5/29/2019
The Reality Of ManyTHE REALITY OF MANY
One minute the sun is shining. You’re smiling as you sing along to your favorite iTunes. It’s a perfect Saturday morning. The next minute you’re getting a call from your dad, asking to be taken to emergency. And everything changes. One week turns into two, and then three. For some people this scenario goes on for months or even years. Hospitals. Doctors. Sickness. You feel as if you are living in a dream. Emotional and physical fatigue take control of your normal routine. You can’t sleep at night and you can’t seem to drag yourself out of bed in the morning. You leave your loved one in the evening and hold your breath the next day, waiting to hear from them, trying not to think the worst. And then you do it all over again. You go through the day to day motions, not sure how you even managed. Not only do you find yourself wondering about the distant future, you wonder about tomorrow. You wonder about an hour from now. Sadly, this is the horrible reality of life for many. This is the person next to us in line at the store. This is the lady that quietly comes to church but sits alone. This is the cashier that takes our money with a tired smile. This is the waitress that takes our order with heavy shoulders. This is our brother. This is our sister. This is someone who needs us. Petty little things that disrupt our daily routine do not compare to the heartache others are quietly facing. We get angry over the long lines at the store. We lose our patience with the cashier for taking so long. We snap at the waitress who got our order wrong. We don’t get out of our seat to welcome that lady sitting all alone. Too often life revolves around “me.” We don’t open our eyes to those hurting all around us. We don’t look for opportunities to encourage those we speak to, because we are too busy focusing on ourself. Our day. Our schedule. Our “to-do’s” And all along that lady standing next to you is wondering if her daddy will see tomorrow. That wife is wondering if she will get to see another anniversary with her husband. That mom is wondering if her child will see another birthday. Don’t wait for your own crisis to recognize this. Something I found myself guilty of as I walked down the hospital corridor day after day. As I looked into the rooms of patients that had been there for months and into the tired, heartbroken eyes of loved ones. Look for opportunities to share a kind word, a smile, a meal, a hug. Offer to sit with a loved one who’s been sick far too long. Pick up groceries or run errands for a tired care giver. Look into the eyes of that cashier, that waitress, that person next to you in line, that lady sitting all alone. Look right past yourself and into their eyes. Truly see them. Then do your best to give them a little bit of that Saturday sunshine back again. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO GIVE YOUR CHILDREN? One night long ago, as another baby tooth was put under a pillow awaiting the tooth fairy, I was asked what the Tooth Fairy did with all those baby teeth. It’s one of those moments when a father might panic, but not a mother. God has this way of giving mamas perfect answers on the fly. Either that, or we’re just really good liars. 😉 An idea formed and I began to pen the words to a cute little tale. My daughter Andrea drew the illustrations and when her teacher found out, she asked if I would come in and read it to the class. I’ll never forget the look of excitement on the children’s faces as I began to read. They had all kinds of ideas on how it would end, but only I knew the outcome. I was the author. They wouldn’t know until I finished reading and when I said “The End” smiles lit up the entire classroom. “Looking unto Jesus, the AUTHOR and the FINISHER of our faith...” Hebrews 12:2 Think about those words. Just like I was the author of a unique tale about the Tooth Fairy, Jesus is the Author of our unique life story and He is the Author of our children’s life story. Let that sink in. Not you. Not me. Jesus. And just like I probably have you wondering~”What does the Tooth Fairy do with all those teeth?” 😉, we might constantly wonder what will happen next in our own lives or the lives of our children. Instead of leaving things in God’s hands, we attempt to control each situation, writing our own story, making ourself the hero instead of our Savior. This tends to lead us on a path of worry and frustration instead of joy and peace. Because ultimately~ it is Jesus story. He is our Author and He will finish the story. The story called Faith. If we had our way, if we knew the outcome~ then it wouldn’t be called Faith. It might be called Mistakes, Heartache or Pride. It might be called Worry or Distrust. But not Faith. These things need not overtake us when Jesus is our author. We can sit in His presence with comfort, peace and even joy~looking ahead to what unfolds. Confident that the ending will be written by Someone Who loves us with an unfathomable love. Someone Who knows exactly what is best for us and our children. Allow your children to see His story of faith unfold in your own life. Give them that gift. Teach them to allow Jesus to be their Author as well, understanding that He is the ultimate Hero. Our Hero. His story is not fiction. He will never lie and He will never panic when we ask questions~ because He always has the perfect answer. And that answer will always be Faith. As we go through the heart rending chapters, we don’t ever have to tire because~ with the strength of a Hero and the love of a Savior, He will continue writing His love story. Our story. And we can rest in knowing that when we hear the final “The End” His smile will light up our hearts because we will be in His presence. Our story will have a happy ending if we will just allow Him to finish it for us. His love story called Faith.
5/15/2019
Sleepless Nights Of A MamaSLEEPLESS NIGHTS OF A MAMA
We lived 700 miles away. Away from all family. I felt very alone. I didn’t have many friends, mostly just acquaintances. And I was tired. So tired. Mom wasn’t there to give me a break and Mike worked 6 days a week. Our firstborn was almost a year old and I hadn’t slept through a single night in over a year. Not only had my uncomfortable, huge belly kept me awake before her birth, but after her birth she woke up (and stayed up) several times a night. Every single night. We tried everything. I cried more than I care to admit. Sheer exhaustion took over and I can remember thinking that I would give anything, anything for one night of uninterrupted sleep. I couldn’t complain to anyone. The only phones we had were land lines and it was far too expensive to call home. There were no cell phones. There was no texting. There was no one to vent to. So I turned to the only One I had in my loneliness. I complained to God. I cried out to Him and I finally admitted to the ladies at my church that I needed prayer. I was not super mom. I needed them to reach out to God on my behalf. Once I gave it to God, once I leaned totally on Him and told Him I couldn’t do it anymore, He told me~ “I can Charisse, I can do it for you.” He whispered to my lonely, exhausted heart that I wasn’t alone and that I needed to trust Him through this. It was then that I realized I had not been trusting. I had been feeling sorry for myself in my loneliness and sleep deprivation. I might have called out to Him in frustration and despair, but not in faith and trust. So to all of you moms that are wondering~’How can I get through these baby years without losing my mind?’ The sleepless nights, the terrible two’s, (or terrible teens), the empty nest or even the adult years of our children.... You can’t. But He can. Let go of the frustration and despair and give it to God. Once I truly did this I realized I was never really alone. When the world was dark and everyone was asleep, as I held her and cried~ He was right there by my side the whole time. His strength is limitless when we have no strength left at all. Three more babies came after my first. There were many more sleepless nights. A lot of crying. Too much of Charisse and not enough of Christ. Thank God, His mercies are new every morning. He is faithful and even now when the sleepless nights of crying over my adult children may come, when the world is dark and I’m holding their problems in my heart, I can rest in Him, trusting that I am not alone and neither are they. He is right there by their side. Deuteronomy 31:8 Psalm 121:2-3 💗 DEAR MOTHER IN LAW
DEAR DAUGHTER IN LAW.... There once was a little boy that captured my heart. From the very first moment he was placed in my arms and his big blue eyes stared up into mine. I held him there. So close. He had this heart that was full of compassion. Always thinking of me. He would bring me flowers and write me love notes. I was the world to him. He would promise never to marry or move away. And I held him there. So close. As he grew, his compassion never waned. Sweet notes and cards. Thoughtfulness. He shared his dreams with me. His funny moments and his happiness. Maybe, he mused, he would marry.... but live right next door. He would never move....too far away. And I tried to hold him there. So close. But then one day he was asking for advice. His compassion and thoughtfulness shifted. Advice on what to write... to her. Again I tried to hold him there. So close. As he talked, I stared into the eyes of my little boy. My baby, now a man. He would marry her. He would live anywhere in the world if he could be with her, because she was his world. And I was not. I could no longer hold him there, so close. I had to let go. She changed everything. She was his everything. His happiness. His life. She brought him joy just by being herself. And she brought me joy because she was herself. She wrote me notes filled with love. She shared their dreams with me, their days, their hopes, their heartaches and their happiness. She shared their laughter with me. She sent me pictures he didn’t know she took. She told me each time he spoke loving thoughts of home and mom. Each time.💗💗 She shared him. And she allowed me to hold him close again. So close. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Remember the heart that held his first. That heard his first words of love. That taught him to walk and talk and be the man you love, the man you married. Remember the heart that holds his now. That gives him joy and happiness. That loves him more than you ever could have hoped for. The woman he married. Remember.... and hold each other close. Thank you Shannon. I love you 😘❤️ WHEN “GOD WON’T GIVE YOU MORE THAN YOU CAN HANDLE” DOESN’T CUT IT.
I’ve been accused of living in a bubble. It used to upset me and I’d feel the need to defend myself. I watch the news. I know what’s going on in the world. Tragedy has hit home in my own life on more than one occasion. I know and understand the suffering of others. But maybe, just maybe my blog has become a bubble of pet answers and cute cliches, and I truly wasn’t seeing the deep despair some are living with on a daily basis. What answers do I give to those who feel as if they have no hope? How can I tell a mother that her children will be okay when that mother is facing debilitating heartache and despair in her own life? How can I speak words of hope to those who know all those same words, and still can’t grasp that hope? “God doesn’t give us more than we can handle” doesn’t cut it. So what do I say? I don’t know. I don’t have all the answers. As desperately as I want to, I can’t write some cute cliche that will answer all the heartache and pain you are going through. The only answer I have, the only answer I can cling to is this~ God loves you. When life is at its darkest, when those we love the most in this world have failed us~ failed us in a way that breaks us to the point we think there can be no return, God loves us. He is the only One Who loves us unconditionally~with grace and mercy. With power. With hope. With strength. With compassion and with comfort. And when there isn’t anything else left to cling to~ we cling to Him. When the pain is so deep we don’t have words left to say~we just ask Him to hold us and keep loving us because that’s all we have left in our emptiness. And we can know that He will never leave us. He will never forsake us. He will keep loving us amidst the anger we feel for the circumstances life has thrown at us. He will keep loving us when we stop believing He does. He will keep loving us when we can’t pray. When we have lost all faith. When we can’t function. When we can’t stop the tears from flowing. He will keep loving us. Cling to Him as He holds on to you. He won’t ever let go. Everything and everyone will eventually disappoint. But God. When you feel like there’s nothing left in this world to trust in~ trust this~ the One Who gave His only Son for you because of His unfathomable, indescribable, unending love ~ THAT love belongs to you. It is all yours. It wraps around your heart and soul and holds you when you think you can’t go on. God will never stop loving you. And if that is all we have left in this world, It is enough. |
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