long day that seemed to feel like forever. Little kids fighting grew into teenagers back talking. In those blurred moments there were times I lost sight of the beauty of motherhood and what a precious gift it was. Sometimes I lost sight of my first forever love, and took it out on him. When did it stop? With each phase of mothering, a little piece of that “first forever feeling” got taken away. When did his presence become what I wanted FROM him instead of the love I had FOR him? But then... I couldn’t wait for him to come through the door. The house had been so quiet lately. I had so much to tell him. As I sat and waited, all my first “forever” feelings came flooding back. I could picture him walking through the door those first few months of dating. My heart smiled as I remembered. Crying babies and terrible two’s seemed so long ago. What I thought felt like forever went by in the blink of an eye. The good far outweighed the bad. I saw that now, and I was so thankful for every minute of it. I was so thankful for every minute that lay ahead. My forever future with the daddy of my children. Mama, one of the best things you can give your children is to show them how much you love their daddy. It will change the way you mother. It will change your children. It will change your marriage. It will change your forever. Sometimes I think moms turn mothering into martyrdom. Being a mom is a gift from God. There will be times we are depleted, times we feel alone and needy. There will be times we want to be appreciated, but don’t allow yourself to become the martyr. That’s not what being a mom is at all. Being a mom is a beautiful result and celebration of the love you share with your husband. A glorious picture of the love Christ has for us. A selfless love. A love that brings true joy. Mother’s Day is our celebration of that love. Our children are paying attention. Their behavior is learned by watching our relationships. Let’s make sure we aren’t teaching them to go to God only for what we want FROM Him and not because of the love we have FOR Him. Don’t ever use the sacredness of motherhood as an excuse to become a martyr. Put the pieces of your “forever first love” back together. It’s never too late. You hold the gift of showing your children how precious being a mother is and why we celebrate it~not just on Mothers Day, but every day~ from now until forever. “Who is left among you that saw this house in her first glory? and how do ye see it now?” Haggai 2:3 “Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love.” Revelation 2:4
2/26/2020
I Miss My KidsI MISS MY KIDS
Tonight I walked upstairs to brush my teeth and it hit me. I miss my kids. How many times had I walked up these very stairs to tuck them in at night? They don’t live across the country. They don’t even live an hour away. They live right here in my hometown. But now and then, I still miss them. I miss washing dinner dishes on a Monday night, as I hear them all laughing with their daddy in the other room. I miss all of us squeezing in together on the couch for family movie night. I miss having an after school snack ready for them as they walked through the door. I miss helping them with homework and school projects, floats and parades. I miss telling them to get their pajamas on and brush their teeth. I miss praying with them every night, kissing them and tucking them in. I miss checking on them in the soft moon light and watching them sleep. I miss getting them all ready for church, and the chaos of getting out the door on time. I miss watching them play in the backyard, washing dirty clothes and folding endless laundry. I miss their bad dreams and long nights. I miss being exhausted from those long nights, because they were there next to me so I could keep them safe. I miss hearing them fight and watching them make up. I miss their snuggles, love notes and hand written coupons on every special occasion for “extra kisses and hugs”. I miss telling them to pick up their toys and clean their rooms every single day. I miss cheering them on for every sport activity or band performance. I miss being at the school to help them with costumes or watch Christmas plays or bring in birthday snacks. I miss the magic of Christmas morning and the fun of Easter baskets. I miss their smell, their laughter, their endless questions. I miss them needing me. Everything you think is so wonderful and everything you think is so very hard~ Young mama~ that’s what I miss. And someday when they are grown and married and you wonder what they’ve been up to and how they are, when you wish you could spend just a little more time or talk a little longer, when they tell you they are busy or laugh and say you’re being nosey~ You remember this day. Today. Today when you get to do all the hard stuff. Because at the end of today~ you get to hold them close, you get to feel their soft kisses and hear their little declarations of love. And tomorrow mama, tomorrow you get to do it all over again, until the tomorrow comes when you don’t get to anymore. 
2/10/2020
Can God Restore What Is So Broken?CAN GOD RESTORE WHAT IS SO BROKEN?
I could hear them screaming at each other upstairs. Again. Crying ensued followed by slamming doors and the words “I hate you!”. This was a daily occurrence and one that broke my heart. Teenage sisters living in the same room. One mirror. Three girls. Daily fights. I didn’t have a sister. I always wanted one. This was not what I imagined when they were little. I had this idea that they would grow up to be best friends. Sharing secrets and dreams. Doing each other’s hair, sharing outfits, actually wanting to be together. I never imagined feeling exhausted before my day even began. I never imagined myself crying as they left for school every day or begging God to heal a relationship that I thought could never be healed. I kid you not, it was something that went on almost every day for a year. I truly believe they hated each other that year. It was something I went to God about daily, begging Him to change hearts and restore what was broken. I have to admit, I didn’t have a whole lot of faith when I went to Him. I wasn’t sure He could restore what was SO broken. But He could. And He showed me it had nothing to do with me being some perfect parent and everything to do with Him being a perfect Savior. It had nothing to do with my prayers but everything to do with His promises. Yes He wanted me to go to Him in my despair. Yes He wanted me to lean on Him, have faith in Him, trust Him for the healing~ but when my flesh failed me, He did not. Don’t ever stop praying mama, even after your prayers have been answered. It’s not the power of your prayers that will make a difference in your children’s lives it’s the power of the One who hears our prayers and answers. And He will answer. It might take years. It did in my situation and there are still moments where those old days flare their ugly head and the deceiver tries to convince those girls that some things never change. But God. God is faithful. He is more powerful. His Spirit continually reminds them to think on what is true and good and righteous. To love like He loves and forgive as He forgives. He softens their hearts and He reminds them Who their hearts belong to. So go to Him mama. He is a friend that sticks closer than a brother (or sister)~~ but it’s a beautiful thing when that sister is also a best friend. THIS~ HELPLESS, OUT OF CONTROL, MOM OF ADULTS~ PHASE.
Lately It seems as if I see more and more articles about the mom life and how hard it is. How fast it goes. I’ve read encouragement about everything from babies to teenagers and even advice as they leave for college or their happily ever after with the love of their lives. There are so many tough transitions through all these phases, but I rarely read about this new phase. This helpless, out of control, mom of adults phase. I thought crying babies who wouldn’t sleep was hard. I thought their first day of school and kindergarten graduation was hard. I thought their first crush, their first heartbreak, their college prep, senior trip and last summer at home was hard. When they went to college I cried my eyes out. When they got married I wasn’t quite ready. But once they leave~ really leave and are on their own~ no one tells you how incredibly hard that is. It’s hard because you feel like you no longer have any control whatsoever. They don’t live under your roof. You can’t protect them. And just as it was so very hard when they were little and sick and crying, this is even harder. I’m sure all of you moms have faced one of these situations. Suddenly they’re no longer tucked in upstairs, they’re hundreds of miles from home. They don’t have a cough or a tummy ache, they have cancer. They aren’t having a bad dream, they’re living a bad dream. They didn’t have an adolescent boy break their heart. They had a husband break their marriage. They didn’t lose their favorite baby doll. They lost a child. There are no band aids and kisses that can heal that pain. Mama rocking them to sleep doesn’t make all the bad go away. And this~ this is agonizing. It’s in our mom DNA to make that pain go away. To make everything better. To whisper words of comfort. To hold them and sing lullabies. To fix every boo boo and dry every tear. That’s what we’re supposed to do~ but we can’t. No one ever warned me what a mother’s heart goes through. Sleepless nights that don’t go away, no matter their age. They’re still your baby, and if they’re crying you are crying and your heart is shattered. So what then? What does a mama do when all seems so hopeless. When all control is lost and we can’t do what a mama is supposed to do? We realize that it was never really us to begin with. It was God in us. God in the touch of a mother’s hand. God in the whispers of her heart. God in the softness of her arms. God in the reassurance of her words. God has never left them and He never will. He is the one who will be there now. Continuing to do all these things that we no longer can. He will hold them. He will comfort them. He will whisper to their hearts. He will sing lullabies to their souls. They will never be alone. He will watch over them and wrap His loving arms around them. Trust Him that he will continue to do what He has been doing through you all along mama. It isn’t easy. It’s very, very hard. We as mothers would take that pain and heart ache for our children a thousand times over if we could. But we can’t. So now it’s time to give that pain and all the shattered pieces to Jesus. Place that child in His tender, loving arms and watch Him do miracles that mamas do, but no longer can. You know in your mama heart how deep your love for your children is. Hold on to that knowledge remembering~ His love is infinitely deeper than ours could ever be.
12/19/2019
December 19th, 2019TUCKED AWAY IN A MAMA’S HEART~
“But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart.” Luke 2:19 There are so many emotions tucked away in a mama’s heart. The older she gets, the more that heart fills~ It fills with all the precious memories of days gone by. It fills with the pictures of tiny faces declaring their love. It fills with thoughts of arms once full, that now are empty. It fills with wonder at why she wanted time to go by so quickly and stop~ all at once. There are happy emotions and there are sad. There is the knowing at how life can turn out, and having to watch her children make decisions that she knows will have consequences. Choices that she made herself. Warnings that she wants to give because she has lived it. There are pleas to the Father to hold them close and not let go. To protect them and give them hearts that are always listening for His gentle whispers of love. Each step in a mama’s life is a new journey. As she looks into the face of her tiny baby child for the first time, she suddenly realizes how loved she truly was by her own mama. But until she takes that next step, she doesn’t understand her mama’s heart today, this very moment, and all the emotions it contains. Someday she will. Someday she will be looking into the tiny eyes of her children’s children and a flood of yesterdays will rush over her as a flood of tomorrow’s take their place. And she will know so much of what those tomorrow’s hold because she has a heart of wisdom from days gone by. Her children may wonder and worry as each new step is taken in this journey of motherhood. But dear daughter, she has lived it and breathed it. She has witnessed your future up until this point. Like footprints in the snow, she is leaving a path for you to follow. With age she has realized more and more that the farther away those steps take her from the days she held you in her arms, the closer her steps are to her Savior. There is a sweetness that comes with each step. A peace and a comfort she longs for you to have. Because she is no longer making her own footprints, she is walking in His. She trusts in the path He is leaving her. She knows she no longer has to make her own way, but can blindly follow the leading of a Father who knows what is best. Walk behind her in her wisdom, Walk beside her in her age. And just as you grasped her hands so tightly as you took your very first steps, don’t let go~ No matter how old you are~ Hold on to her hand now as she leads you forward Always knowing~ He is leading her as she is holding His. Ponder the path you are leaving for your children and your children’s children. ❤️ Psalm 33:21, 56:3-4, Isaiah 26:3-4 Philippians 4:6-7 John 14:27
12/4/2019
Dirty Dishes & Christmas ChaosDIRTY DISHES & CHRISTMAS CHAOS
I wrote this post to encourage young mothers but yesterday as I read it, God spoke to this grandma’s heart about how much I needed these very words. Amidst all the chaos of this season~ I just need Him. As darkness still covered the world in the early morning hours, how many of those mornings did she cry? How she longed for just a little time alone with her Savior. Just one morning. But again, little footsteps interrupted. Little cry’s from a crib down the hall. Little pleas for breakfast and snuggles. Why couldn’t she just have one moment? Dear mama, don’t you realize~ He is in every moment. Somehow we look at our lives and see our peace and comfort coming from things we think we need~ And if we don’t get that, we can tend to be irritated and down or depressed and angry. Just one moment. Why can’t it be ours? Sweet mama, amidst all the chaos surrounding you throughout your day~ The phone ringing. The dog barking. The cartoons on television. The baby crying. The laundry piled everywhere and the dishes in the sink. Close your eyes. And see Him. He is there. He is always there. Every single moment is not ours, It is His. He is there next to you every morning in that darkness. He is smiling at your child. He is whispering His love to their hearts and to yours. He is singing lullabies to your baby and snuggling with your toddler. He is providing breakfast for hungry tummy’s and blankets for morning snuggles. He is sitting right there next to you and He is listening. He can hear your very heart, even when you can’t hear it yourself. He understands exactly what we need~more than we even do, or ever could. He longs for you to know He is ever present. He isn’t only there in your morning worship and prayers. He isn’t only there in a church building or a praise song. He promises us that He is with us ALWAYS, and at times that is hard for our human minds to comprehend. He is with you right this very moment. He is standing next to you as the phone rings and the dog barks. As the cartoons play and the baby cries. As the laundry piles up and the dishes need washing. If need be~ stop everything and literally picture Him there. Don’t only speak to Him throughout your day, but ask Him to speak to you. He is right there next to you and once your heart understands this, truly understands this~ everything changes. He is shushing your anxious heart and whispering to your soul~ “Right now, I just need you to be a mama. My glory shines in the smile of your little one, in the home you are making, in the little, everyday, seemingly unimportant tasks of a mama. My glory shines through you sweet mama. I am here, right here next to you. You don’t need a few moments alone. You only need me~ And I am ALWAYS~right here.”  Psalm 139:7-10 Hebrews 13:5 Joshua 1:5 Deuteronomy 31:6,8 Matthew 11:28 Philippians 4:13, 19 |
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