The doctor came in and immediately I could feel the coldness he brought along with him. My daughter sat in the chair, anxious and excited to finally receive the help she had needed for so long. Minutes into the visit, we both realized she wouldn't be getting any help. She couldn't even get the words she wanted to express out of her mouth. He continually cut her off and by the end of the visit, had her in tears. Can I just say~ I wasn't feeling very lovable at that moment. I seriously wanted to stand up and slap him and then hug my daughter and walk out. I have been very spoiled since living in Huron County when it comes to those in the medical field. They have all been amazing and this was actually a first for me. It can be so easy to sit and write a little devotional on how we should love others despite the way they treat us, you know~ turn the other cheek and all that~ but when we are actually put in a real life situation, it isn't so easy after all. It's not easy, but it is possible. Especially with Christ in our hearts. I can remember so many specific instances that area doctors and nurses gave me such a sense of comfort as I awaited scary procedures, just by the way they treated me. One instance was one I have written about before. The hospital stay where I wasn't allowed to wear makeup. One of the nurses attending me had gone to high school with my two oldest daughters. I couldn't believe time had gone by so quickly and she was now a nurse. I was anxious about seeing anyone I knew in my condition (aka no makeup 😂) but more importantly, I was apprehensive over my upcoming surgery. This sweet friend made me feel like I was receiving a warm, continual hug every time she entered my hospital room. It is a feeling I will never forget and one I will forever be grateful for. Yes, people may treat us horribly. They might treat our loved ones horribly, but the way we react and the way we treat them will remain with them forever. I read a quote this week that said- "People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel" Let's pray that those who tend to make others feel unloved will find us making them feel greatly loved with the unconditional love that only Christ Himself can give. Always be grateful to those who have that special way of making you feel like you are receiving a warm hug just from being in their presence. It is something that is too often taken for granted. I personally want to say~Thank You 💗💗
2/18/2017
We Can't Do It Without His HelpAhhh Valentines Day. After 32 years of marriage, I needed a new idea and I thought I had an awesome one. I planned ahead. I made a steak dinner and a cheesecake, his favorite. We had the house to ourselves for the evening. After dinner I told him I was going to put some laundry away and would be right back. I rushed upstairs and it all went downhill from there...
My husband's family has been going on vacation to NC since before he was born. Every year we all stay together in a beautiful house on the ocean and while we are there one of Mike's favorite things to do is body surf in the waves. Now I love swimming, but the ocean in March in NC is a little too "freezing so much it hurts" for me. So, I sit with my sweatshirt on, wrapped in a blanket and watch. This past summer Mike found the perfect solution at a resale store. A full body dry suit. This would keep me warm and dry in the cold waves. He was ecstatic. I had never tried it on and finally got around to getting it back out. I thought it would be sooo perfect to come downstairs wearing it and surprise him. You know, like some futuristic, hot superhero. Often what we picture in our minds and the reality of what something actually looks like are completely different. I was hot. A hot mess. I had managed to get the legs partially on but from there I was stuck. Literally. I couldn't pull the sleeves up any higher than my waist and I couldn't pull it back off. I couldn't even walk. That thing was like a leach on a hippo. It wouldn't budge, not even an inch. Finally, all I could do was call for Mike. I'm sure this was not at all what he was expecting. Just short of cutting the thing off, a half hour later I was exhausted but free and as Mike held me, we had a good laugh. So much for my great Valentine's idea. Our plans are not always God's plans. We think we have some great idea and go forward with it, never asking God for help or guidance. When we eventually get ourselves into a hot mess, that's when we decide to call out to God for help. Something we should have done to begin with. I should have asked Mike for help right from the start but I was determined I could do this on my own. I pulled and I shoved and I jumped and squirmed and finally just stood there defeated. We are the same way with God. We think we can do it on our own without His help, but we can't. We try to make it work. We pull and shove and squirm but our great plans, that were never God's plans, go terribly wrong and we are defeated. I am so thankful that my God is always there, just waiting for me to call out to Him for help. When I finally do, He comes. He never turns his back on me or tells me it's too late. He pulls me out of the mess I made, He holds me close and He restores my exhausted heart with laughter. Next time we are about to go ahead with a plan we think is sooo perfect, let's remember that leach on that hippo and turn to God first, asking for His help every inch of the way. 😉
2/11/2017
Kay Jewelers Has Nothing On YouI'll be the first to admit it. I was a wimp when I was newly married. When I was sick, I wanted to be coddled. My mom was so good at it. My new husband was not. I soon learned that he didn't have a compassionate bone in his body. At one point I had to have a sinus procedure done and my nose was packed with gauze for quite a long time. When the Dr was finally able to take it out, it was an extremely painful procedure. I had to stay until I was no longer dizzy and when the nurse finally walked me out to the waiting room all I could think was~ "I just want someone to take care of me". My dear husband stood up, walked over, and in front of a waiting room full of people announced quite loudly~ "your nose looks like you could park a car up there". There have been many moments in my 31 years of marriage just like this one. I could choose to pout or be hurt, (and believe me, I was hurt) I could choose to cry and become bitter and angry or I could choose to forgive, to respect, to cherish and to show compassion despite rarely receiving any. I could choose to love as Christ loves and daily bring my marriage and my husband before Him. Valentine's Day is always so commercialized. Hope springs eternal for wives across the country with jewelry and candy in abundance. We as women can tend to wish we could have a husband just like the one Kay Jewelers found. But when we think this way, we tend to overlook all the reasons we fell in love with our own husband to begin with. Just a few short months ago Mike announced that he had bought me an anniversary gift. With hands behind his back and a huge smile on his face, he presented me with it and when I saw it, I laughed and I cried. It wasn't diamonds or flowers or candy. It was an Amope Pedi Perfect. I cried because I had told him almost 4 months earlier how nice it would be to own one. It was never brought up again, but he loves me and he remembered. It wasn't about the gift, it was about the heart of a husband who listens and loves. That meant more to me than any diamond. Ladies, marriage is work. There will be ups and downs. There will be hurtful comments made but there will also be beautiful moments. You might be in the hurtful or you might be in the beautiful but most importantly~you are in it. You didn't vow to love, honor and cherish as long as he did. You vowed to~whether he decides to or not~and you vowed it before God. If we are completely honest with ourselves, we've all had our share of the bad moments too. Myself included. I'm not saying that we should overlook some of the devastating issues that happen in marriages. That's another topic in itself. I'm just trying to point out that we can't let all the little things ruin the best thing. The love we have for our best friend and Valentine. This week, don't wait for your valentine to do something amazing for you. YOU do something amazing for him. Purposely pray for him every day. Get out your wedding album. Reminisce. List all the things you love about him. Show him how precious he is to you. Rekindle the love story you both wrote together. Remember that first look, that first date, that first kiss. Kay Jewelers has nothing on you.
2/4/2017
Not On The Worry, On The Worship"I feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders." Yes I've said that. Too often. In reality it isn't true at all, especially considering what other people are going through in their lives compared to my own. My problem is plain old worry. Why do I allow myself to go there? But I do. Worry about my dad~is he ok? Is he lonely? Does he like living here? Is he eating good? Worry about my kids~are they getting along? When will they feel better? Are their marriages doing well? Are they spending time with God? Worry about my husband~will his knees ever feel better? Is he going through too much stress? Is he worried about finances? (yes, I worry that he worries 🙄) worry about my grandchildren, my brothers, Mike's family, my church family and the list goes on. For some silly reason I have it in my head that it's my responsibility to make sure that they are all happy and healthy and life is a bed of roses. I want everyone to get along and I want everyone happy. The more I add to the pile in my head, the more I feel I am sinking and can't climb out. Mike told me that worry is straight up fear and God clearly tells me in His word that we shouldn't be afraid. If you think about it, it's so true. I'm afraid of bad things happening in my loved ones lives. Things I have no control over. I can't make Mike's knees better any more than I can make my children's health issues go away. I can't control things. But I am a controller and when I can't be in control, I worry. I've read so many devotionals where godly women tell me not to worry, and I often find myself thinking~"easy for you to say" But that's just Satan trying to convince me that my issues are legit and these women don't know the half of it. My issues aren't legit. They are issues that should be placed in the hands of God and left there. I'm selfish when it comes to those issues and like a child with a toy, I keep taking them back. So what's the answer? It's work harder. Not on the worry, but on the Worship. Continually Worship. Continually, all day, every day, bring it to God. Tell Him all of it. Tell Him you are sorry that you keep taking it out of His hands and holding it tight in your own. Ask Him for help. Ask Him to help you love Him more and more and learn to let Him be in control. It sounds so easy on paper, but we as women know it's not. That's why it has to be continual. Often my granddaughter Ellie will ask me to hold on to a toy of hers until she gets home after school. She always instructs me-"don't let Clara get it" and as soon as she is off the bus she asks "did you keep my toy safe? Did Clara get it?" Her asking never bothers me because I love her so much. I just smile and tell her- "no, Clara didn't get it, I kept it safe". Our great God loves us so much that He doesn't mind one bit if we bug Him all day long and ask Him for help in giving Him our worries and fears to hold on to. He just smiles and says-"let me keep this for you. I'll take good care of it". Let's let Him do just that.
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