NOW I’M THAT MOM
Hey all you mamas out there~
What is it that you want from your children?
Not FOR them, but FROM them.
Does that sound selfish?
Let go of the idea that it is, and look deep into your mama heart.
What do you want more than anything FROM your kids?
Love? Respect? Compassion?Thankfulness? Time?
When they are tiny little ones, the answers are a lot easier.
What we probably want most is rest.
We don’t think a lot about the other things.
The fact is, when they are tiny they automatically do all the other things.
But then they get a little older.
Love is still there, but that respect thing starts to lose its footing.
A little older, and thankfulness and compassion turn into eyes rolling and heavy sighs.
Still, a little bit older and we would give anything for time.
Time with the ones who were our whole world for so long.
How quickly things change.
Our babies once snuggled on our laps, begging us to read to them, soaking up the sound of our voice with sweet, childlike adoration.
And then, adulthood in all her glory turns that childlike adoration to annoyance and frustration if we call and want to talk.
How quickly it changes from making every “boo boo” better with just a kiss.
From caring for their sick little bodies through the night, to more annoyance if we share our concerns when they aren’t well.
I can remember all of these scenarios in my own life with my mother, but they are only a memory now.
My little self wanting to be with her and like her. Wanting to spend time with her. Wanting to be taken care of.
Time changes things.
I became a mom. Amidst the endless responsibilities young children bring, the phone rings and it annoys me. I know it is her.
I’m so ashamed of the thoughts my mouth would not utter~ “She always picks the worst time to call. I don’t have TIME to talk to her right now!”
But then one morning the phone rings again. Amidst the chaos of craziness that surrounds me, I hear nothing but my dad’s voice~almost as if he is speaking in slow motion...
“Your mom is gone”~
My breath escapes me as my entire world rushes backward. I long to give more love, more respect, more compassion, more thankfulness, more time.
So much more time.
For a very long while, whenever the phone rang after that moment~
I thought for an instant that it was her.
I wanted it to be her.
So, I’m that mom now.
The one on the other end of the phone. Calling, worrying, wondering if they’re ok. Wanting to help. Wanting to love. Wanting to spend time with them. Wanting all of those things.
The same things my mom wanted from me.
And as much as my human mama heart loves her children, it doesn’t touch the love my heavenly Father has for me.
A love that desires all these things.
Love. Respect. Compassion. Thankfulness. Time.
Glory in the time you have with your little ones.
Glory in the time you have with your mama.
Glory in time spent with your Savior.
Don’t allow time to change your child like adoration~
Allow it to deepen the love you have~
Not only for your mama~
but most especially for your Savior.