11/10/2023
My Great GodSometimes the hope we need for miracles in our own lives, come from the miracles and praises of others.
This is the season we will see countless posts and quotes about thankfulness. Why to be grateful and how to be thankful. They are all great reminders, but today I am not going to talk about any of them. Today I’m going to share some hope. Today I’m going to talk about my Jesus, and tell you how great our God is. Ever since my dad passed away in 2020, my heart has struggled with holding on and letting go. Letting go of his belongings (right down to a little magnifying glass he used to read his prescriptions), letting go of his home, and holding on to memories. Every time I thought about selling his home, I cried. I couldn’t. It was a heavy, internal struggle to say the least. So I prayed. And I prayed, and I prayed and I prayed, and I never felt a peace, and I never got an answer. My son and daughter in law were living there during this time. It made my heart happy that family lived within the walls that held so many memories for me, so I continually pushed the idea of selling all the way to the back of my mind… until the day they told us they were moving. I’ll be honest. I cried. And then I prayed some more. God had opened a door for my son that was literally a miracle. A dream house for them to be able to purchase. Something they had been praying about for a very long time themselves. And yet, in that moment I struggled. While they were getting their dream, I wanted to hold on to mine. Keeping a physical part of my dad for as long as possible. God continued to nudge my heart though, so I continued to pray. I remember telling one of my children that I wished God would just audibly tell me what to do. Don’t you feel that way sometimes? I was scared. I didn’t want to let go. I pondered all these things. I didn’t even talk to my husband about it. It was a Saturday in August when it was particularly heavy on my heart. An answer needed to come. The home would soon be empty and the mortgage was high. I begged God that day to show me. I asked him for specifics. An exact request. The entire day went by without an answer and late that night, when I thought no answer had come, God surprised me. He literally answered the exact request I had prayed for. I cried again. I don’t believe God speaks audibly to us, but in that moment it was as close to audible as you can get. He used His word. He used prayer. He used other believers. His Holy Spirit worked miracles through it all. This might seem trivial to you, but it was heart wrenching to me. Until God answered. And suddenly, the peace He gave me passed all understanding. A peace that could only come from Him. God was telling me to sell. Let me tell you what happened within the next 24 hours. We had 2 people interested in buying. And then, early Sunday morning I remembered that a friend of mine had asked me a year ago if I would be willing to sell. At the time I told her no. As a quick gesture, I let her know that I was now willing. Three interested people before we ever listed! And just like that, 24 hours later, my dad’s home sold for our asking price. Not only did it sell, it sold to my sweet friend. She was just as happy as I was, and told me that she had been praying about it! I couldn’t imagine anyone else living there and loving it like my dad did. God put her name on my heart that Sunday morning. Not only that, but my son and daughter told us they were expecting. After 5 heartbreaking years of trying, and praying and begging God, their miracle baby was here. They had a dream home and a baby coming. And I wept and I wept and I wept. God’s perfect timing was an understatement. And today I want to praise him. Today I want to thank him. Today I want to give you hope~don’t stop praying and seeking and asking and begging… And praising and thanking. He truly is our God of miracles. He is my Father who understands my frail humanity and has compassion on my hurting heart. Who sympathizes with my inconsequential struggling and fear, in the midst of a world filled with far worse. And despite the innumerable prayers lifted up to Him from all over this world, He cares about me. He continually reaches down and pulls me close, whispering to my heart that He understands. That’s my God. As hard as it is when you’re going through the process, don’t give up on Him. He knows exactly when to answer those prayers. Nothing is too big. Nothing is too small. And when the answer comes, and it will come, thank Him. Praise Him. And then, share that hope with the world. SCRIPTURE READING: Isaiah 12:2 Psalm 86:1-10, 12-13, 15 Psalm 88:1-3, 9, 13 Psalm 89:1-2, 5-8, 15-17 Ephesians 1:3-7, 12, 18-19
10/7/2023
Peace Be StillI barely came up for air when another wave crashed down upon me.
There had been a respite. I felt His peace, and relief swept over me. Trials seemed to be eased, and prayers answered. Until this week. It wasn’t a horrible diagnosis, a job loss or a death. It was a small attack of satan in the middle of the night as I slept peacefully, completely unaware. For the second time in a week, my Facebook account was hacked. Not only was it hacked, but the person posing as me posted evil pictures on my page, and in a chat. I woke up to a notification on my phone. Facebook told me I had violated their policies and I was locked out. I was sick inside. I couldn’t do anything about it. I couldn’t even defend myself. I couldn’t tell any of you, or ask for prayer. I felt so confused inside. Was this Satan attacking me, or God trying to teach me something? I prayed all day. I also tried to refute the issue, and somehow defend myself in order to get control back of my page. But at the end of the day, my weary heart realized it wasn’t in my control at all. It actually never was. And honestly, Meta may think they have control, but God has the final say. So I had to ask myself~ do I have enough faith to trust Him through this? What if Holding Hope disappeared? What if 12,000 followers became 1 and I had to start all over? What if I couldn’t use this platform to reach others again? What if God was saying “no” to me, would that be ok? What if the “busy” things I was complaining about in my heart last week were my reality this week? I am not questioning God. I am asking Him for discernment and wisdom to know why this is happening. I am checking my own heart for sin. I am asking God to overcome the wicked one, and the darkness that seemed to have won. It’s incredibly hard for me to be able to read the comments on my posts, comments asking for prayer or saying things are hard right now~and I am unable to respond. I am unable to encourage. But, encouragement won’t end with me. If my page were to end today, God is faithful. He will send others to those in need of encouragement. I am reminded of my words from last week again. I am not God. God will be God, with or without me, and He will get the glory. Satan may have attacked, but God has taught me so much in just a few short days. He is my light in the darkness. His light will continue to shine and He will prevail. And if I am able, that is the message I want to leave with you. Whatever you are facing today, continue to pray through it. That is literally all I can do right now. Continue to check your own heart. Continue to ask God for wisdom and discernment. Continue to fight that darkness with Jesus’ light. Even if you were falsely accused. Even if you can’t defend yourself. Even if you feel all is lost. Even when it looks like Satan has won and the winds and waves are just too much to bear, remember~ our God walks on water and our God walks on the wings of the wind. Our God is light in that darkness. Our God always makes a way. This morning I came back up for air and the winds and the waves did not overcome. I could hear His very words~Peace be still. And so I wait. As I write this I am still locked out, but I’m not alone. God is in complete control. None of this came as a surprise to Him. You are not alone either. You are never alone. God is with you. His light will shine through your darkness. He will calm the storms around you and He will prevail when all seems lost. Even in the unknown~The battle has already been won my friends, and Jesus is our Victor!! SCRIPTURE READING: Psalm 139:11-12 Psalm 34:4, 6, 8, 15, 17, 19, 22 1 Corinthians 10:13 Psalm 35:1-2, 7, 9-12, 15-23, 25, 27-28 Psalm 36:5, 7, 9-11 Psalm 37:1, 3-7, 23-26, 32-33, 35-36, 39-40 Psalm 104:3 Mark 4:39-40 Matthew 14:25, 27, 30-33 1 Corinthians 15:57 Romans 8:37 2 Corinthians 2:14 Deuteronomy 20:4 Romans 8:31 John 16:33 Isaiah 55:11 When I was in the third grade my parents told me we were moving. My little heart was broken. I think I cried for a month. I didn’t want to leave my friends, and the home I loved so much. I can remember throwing rocks at the For Sale sign in our front yard, I even pulled it out of the ground once and hid it.
But then we moved, and slowly I came to love our new home. The one we endearingly called “the farm”. My imagination came alive on that old farm. I began writing stories in the fourth grade. It was a place to dream, and I sat and dreamed a lot. I sat at my piano overlooking our beautiful apple orchard. I sat in the apple trees. I sat in the kitchen shucking corn and snapping beans.I sat on the hills overlooking acres and acres of breathtaking land. I sat in bed as my mom read to me each night. I sat in church and I sat in confessional every week. I sat on our horse and I sat in our hayloft. I sat on our cellar door and on our milk house steps. I even sat in our out house. And… I sat and cried when we had to move again. I loved that old farm. God had given me something beautiful and then taken it away. It wasn’t the first time little Charisse went through something painful, and it certainly wasn’t the last. Here’s the thing though, Today I can sit and I can see why. Not only did I become “me” on that farm, due to heartbreaking circumstances involving the move, my family came to know Christ. And today I sit at His feet. What a beautiful place to dream. Time and time again I thought God was taking the wonderful things I loved away from me because I did something wrong. Surely He was punishing me. But that wasn’t the case at all. Each time God took something, He replaced it with something so much better. He did it because He loves me. And now at the age of 57, I can’t even count the number of times God has done this in my life. Given me something better. With His grace in my heart and His word on my lap, today I sit and smile. When people invite you to sit, you know that old saying~ “Take a load off”? That’s literally what Christ tells us to do. Give Him the load. Imagine if we made a New Year’s resolution to sit more. I think people would laugh if you told them that was your intention. Sitting is such an easy thing to do. How often do we do it without a thought… but what if we actually did think about it every time we sat down? Giving all your heaviness to Christ and recalling all the times He blessed you with something better. Whatever you might be going through today, sit with Jesus. You might not understand things now, but if you will just sit with Him through it, you will see that His “beautiful” is always so much better than our own. No striving. No trying to figure things out. Just sitting with Jesus. What a beautiful place to dream. what a beautiful place to be. SCRIPTURE READING Jeremiah 29:11 Psalm 77:1-14, 78:4,6-7
11/18/2022
Not My StoryMy son’s birthday is this week.
What do I want for my son? A child. More than anything, a child. My heart longs for it desperately for him. I thought it was my story to tell when I got pregnant with my son by mistake. I thought it was my story to tell when the doctor told us he would have birth defects and abortion was a recommendation. I thought it was my story to tell when we said “absolutely not.” I thought it was my story to tell when he had a fibral seizure and lost his hearing. I thought it was my story to tell when I watched him walk to school every day and he would wave at me the entire time, until he was no longer in sight. I thought it was my story when I watched his tenderness with his sisters, with children and with babies and couldn’t wait to see the day that he would become a daddy. A wonderful, compassionate, selfless daddy. I thought it was my story to tell when he slowly grew away from God. I thought it was my story to tell when I prayed for him to return. I thought it was my story to tell when he surrendered to God’s call. When I prayed for the woman God would have for him. The woman who would love God and my son with her everything. And God answered. I thought it was my story to tell when I saw the love she had for children and babies and I knew that one day she would be a wonderful, compassionate, selfless mama. And I thought it was my story to tell you today that she isn’t, because they have not conceived despite the years of trying. Despite the tears. Despite the prayers. It is an unanswered request. My story wasn’t really my story after all. One day it became my son’s story as he stood behind a pulpit and shared the journey his life took. The road that led him to today. The steps that God directed to this very place in time. The ache inside my soul for my son and daughter cannot be compared to the empty ache they feel. It is a loneliness and a longing that cannot be described. It is a “hard” a mama never wants to see her child experience. And yet, if ever that cliche quote were true, it is true of them~ “My story for His glory”. I know that God has a purpose. His timing is perfect. There is a reason. We do not know what the future holds, only God does. I never imagined a future for my son that didn’t include children. It crushes my heart to even pen the words. It’s a future I do not want to face. It’s a future I have to give to God daily, some days minute by minute. But it isn’t my story to tell. And today I realize, it’s not even my son’s story to tell. It’s God’s story. Today I can only tell you my chapter of that story. My son and daughter will continue it and in my heart I want to believe that perhaps one day, miraculously they will repeat it to their child and their child will continue to tell it. And in the telling, hurting hearts will be healed. I might not ever know the end of the story, but I’m so thankful God does. Whatever that ending might be, I know it will be good and wonderful and miraculous. It has never been about me. It’s not even about us. It’s about God. Future generations being brought to a Savior who loves them beyond any human love a mother or father could ever give. A hope for the hurting. Those future generations might not ever hold our namesake, but they can hold God’s, if we just continue to share His story. A story for His glory. Scripture Reading: “One generation shall praise thy works to another, And shall declare thy mighty acts. I will speak of the glorious honour of thy majesty, And of thy wondrous works. And men shall speak of the might. And I will declare thy greatness. They shall abundantly utter the memory of thy great goodness, And shall sing of thy righteousness. The LORD is good to all: And his tender mercies are over all his works. They shall speak of the glory of thy kingdom, And talk of thy power; To make known to the sons of men his mighty acts, And the glorious majesty of his kingdom. Thy kingdom is an everlasting kingdom, And thy dominion endureth throughout all generations. The LORD upholdeth all that fall, And raiseth up all those that be bowed down.” Psalm 145:4-7, 9, 11-14 “For the LORD is good; his mercy is everlasting; And his truth endureth to all generations.” Psalm 100:5 “This shall be written for the generation to come: And the people which shall be created shall praise the LORD.” Psalm 102:18 “Which we have heard and known, And our fathers have told us. We will not hide them from their children, shewing to the generation to come, The praises of the LORD, and his strength, and his wonderful works that he hath done. That the generation to come might know them, Even the children which should be born; Who should arise And declare them to their children: That they might set their hope in God, And not forget the works of God, but keep his commandments:” Psalm 78:3-4, 6-7 “Now also when I am old and grayheaded, O God, forsake me not; until I have shewed thy strength unto this generation, and thy power to every one that is to come”. Psalm 71:18 “Nevertheless he saved them for his name's sake, That he might make his mighty power to be known.” Psalm 106:8
6/24/2022
Your No Might Be God’s YesI can remember sitting in Cobo arena with my parents.
Thousands of people were there to hear one man speak. I was probably only in 7th or 8th grade but I can vividly remember looking at that crowd and thinking how amazingly beautiful it would be if I were in that man’s shoes, reaching and encouraging thousands for the Lord. I prayed that someday, somehow I could glorify Jesus that way. I finished high school with a longing in my heart to be a teacher. I enrolled in college with a major in elementary education. I loved teaching and I loved children. I just knew God placed that desire within me and I prayed that someday that desire would be fulfilled. I got married and we started a family. Since grade school I had dreamt of becoming an author and publishing a book. I started with a course on children’s writing. I had so many thoughts in my head that I wanted my pen to tell. I prayed that someday, when my children were grown and my life was less busy God would allow me that dream. In each instance I asked God~ Would You allow this for me? Could You? But as the years went by~ I thought His answer to each of these was no. I have never gotten to reach or encourage thousands of people in an arena. I never was an elementary school teacher. I never wrote or published a book. I married a pastor and eventually we moved to a small town in the thumb of MI. No huge crowds. No large arenas. A pastor’s wife at a tiny church of less than 100. The years went by. I raised my children and watched and prayed as each left our little home and then one day... as I sat and listened to the broken heart of a woman seeking counsel, God whispered to my own heart to begin something new. That was this. The beginning of Holding Hope. And so, yesterday as I thanked Him for this beautiful privilege He has allowed me~ He showed me. He would, He could and He did. 40 years after the quiet prayer of a shy girl in the midst of thousands, He answered. He didn’t answer in the way I expected. No, I don’t get up in an arena and talk to thousands. From my very small town in the Midwest, God chose to use social media as His platform instead. Holding Hope. No, I never taught in a school. God brought me to a church where, for a long time I was the only teacher for the children there. For 25 years He has allowed me to fulfill that dream and today I teach along side my own children in that very same church. And no, I have never published or even written a book, but every week God allows this pen to write the stories He puts in my heart. Don’t give up. Wherever you might be right now, whatever your prayer, whatever your dream~ God has your answer. It might not come tomorrow or next week or next year. It might take 40 years, but He will answer. Hold on to that hope. You might be a student, sitting in a classroom wondering if God could ever use you to reach and encourage others. You might be a mama, sitting in the middle of babies and bottles and diapers with a “someday” dream tucked away in your heart. You might be a grandmother who hasn’t even realized that God has already answered your prayers. He has always been faithful, even in my unfaithfulness. My no was His yes. Search your heart for His yes and when you find it, you will find so many more answers to the prayers you have whispered through the years. Prayers you may have forgotten~ but He never did, and He never will. *Repost from 1/23/20
3/11/2020
In The WaitingIN THE WAITING
2 minute read When she was a baby, my daughter Jessica was almost bald. The first year of her life she remained that way. When she finally had enough hair to put into little pig tails, I think I was more excited than she was. I told her to wait by the door for daddy to get home so she could show him. This soon became a habit of hers, waiting for daddy at the door. She seemed to know exactly what time to go and wait. Often peeking through the windows, or just sitting happily in front of the screen watching for him. She never got tired of waiting. She knew without a doubt that he would come. There would be times that he was running late due to traffic or errands, but that little girl never grew impatient. And when he finally showed up, you would’ve thought it was the best day of her life, every single day. The joy and excitement that sweet girl had always brought me to tears. He was daddy. He would pick her up and hold her and tell her how beautiful she was. If she was hurt or sad, scared or sick he would tell her it was going to be ok. He would kiss her boo boo and just like that, everything was made right. What happens that steals that childlike faith from our hearts? That trust in the waiting that turns to impatience? We want everything fixed right now and when it isn’t, we lose all faith that things can change. Our prayers become words that hold little hope. We stop believing He will come home to our hearts and make all our hurt and sadness, fear and discouragement go away. The wait becomes harder and harder and pretty soon we close the door of our hearts and give up on God. But my friend, He is coming. He is not limited by errands or traffic. He is never so busy that He can’t get to us. He is constant. Always hearing our prayers. Always working on our behalf. His timing is perfect and we must trust Him that He has a purpose for the wait. The end of your wait might be right around the corner, and when that day comes~ and it will come~there is nothing like it. The joy your heart feels and the excitement it holds will wipe every tear away. He will come in and kiss the hurt that your heart holds. He will lift you up and make your heart beautiful. Everything will be made right. Don’t give up in the waiting. Don’t close the door, worship in the doorway. He is your daddy~ and He is coming home. “Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord.” Psalms 27:14 “I wait for the Lord, my soul doth wait, and in his word do I hope.” Psalms 130:5 “He trusted on the Lord that he would deliver him: let him deliver him, seeing he delighted in him.” Psalms 22:8 “It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the Lord.” Lamentations 3:26 “But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31 “Therefore I will look unto the Lord; I will wait for the God of my salvation: my God will hear me.” Micah 7:7 “My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him. He only is my rock and my salvation: he is my defence; I shall not be moved. In God is my salvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God. Trust in him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us. Selah.” Psalms 62:5-8 “Delight thyself also in the Lord; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass. And he shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, and thy judgment as the noonday. Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for him...” Psalms 37:4-7a |
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