4/19/2024
How To Know God’s WillI sat on my bed in the darkness and had a talk with God. My tears seemed to mimic the weather, as the rain beat against my windows. I had been wrestling with a certain prayer request for a very long time and until today, I felt overwhelming confusion. It was always on my mind. I was constantly searching God’s word and begging for an answer. I was scared. I didn’t want to make the wrong decision. I wanted God’s will.
How do we know what God’s will is? There are times when it’s an easy answer. Black and white. You get in His word. If the request in question goes against what God’s word clearly teaches, that’s your answer. But there are some things that are just plain hard and unclear. And that’s where I found myself. And in the process, I found myself slowly giving up. In the battle, I got tired. I didn’t want to fight. I wanted to stop trying to figure it out. I became melancholy and slowly, satan tried to convince me that the easy route was the only route. But THE Holy Spirit dwells within me! Christ’s power rests on me and even though I may have felt done physically, God was not done. His Spirit continued to whisper to my heart that I needed to seek wisdom. I did not have my answer yet. And so I did. Whenever the question came to mind, I begged God for wisdom. That was all I could do. Today my husband expressed his concerns. He noticed the melancholy state I was in, even though I thought I was hiding it well. I argued with his assumption but when he left for the day, I got into God’s word again and God’s word got into me. And after months of confusion, in His time He answered. And I knew. I had a peace. And that’s when the tears fell. Too often I find myself trying to figure life out in the flesh. My flesh is so weak. I worry and wonder more than I pray. I had to completely let go of me. I had to keep seeking God until He answered. Oswald Chambers said it so eloquently~ “The weakest saint can experience the power of the Deity of the Son of God if once he is willing to let go. The power IS the Holy Ghost, not something He imparts. No power on earth or in hell can conquer the Spirit of God in a human spirit. It is unconquerable. Don’t cave in because you have been baffled. Get at it again. Stand committed to God.” God knew that I needed to read that today. He knew I needed to read the exact verses He gave me this morning. Through this process, when seeking God’s will I have found: 1. In the weakness of my flesh, I can be tempted to give up, but God never does. He never gives up on us. 2. If you want to know God’s will, you must know God. It is of utmost importance that we hide His word in our hearts daily. Stay in His word. 3. Because of the battle, my prayers have been constant, my faith has increased and my strength has been renewed. All in God’s beautiful timing. Don’t stop praying, don’t stop seeking, don’t stop asking! 4. God’s love has completely and utterly overwhelmed me. Again. 5. I will continually glorify Him. And so in the quiet of my bedroom as the rain and tears fell, He sat there on the bed with me. He listened. And He answered. As cliche as this might sound, the rain stopped and the sun came out. I don’t think that’s a coincidence, and I don’t take it for granted. He is such a great God. I don’t know why God has us wait for His answer, but I do know that He knows~ and that’s all that matters. Not only did I have peace, He strengthened my faith and refreshed my soul. He gave me His answer and I was ready for the fight. SCRIPTURE READING: 1 Thessalonians 5:17, Acts 17:11, John 5:39, Romans 8:9, 1 Corinthians 6:19, 2 Corinthians 12:9, John 14:16, 26&27, James 1:5, Matthew 26:41, Philippians 1:6, 1 John 5:14-15, 20, Psalm 119:10-11, Ephesians 3:16-21, Romans 1:17, 1 Chronicles 16:11, Psalm 31:24, Colossians 1:11, John 11:22, Matthew 7:7-8, Psalm 70:4, Psalm 86:12, Hebrews 13:15, 1 Timothy 6:12
4/5/2024
The Only One Who MattersI was asked to pray over my daughter-in-law at a recent baby shower our family held in her honor.
Talking out loud to God used to be an issue for me. In group settings I would focus more on what I was going to say when it was my turn to pray, than on the prayers already being said. I’m embarrassed to admit that because I worried so much about how others perceived me, I avoided praying out loud. I always ended up calling on someone else to pray during my ladies Bible studies at church. God gently showed me that I was making prayer all about me. I wanted to be perceived as a godly prayer warrior, and too often I was going through the motions instead of simply talking to my God. Once my eyes were opened, praying in public became sweet because I knew Jesus was sitting right there with me, and that was all that mattered. I was talking to Him alone. And so, the baby shower… If you have been here a while, you know that my son and his wife could not get pregnant for years. It was a sorrowful heaviness that was almost too much to bear. But God!! God performed breathtaking miracles in their lives, and our precious baby Noelle is due in May. A myriad of emotions were felt as I began to pray for my daughter-in-law, and attempted to glorify God in that moment. My mind knew what I was trying to communicate, but my mouth did not. Suddenly I was the blubbering, tongue tied mother-in-law. The tears came and to be honest, I don’t even know what I prayed. What I do know is this. As I struggled to mouth the words my heart felt, I paused and remembered I was talking to my heavenly Daddy. In that moment it was as if it was only He and I, and I felt His love wrap around me, and Shannon, and baby Noelle. I had a complete peace that God knew my heart. He knew my thoughts. He knew the love I felt for Him in that moment and the joy He had given me. He knew I wanted to glorify. And so, I let the tears fall and I just talked to Him. If you have ever felt like I have when it comes to public prayer, or maybe you have even felt that way in private, please let me assure you that our amazing Heavenly Father does not want you to feel that way. Jesus is alive and real. Our Heavenly Father isn’t some far away, out of touch God up in the sky. He is right there next to you. In your midst and in your heart. You are talking to the Kings of Kings. What a beautiful thing that is. Our God, who holds the oceans in His hands, yet bends down to listen to the small cries of our pleading souls. The Creator of the stars. The Father who keeps every one of your tears in His bottle. Who knows of every sand on the sea shore yet every hair on your head. He is the Father who is talking to you!! Hearing even the thoughts you cannot utter. Laughing with you. Crying with you. Feeling every emotion, and reassuring you of His love. So sweet friend~Just talk to Him. Nothing fancy. Just you and Jesus. Because when you’re talking to Jesus, He is the only one who matters. ❤️ SCRIPTURE READING: Matthew 18:20 Ephesians 3:17-19 Philippians 4:7 Psalm 44:21 I Samuel 16:7 Psalm 139:1-2,4,6 Psalm 16:11 Isaiah 40:12 Luke 12:6-7 Psalm 139:17-18 Romans 8:26-27 John 10:29 Psalm 56:8 Hebrews 4:15-16 I John 4:16, 18-19 Jeremiah 29:12-13 Psalm 116:1-2
3/8/2024
He Knows You BetterAs I sat crying, I wondered how my mind could be so powerful, and yet so weak. It has the power to convince me of lies, and then the weakness to believe those lies.
Even though I know God knows everything about me, even though I know He knows my every thought, in my weakness I try to be strong. I realized today that I haven’t been an open book with God lately. As I prayed, my mind told me that I should not say “those words” out loud to Him. I dare not complain. I dare not list the thousand and one things that weigh me down, emotionally and spiritually. Because~ “That’s not what a good Christian does when they pray. Certainly God doesn’t want to be bothered with my petty problems, or pain from the past that I so easily succumb to.” You know me. I’ve written several posts about pouring your heart out to God. I have an easy time bringing all the big things to Him in prayer, but sometimes I don’t think to bring Him all the little things as well. And without me realizing, the little things continue to pile up on top of the big things. Suddenly I feel buried. Somehow I convinced myself that I shouldn’t expose my humanness to Him. He would be so disappointed. I have to push those thoughts aside. I have to fight the good fight. How silly of me. How weak of me to think I somehow have that power to hide those thoughts from God. I may not express them, but He knows every single one of them. And so, today I told him ALL of it. As each thing came to mind (and there were A LOT of “things”), I talked to Him about it. At times, I felt like a failure. So weak. How did I get to this place? This place of melancholy and lack of joy. This place of feeling burdened, misunderstood and alone. My heart already knew how. Because I never talked to Him about it to begin with. I just kept “trying”. Trying to be good in my own strength. Trying to tell myself that this is not how a Pastor’s wife and christian blogger should think. “Trying” in our humanness is pride. Pride because somehow we think we can do this life without God, even if it’s a life that we think honors Him. Without Him, we are nothing. And ladies, today as I poured out my heart~all my failures, all my thoughts, all my weaknesses and selfish motives and all my fears~ God was with me. He sat with me as I cried, and His word reminded me that He already knew all of my heart before I ever chose to reveal it to Him. He had been waiting for me to do just that. And once I did, my heart felt free. Through the tears I praised Him. I praised Him for never giving up on me. I praised Him for saving my soul. I praised Him for all the blessings in my life. I praised Him for listening and loving me. I praised Him for the peace that came over me and the joy that He restored. I praised Him for always giving me a word from His word, exactly what I need every single time. I praised Him for His grace. Ladies, don’t ever be embarrassed to talk to God. Don’t ever think you have to have it all together before you can come to Him, or that somehow you have to hide your true feelings as you talk to Him. We might not always know how to process our humanness and the emotions we are feeling, but God does~ so why do we even try to figure it out on our own? He knows you far better than you know you. Cast all your cares on Him, never forgetting how very much He cares for you. His grace will always, always be sufficient for exactly what we need. SCRIPTURE READING: Psalm 38:8-10, 15 Psalm 39:7 Psalm 40:1-3, 5, 16 Psalm 55:22 Psalm 116:1-2 Psalm 139:1-12 Matthew 11:28 1 Peter 5:7 2 Corinthians 12:9 Galatians 5:1 Isaiah 58:6, 8-9 John 15:4-5, 11
1/26/2024
Your Child’s In BetweenYOUR CHILD’S “IN BETWEEN”.
When I recall my early childhood, I wish that I could adequately express all the beautiful emotions and joy I feel, then wrap up those words and give that gift to all of you. I feel the same emotions and joy when I recall raising my own children. Words cannot describe it. Every moment wasn’t perfect. A lot of being a mama was messy, but all of it was beautiful. And it still is. I read a verse this week that really spoke to my heart. “As one whom his mother comforts, so will I comfort you.” Isaiah 66:13. It stopped me in my tracks. God was comparing the comfort He gives to that of a mother’s. He didn’t say His comfort was greater, He said it was just like a mother’s. That is pretty profound. What a significant role a mama plays in the lives of her children. Something a child doesn’t truly understand until they are in that role themselves. When I was little, I vividly remember wanting to grow up and be just like my mom. To me, she was perfect in every way. Even now, at 58 when I think about my childhood, my memories are filled with joy and comfort and love. It was a precious piece of my life. After I became a mom, I realized what a precious time it was for my mom as well. When I got a little older, I don’t ever remember a time that I didn’t want my mom to be around, or that I felt embarrassed by her presence. I also never remember my thoughts voicing the opinion that I hated her. But then, I became a senior in high school and that relationship changed. I most definitely was NOT living for the Lord. I did some things I’m not proud of. My mom would try to talk to me, but all I remember thinking was~ “She just doesn’t understand.” I’m sure the things I did wouldn’t seem significant to the outside world, but inside I knew my heart was dangerously far from God. I wanted to run away. I wanted to lock myself in my room. I wanted to be far away from my mom. That mama that I wanted to grow up to be. That mama who filled my childhood with joy and comfort and love. It was a phase where I felt completely misunderstood. When my own teenagers became seniors in high school, I realized how very much my mom truly understood, and how very much she loved me. With every year that passed, there was a new phase of motherhood where realizations hit me. Realizations that my own mother had gone through the same things with me. Sadly I am still realizing, but it’s too late to tell her that now I understand. My mom has been gone for 20 years. At times I cannot even wrap my head around that fact. 20 years of realizations that could not be rectified. I’m not going to pretend that everything between us was perfect when she passed away. We still had our issues, but my understanding of many of those issues has changed with every passing year. And today, even at 58 I long for that comfort that only my mom could give. We sow and we reap and we go through the “in between” with our children, praying that one day they will get it. One day they will understand. My heart aches for the mama who is going through that “in between”. My heart aches for the child who doesn’t realize and may not realize until their mama is gone. How can we avoid the “in between” our children go through? From the awe and love they have, to disrespect and disregard, and then finally~the understanding. It’s so hard. Sometimes that “in between” can take years. And our mama hearts break. How can this be prevented? Sadly, sometimes it can’t. Sadly we can raise our children to the best of our abilities, in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. We can teach them to love Jesus with their everything. We can pray with them, lead by example, take them to church and yet somehow satan’s lies become bigger than a mama’s love and steal that child like innocence away. What’s left for a mama to do? What’s left when we feel like we’ve lost them? What’s left when they scream at us that we just “don’t understand”, and our hearts are crying to tell them that they are the ones who don’t understand? What’s left when we feel like we need a miracle? Jesus. Jesus is that miracle. And so, we pour our hearts out to Him and we don’t stop. I am living proof of prayer through the “in between”. My husband is living proof of prayer through the “in between”. My children are living proof of prayer through the “in between”. No matter how long it has been, no matter how long it takes, no matter how old they are, I am here to tell you mama~ don’t give up hope. Hope in the Holy Spirit to grab a hold of your child’s heart and hand, and lead them out of the “in between” and back to that tiny part of their child like heart. Back to you. Back to God. God’s comfort and love are more powerful than satan’s lies. Your comfort and love are more powerful than satan’s lies. He may fool for the moment, but their hearts will eventually remember and return. They will remember your prayers. They will remember your love. They will remember your comfort. The comfort that compares to God’s. Hold on to that truth, because that truth is power. SCRIPTURE READING: Ephesians 4:14-15 Ephesians 6:1-4 Philippians 4:6-7 Proverbs 22:6 Deuteronomy 6:5-7 1 Thessalonians 5:14 1 Thessalonians 5:17 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 Isaiah 66:13
12/1/2023
God With UsI’m rushing around making the lists, baking the cookies, wrapping the presents, decorating the tree, shopping for gifts, listening to the carols~
And all the while He sits there watching. I don’t stop to talk to Him. Even though He is right there, in the room with me. If I could physically see Him, I would not ignore him. I would fall on my knees. I would stop and talk to Him, and cry with Him, and laugh with Him. I would tell Him how much I miss my loved ones, how excited I am for new grand babies… and how burdened I am for so many of you. He would put His arms around me, and peace would wash over me. I would sing the carols with Him. He would help me decorate the tree, and finish the shopping, and baking, and wrapping and it would be so fun. His presence would fill the room with warmth and light, laughter and joy, and I would fight to keep the tears of happiness from spilling down my cheeks. Every burden lifted. Every tear wiped away. Emmanuel. God with us. And we would sit by the fire at the end of the day and reminisce about memories old, and memories yet to be made. I would talk and talk, and He would quietly listen. And after it all, He would tell me how very much He loves me. I would fall asleep there in His presence, with complete peace~ knowing that everything was right with the world. Why isn’t this our reality? This Christmas let’s change that. Because it can be our reality~ if we so choose. He sits there watching, yet we don’t stop to talk to Him. He is in every room with us as we do every task, as we fret and stress to get it all done. He whispers to our very hearts this Christmas~ Come, give me every burden and I will give you rest. Every tear wiped away. Where warmth and light, laughter and joy fills every room, And all is right with the world. Emmanuel. God with us. “Thou wilt shew me the path of life: In thy presence is fulness of joy; At thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore.” Psalm 16:11
11/17/2023
Time FliesHow can it be Thanksgiving already?
The nostalgia of the season has come upon me. I’m missing my loved ones. My grandparents, my parents, my best friend~ all gone on to heaven. I’m missing family gatherings full of aunts and uncles and cousins. I’m missing my children being tiny little beings full of giggles, and cuddles, and adoration. I’m missing the past. The music, the decorations, the food and the memories. When I was younger I was often told that time is fleeting. I didn’t really grasp the weight of those words, but as each year passes, that weight gets heavier and heavier. With the beautiful falling leaves painting the barren earth, this truth hits me even harder. I watch each colorful leaf dance in the wind…and then blow away, and I think about the years of my life doing the same. Like a vapor. The wind takes the years. I try to grasp at them and hold them tighter. I don’t want to let them go. I don’t want to see my grandsons turn into little men so quickly, or my granddaughters into young women. I am selfish. I want them to stay their tiny selves just a little bit longer. My children grew up too quickly. And now my grandchildren are doing the same. I remember last year, and the year before that… I had purposed in my heart to savor every minute. To slow down and enjoy the time with my children and their children. And I did. I stopped the busy. I stopped putting my housework, my schedule and my to do’s before family. I dropped everything at a moment’s notice to spend more time with the most important people in my life. I cherished every single minute. And yet, it did not make time slow down. Time was caught up in the wind. It danced and it was beautiful, and then it was gone. And so, I am that grandma talking about time fleeting to my children. Telling my daughters to cherish every minute. To look into the eyes of their children and soak it in. To burn that moment onto her heart, because that moment will never come again. It will dance and be beautiful, and then~ it will become a memory. I’ll be honest, as I pondered these thoughts this morning, I was saddened. My eyes filled with tears. I’m sure my mom passing away at only 63 plays a part in that. I am only 5 years from that very age. And so, as I often do, I cried to Jesus. I shared my heart. And as I opened His word I told Him how incredibly thankful I was for this beautiful life He has given me…”But oh Jesus, it’s going by too fast. It’s disappearing before my eyes!” And my heart didn’t feel as thankful. It felt heavy. It will be Thanksgiving and then Christmas and then a New Year, and time will dance away from me like the beautiful leaves outside. And just like He always does, Jesus gave me a word from His word. “For my days are consumed like smoke, And my bones are burned as an hearth. My days are like a shadow that declineth; And I am withered like grass. But thou, O LORD, shalt endure for ever; And thy remembrance unto all generations. This shall be written for the generation to come: And the people which shall be created shall praise the LORD. Of old hast thou laid the foundation of the earth: And the heavens are the work of thy hands. They shall perish, but thou shalt endure: Yea, all of them shall wax old like a garment; As a vesture shalt thou change them, and they shall be changed: But thou art the same, and thy years shall have no end. The children of thy servants shall continue, And their seed shall be established before thee.” Psalm 102:3, 11-12, 18, 25-28 “Like as a father pitieth his children, So the LORD pitieth them that fear him. For he knoweth our frame; He remembereth that we are dust. As for man, his days are as grass: As a flower of the field, so he flourisheth. For the wind passeth over it, and it is gone; And the place thereof shall know it no more. But the mercy of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting upon them that fear him, And his righteousness unto children's children; To such as keep his covenant, And to those that remember his commandments to do them. The LORD hath prepared his throne in the heavens; And his kingdom ruleth over all. Bless the LORD, ye his angels, that excel in strength, That do his commandments, hearkening unto the voice of his word. Bless ye the LORD, all ye his hosts; Ye ministers of his, that do his pleasure. Bless the LORD, all his works in all places of his dominion: Bless the LORD, O my soul.” Psalm 103:13-22 The words leapt off the page. In that moment, the knowledge of God’s love for me transcended any words I might have had to try to convey the feelings of my heart. God knew exactly what I needed before I ever opened my Bible. And He told me~ My Jesus is eternal. He does not leave. He remains beautiful. Always present. Always with me. Life may change daily, fleeting and only leaving me memories, but my Jesus will never become just a memory, because my Jesus never changes. He is the same yesterday, today and forever. My constant. My joy. My truth. My life. And as I strive to glorify Him in all I do, as I strive to live that life in front of my children and grandchildren, teaching them to make Him their everything~ He promises me that my children and my children’s children will be established and His mercy and righteousness will be upon them. And my heart is overwhelmed with thanksgiving. It feels as if it could burst for the joy He has given me. The weight of the words that felt so heavy just a few moments before, now gave me promise. Yes, time is fleeting but Christ is my firm foundation. My cornerstone. A foundation that will never be moved. He is my forever. The joy He brings will never, ever, ever leave. It will dance and be beautiful. And it will remain. For me, for my children, and for my children’s children. Thank you Jesus. Happy Thanksgiving dear friends! SCRIPTURE READING: Psalm 126:2-3, 5-6 Hebrews 13:8 1 Corinthians 3:11 Hebrews 11:10 2 Timothy 2:19 1 Peter 2:6 Ephesians 2:18, 20 1 Corinthians 2:9
11/10/2023
My Great GodSometimes the hope we need for miracles in our own lives, come from the miracles and praises of others.
This is the season we will see countless posts and quotes about thankfulness. Why to be grateful and how to be thankful. They are all great reminders, but today I am not going to talk about any of them. Today I’m going to share some hope. Today I’m going to talk about my Jesus, and tell you how great our God is. Ever since my dad passed away in 2020, my heart has struggled with holding on and letting go. Letting go of his belongings (right down to a little magnifying glass he used to read his prescriptions), letting go of his home, and holding on to memories. Every time I thought about selling his home, I cried. I couldn’t. It was a heavy, internal struggle to say the least. So I prayed. And I prayed, and I prayed and I prayed, and I never felt a peace, and I never got an answer. My son and daughter in law were living there during this time. It made my heart happy that family lived within the walls that held so many memories for me, so I continually pushed the idea of selling all the way to the back of my mind… until the day they told us they were moving. I’ll be honest. I cried. And then I prayed some more. God had opened a door for my son that was literally a miracle. A dream house for them to be able to purchase. Something they had been praying about for a very long time themselves. And yet, in that moment I struggled. While they were getting their dream, I wanted to hold on to mine. Keeping a physical part of my dad for as long as possible. God continued to nudge my heart though, so I continued to pray. I remember telling one of my children that I wished God would just audibly tell me what to do. Don’t you feel that way sometimes? I was scared. I didn’t want to let go. I pondered all these things. I didn’t even talk to my husband about it. It was a Saturday in August when it was particularly heavy on my heart. An answer needed to come. The home would soon be empty and the mortgage was high. I begged God that day to show me. I asked him for specifics. An exact request. The entire day went by without an answer and late that night, when I thought no answer had come, God surprised me. He literally answered the exact request I had prayed for. I cried again. I don’t believe God speaks audibly to us, but in that moment it was as close to audible as you can get. He used His word. He used prayer. He used other believers. His Holy Spirit worked miracles through it all. This might seem trivial to you, but it was heart wrenching to me. Until God answered. And suddenly, the peace He gave me passed all understanding. A peace that could only come from Him. God was telling me to sell. Let me tell you what happened within the next 24 hours. We had 2 people interested in buying. And then, early Sunday morning I remembered that a friend of mine had asked me a year ago if I would be willing to sell. At the time I told her no. As a quick gesture, I let her know that I was now willing. Three interested people before we ever listed! And just like that, 24 hours later, my dad’s home sold for our asking price. Not only did it sell, it sold to my sweet friend. She was just as happy as I was, and told me that she had been praying about it! I couldn’t imagine anyone else living there and loving it like my dad did. God put her name on my heart that Sunday morning. Not only that, but my son and daughter told us they were expecting. After 5 heartbreaking years of trying, and praying and begging God, their miracle baby was here. They had a dream home and a baby coming. And I wept and I wept and I wept. God’s perfect timing was an understatement. And today I want to praise him. Today I want to thank him. Today I want to give you hope~don’t stop praying and seeking and asking and begging… And praising and thanking. He truly is our God of miracles. He is my Father who understands my frail humanity and has compassion on my hurting heart. Who sympathizes with my inconsequential struggling and fear, in the midst of a world filled with far worse. And despite the innumerable prayers lifted up to Him from all over this world, He cares about me. He continually reaches down and pulls me close, whispering to my heart that He understands. That’s my God. As hard as it is when you’re going through the process, don’t give up on Him. He knows exactly when to answer those prayers. Nothing is too big. Nothing is too small. And when the answer comes, and it will come, thank Him. Praise Him. And then, share that hope with the world. SCRIPTURE READING: Isaiah 12:2 Psalm 86:1-10, 12-13, 15 Psalm 88:1-3, 9, 13 Psalm 89:1-2, 5-8, 15-17 Ephesians 1:3-7, 12, 18-19
10/27/2023
A Look In The MirrorThis morning I realized that once again~amidst the chaos of life~ I have been seeking God only for His blessings, and not seeking God for God Himself.
Often we look at the word “blessings” and think about gifts, but God’s blessings come in many forms. In the ability to bring the needs of others to Him. In asking Him to give us wisdom on our path ahead. In countless prayers throughout our days. Yes, prayer is a huge blessing and lately, amid my rushed mornings my prayers have consisted of quick requests before starting my day. I wanted something from God without spending quality time with God. But to truly know, love and seek Him~ that takes intention. It takes stillness. It takes the daily “to do” list out of the equation. It’s a blank slate and a heart seeking Jesus alone. No agenda. This is something that seems to be a recurring issue with me. Life gets ahead of God. I can’t seem to turn my brain off to focus on Him, so I utter some quick requests and go about my day. Please don’t misunderstand, I realize there are times that the busyness of life is completely out of our control, and in those moments all we can do is utter quick prayers to our Heavenly Father, but that hasn’t been my case. Yes life has been busy, but I have put many things before God. When I do this, His fruits seem to whither quickly and I feel farther and farther away from Him. Fruits like love, joy, peace, long suffering etc. I notice myself getting irritable, and judgmental, overwhelmed and discouraged. I feel sorry for myself, I don’t think about others like I should. My identity in my Jesus becomes my identity in Charisse alone. Just last week I had set up facial recognition on my phone. The very next morning it didn’t recognize me. As I stumbled into the bathroom in my sleepy state, I muttered “stupid phone”. Then I looked in the mirror. Sometimes I think we all need to take a good long look in the mirror. When I get to the point where even my phone irritates me, I don’t recognize Jesus’ reflection looking back at me. I simply see Charisse. Grumpy Charisse. I need that time with Jesus. To push the world aside and just be wrapped in His presence. It’s in those moments that my love for Him grows stronger and my fruits bear His name. This reminded me of a beautiful memory from year’s past. My husband coached soccer at our local public school for 15 years. One year stands out to me more than all the others. It was almost Christmas. The soccer season was over, but one night there was a knock on our door. The captain of the team stood outside with a gift for my husband. The team had gotten together and purchased a beautiful soccer jacket with the word “coach” stitched on the front. A sweet, thoughtful, out-of-the-norm gesture that was completely uncharacteristic of high school boys. A lot of love was wrapped up in that special gift. Later that year at the sports awards ceremony, that group of “cool, popular” boys stood on the platform and weeped as they expressed their love for my husband. Just recalling these memories brings the tears. Many teachers told my husband later that they had never seen anything Iike it. My husband was their coach. He taught them the lessons they needed to win. Those lessons weren’t always easy but those boys knew that my husband loved them and wanted the best for them~ because they spent so much time with him. Their hearts were changed because of it. They asked nothing of him, yet spending time in his presence taught them so much. And it showed. Love was reflected in them. That’s what I want. My love for Jesus to be reflected back to a world that desperately needs Him just as much as I do. If you find yourself feeling far from God, irritable and judgmental, overwhelmed or discouraged~ maybe it’s time to push the “to-do’s” aside, intentionally spending time with Jesus, for no other reason than to just be with Him. That’s a beautiful place to be. SCRIPTURE READING: Isaiah 26:9 Psalm 63:1-8 John 15:4-5, 8-9, 11 Ephesians 3:16-19 Psalm 143:6, 8 Psalm 42:1-2, 8
10/7/2023
Peace Be StillI barely came up for air when another wave crashed down upon me.
There had been a respite. I felt His peace, and relief swept over me. Trials seemed to be eased, and prayers answered. Until this week. It wasn’t a horrible diagnosis, a job loss or a death. It was a small attack of satan in the middle of the night as I slept peacefully, completely unaware. For the second time in a week, my Facebook account was hacked. Not only was it hacked, but the person posing as me posted evil pictures on my page, and in a chat. I woke up to a notification on my phone. Facebook told me I had violated their policies and I was locked out. I was sick inside. I couldn’t do anything about it. I couldn’t even defend myself. I couldn’t tell any of you, or ask for prayer. I felt so confused inside. Was this Satan attacking me, or God trying to teach me something? I prayed all day. I also tried to refute the issue, and somehow defend myself in order to get control back of my page. But at the end of the day, my weary heart realized it wasn’t in my control at all. It actually never was. And honestly, Meta may think they have control, but God has the final say. So I had to ask myself~ do I have enough faith to trust Him through this? What if Holding Hope disappeared? What if 12,000 followers became 1 and I had to start all over? What if I couldn’t use this platform to reach others again? What if God was saying “no” to me, would that be ok? What if the “busy” things I was complaining about in my heart last week were my reality this week? I am not questioning God. I am asking Him for discernment and wisdom to know why this is happening. I am checking my own heart for sin. I am asking God to overcome the wicked one, and the darkness that seemed to have won. It’s incredibly hard for me to be able to read the comments on my posts, comments asking for prayer or saying things are hard right now~and I am unable to respond. I am unable to encourage. But, encouragement won’t end with me. If my page were to end today, God is faithful. He will send others to those in need of encouragement. I am reminded of my words from last week again. I am not God. God will be God, with or without me, and He will get the glory. Satan may have attacked, but God has taught me so much in just a few short days. He is my light in the darkness. His light will continue to shine and He will prevail. And if I am able, that is the message I want to leave with you. Whatever you are facing today, continue to pray through it. That is literally all I can do right now. Continue to check your own heart. Continue to ask God for wisdom and discernment. Continue to fight that darkness with Jesus’ light. Even if you were falsely accused. Even if you can’t defend yourself. Even if you feel all is lost. Even when it looks like Satan has won and the winds and waves are just too much to bear, remember~ our God walks on water and our God walks on the wings of the wind. Our God is light in that darkness. Our God always makes a way. This morning I came back up for air and the winds and the waves did not overcome. I could hear His very words~Peace be still. And so I wait. As I write this I am still locked out, but I’m not alone. God is in complete control. None of this came as a surprise to Him. You are not alone either. You are never alone. God is with you. His light will shine through your darkness. He will calm the storms around you and He will prevail when all seems lost. Even in the unknown~The battle has already been won my friends, and Jesus is our Victor!! SCRIPTURE READING: Psalm 139:11-12 Psalm 34:4, 6, 8, 15, 17, 19, 22 1 Corinthians 10:13 Psalm 35:1-2, 7, 9-12, 15-23, 25, 27-28 Psalm 36:5, 7, 9-11 Psalm 37:1, 3-7, 23-26, 32-33, 35-36, 39-40 Psalm 104:3 Mark 4:39-40 Matthew 14:25, 27, 30-33 1 Corinthians 15:57 Romans 8:37 2 Corinthians 2:14 Deuteronomy 20:4 Romans 8:31 John 16:33 Isaiah 55:11 Why does life feel like a chore to me?
That was my first thought the other morning. I was tired before I even got out of bed. Not wanting to escape the warmth, I laid there thinking back to a time when I used to wake up excited about the day ahead. What happened to that girl? I thought I had it all figured out. I told myself there was just too much on my plate. Too much busyness. Too much weariness. My mind felt like there were a thousand things going on all at once, and I couldn’t make it stop. I wanted it to stop. It was exhausting me. How do I find myself here again? I don’t know how many blog posts I’ve written on this subject, and yet I fall prey to its defeat again and again. Google tells me we have anywhere from 60,000-80,000 thoughts a day. We have 6-7 thoughts per minute. 95% of our thoughts are repetitive, and 80% are negative. Why is that? What feeds that negativity? The world tells me busy is better. It chides me to do it all. I work part time from home. I also have a stitching business. I over stress trying to be a good wife, mom and pastor’s wife. I hold Bible studies and ladies meetings. I schedule and teach and study and pray. I write a blog and run a Facebook page. I create more content, to gain more followers, to encourage more ladies, to have more hope. But somehow along the way, I continually seem to lose my own hope under a pile of busy. And that’s when the devil tells me that I am failing. He convinces me that I don’t want to be a pastor’s wife with ministry responsibilities, I just want to be a plain old wife. I don’t want to create posts or write a devotional every single week. I just want to scroll and be fed by someone else. I just want to be me. I just want to not have to think. And I will be honest ladies, that morning I told God ALL of that. I tried telling Him that I am a homebody, an empathetic introvert who wears other’s heartaches on her sleeve. “Don’t you know this is all too much for me?” I asked. As if He doesn’t know me. And that’s when the Holy Spirit revealed to me that my thoughts had gained control over my heart. My busy schedule and commitments overwhelm my soul. What “new” message of hope I can give to my followers constantly captures my thoughts. The heartache of others is continually on my mind. I find myself thinking about ALL of these things more than I think about GOD Himself. In fact, I’m sure it would be safe to say that 80% of my thoughts are “busy” thoughts, maybe more. That means only 20% of my thoughts are being still with God and thinking about Him. And therein lies the problem. Life has become a chore because I’m not dwelling in His presence and it’s only in His presence that there is fullness of joy. I am trying to be God, instead of resting in Him, surrendering all my thoughts, and days, and moments to Him. I was “taking the yoke”, but I forgot about the “learning” part. That morning Jesus told me~”Take my yoke upon you and LEARN of ME. If you do this Charisse, you will find rest for your soul.” When will I learn? Probably never, this side of heaven. But I sure am thankful for a God who doesn’t give up on me. His mercies are new every morning. The busy won’t ever stop. Life is filled with it. It will continue to pile up, but instead of being under that weight~ we can be on top of it, if we will just learn from God. What have I learned? Here are just a few takeaways~ *To wake up and rejoice before I get out of bed, thanking God immediately for the day ahead, and all He has blessed me with. *Pray about everything, all day long. If a thought comes into my head and I start trying to figure out my own solution, I’ve got to stop. I have to pray about it, because let’s be honest~ God’s solutions are so much better. When I do this continually it helps me to cease from “Charisse’s” works and focus on God. That’s when I find rest. *I meditate on God’s words throughout the day. When I think on God’s words, it pushes the busy right out of my brain. My thoughts are on God, and His peace tells me that He is in control and will take care of whatever has me stressed, anxious, heartbroken or fatigued. His words comfort me and He calms that storm inside my head. *Learn from Jesus. He continually got alone with God. The insurmountable love and burden for a sinful, fallen world was completely on His shoulders and yet, He took the time to rest and be still with His Father. Imagine if our repetitive thoughts~ the ones that take up 95% of our waking moments~ were transformed to think about God and His promises to us? He wants us to rest, but that doesn’t mean He wants us to stop. That voice that’s telling you to quit is from Satan. God’s voice tells us~ Be still. He is God. We are not. Life isn’t a chore. It’s a blessed, joy-filled opportunity to be about our Father’s business. Google might tell me otherwise. The world tells me “I” have to do it all. The devil tells me that “I” am not cut out for the ministry and convinces me that~”I just want to be me, plain old Charisse”~ but GOD… Who am I with God? I am crucified with Christ, YET NOT I, but Christ… In the multitude of my thoughts within me, His comfort delights my soul. SCRIPTURE READING: Philippians 4:4-9 Matthew 11:28-30 Jeremiah 6:16 Psalm 46:10 Hebrews 4:9-12 Psalm 16:7-9, 11 Lamentations 3:22-24 Galatians 6:9 Romans 12:1-2 Galatians 2:20 Psalm 94:19
9/8/2023
Pain Has A Purpose“Pain has a purpose.”
When I am in the middle of heartache, I don’t want to hear that. There have been seasons in my life where I could not see any purpose in the pain I was going through, because I allowed Satan to tell me otherwise. Times I thought that perhaps God was punishing me, or felt as if God was nowhere to be found. Thoughts based on feelings, and not God’s truth. As a pastor’s wife and child of God I always felt it was my “job” to encourage. My life should be a picture of joy and happiness, a light shining for the world to see. And so, for a very long time I kept my pain neatly tucked away, deep down where no one could see it except Jesus. But then God told me to start this Facebook page. Suddenly I am sharing my life with the world. An open book. And I am vulnerable. But I do it. And the more I share, the more I see the purpose. God never asked me to hide my pain. I believe He wants me to share it so that others going through similar heartache can know, they are not alone. I can honestly cheer you on and tell you~“You can do this!!” Because with God’s help, I have. It has caused me to pray and trust God more than ever before. When I am in the middle of a really hard season, this page has made me realize that my journey hasn’t just been about heartache. My life has had so much beauty, beauty that far outweighs the pain. Beauty that tips the scales. Satan doesn’t want me to realize that. He doesn’t want you to realize it either. Within the last two weeks, three major prayer requests of mine have been answered. I had been praying for one for over 6 years. I had been praying for one for over 6 months and I had been praying for one for over 6 weeks. The days and weeks leading up to these answers were absolutely brutal, but God answered in phenomenal ways. Like literally~ ”Fall to my knees, miracle working” ways. I felt like a child at Christmas. Tears were shed. Praises were said. I could not stop thinking about how awesome God is. Until yesterday. Only seven short days later. I don’t know if it was fatigue. I don’t know if it was hormones. I don’t know if it was just the fact that all those buried emotions came to the surface~ but I could not stop crying. I tried to read my bible. I tried to pray, but the tears continued to flow. Not good tears. Not happy tears. Sad, mixed up, ‘filled with lies’ tears. And I realized right then and there that this life is a continual battle. That our armor has to always be on, because Satan will always attack, especially when we are feeling weak. He knows just how to get to me. My weakness is my thought life. He plants the thought, and I am so naive that I just continue to water it. It gets bigger and bigger until I am convinced it is true and I can’t get past it. I think that I can’t pray because my heart isn’t right, and I find myself stuck in a mess of my own making. In a moment of weakness I have forgotten all of God’s goodness and believed all of satan’s lies. And I’ll be honest, after months of “hard”, I am tired. I don’t want to fight. I don’t want to be in this battle. My brain is frazzled and I don’t want to think about anything. I don’t want to pray in these moments. I don’t want to get into God’s word. I want to sit on my couch, binge watch a show and eat ice cream. Heres the truth ladies~ WE HAVE TO FIGHT! Here’s another truth~ God wants us to have joy, satan doesn’t. Here’s another truth~ God’s words are power. Prayer is our life line. God has answered countless requests, He has come through for us time and time again. He has given us beauty from ashes. He has never left us. He has loved us more than life itself. The VERY life of His Son. That is true love… A week ago we took our 6 grandchildren up north for a little getaway. The days were filled with fun and laughter, lots of hugs, kisses and snuggles, but when bedtime came, so did the tears. Two separate nights, two of my grandchildren could not sleep because they were scared. They were scared because they were laying in bed allowing their thoughts to run rampant. I didn’t get mad. I held them close and allowed the tears to come, and then I asked them if the things that were making them scared were true. They knew they weren’t. I asked them if God wanted them to be sad. They knew He didn’t. I told them only the devil wants you to be scared and sad, not God. He wants us happy. And I told them to tell that devil to get lost, because God was with them. I encouraged them with something I used to tell my own children~to lay in bed and think about God’s goodness and all the wonderful, happy moments He has given us. Like Christmas morning. Like Jesus. It seemed too easy, but they were smiling and ended up falling right to sleep. Because that’s what child like faith looks like. And I wan’t to always have that kind of faith. I might not ever know the purpose behind some of the pain I have walked through, but I do know this. I never walked alone. It may have been an extremely lonely journey at times, but God never left my side. He didn’t get mad when I was scared and crying. Instead, He reminded me of His truths. Powerful truths to fight the lies. And when my focus turned to His truth, my heart could dwell on His goodness to me, and help me to remember all the beautiful ‘Christmas morning’ moments of my life. I want to encourage you today to keep fighting. To keep speaking God’s truths over satan’s lies. To remember how much God loves you and how He wants your life to be filled with joy. Don’t believe the lies ladies. Don’t fall into the same trap I did. Stop trying to figure out the purpose and just dwell in His presence. Once you do, you will see the path He has for you and realize that’s exactly where your fullness of joy is found. I desperately want you to know that there is beauty on the other side, and maybe one day the story of your pain will bring hope to others. You will cheer them on with the words~ ”You can do it!!” Because through God’s power~ You will know that you already have!! Psalm 16:11, 27:11-14, 34:19 Romans 8:18,24-39, 15:13 2 Corinthians 1:3-4, 4:16-18, 12:10 Philippians 1:6 Isaiah 61:1-3 1 Peter 4:13 James 1:12 2 Timothy 4:5 John 16:33
9/1/2023
Come Into His PresenceIn the last few months my prayer life has been utterly chaotic. I’m a list girl and a homebody. I like simple days where I check off my to do’s and feel a sense of organized accomplishment at the end of that day. I’m sure it’s a control issue, and not always very realistic.
Ideally, I like to start each day spending time with God. Getting my coffee. Sitting in bed, reading His words and praying. Something in me craves this early morning organization and quiet. When painful, busy, heartbreaking moments hit day after day and that control and quiet is suddenly taken from me ~ I begin to get desperate. I find myself crying and telling God I can’t do it. I’m too tired. I am depleted. I need rest. I need just a few moments alone with Him. And in my self pity, I neglect to see that God has orchestrated all of this chaos for my good. Even when it feels far from good. Several months back I decided to be more committed to prayer throughout my day. My phone has always been a distraction to me, and I wanted to put it to better use. I changed the pictures on my lock screen so that a different picture continually pops up. I chose beautiful beaches and sunsets as the back drop, and then added names or groups to each picture. All of my children and their spouses. My grandchildren. Our church family. our extended family, etc. Each time a different name popped up, I would pray for that person/persons. I was vigilant in the beginning, but as my days of ease and comfort crept by, I didn’t always pray for the person on my screen when I picked up that phone. Until life turned upside down. Week after week went by, and due to hard and sometimes heartbreaking circumstances beyond my control, organized time with God became almost obsolete. I found myself asking God why. I found myself losing hope. I found myself crying and wondering how this could be for my good when I couldn’t even spend time with Him. And then God showed me. Throughout the hard days and weeks and months, I had prayed to God more than I ever did before. It wasn’t neatly organized with my bible and coffee cup in hand, it was desperation. It was heavy. It was chaotic. It was continual. It was pleading. It was lamenting. It was crying. Every time I picked up that phone and read the names there, it was consciously begging God to help, and comfort, and work miracles. Did my miracles come? Were my prayers all answered? No. I am still begging and lamenting and crying out to Him, but now I am also praising. Because the more I cried out to Him, the more I felt His presence. He took me and wrapped His arms around me and held me. He has walked with me through the chaos. I have never been alone. He let me cry. He let me lament. He allowed me to ask all the “why’s” and in His sweet, tender mercy and grace~ He loved me and drew me in even closer. And as my minutes of chaos pass each day, I feel His peace with me like I never have before. Maybe you’re going through a time like this yourself. Maybe you’re wondering where God is in all of this. He has never been closer. He’s always been right there with you. He’s walking behind you to catch you when you fall, he’s walking with you so that you can lean on Him when you’re weary and He’s walking ahead of you, continually making sure your path is an easier road to travel. Amid the chaos and pain, we may not even realize it, but minute by minute He’s taking our burdens on Himself. Life would be so much harder without Him. Sometimes we just can’t see that. Today I want you to take His hand as He leads you through your chaos. Lean on Him and tell Him all about it. All throughout your day continue to talk to Him~ wherever you are, whatever you are doing. You will feel your burden become lighter, even when the chaotic circumstances around you have not changed. And you will know. It’s all because of Him. Jesus never told us to come with our prayer journal neatly situated on our lap, coffee cup in hand and worship music playing softly in the background. There are no special requirements needed for coming into His presence, except to just come. Wherever we are. Whatever we are doing. Just come. His presence will overwhelm your tired soul with hope, and give you unimaginable peace again. Psalm 139, 145:18-19 Matthew 11:28 1 Peter 1:3-9
7/7/2023
I Was Just A KidWhen I was younger, I was teased a lot. Mostly by boys, and not in a good way. Quite often the remarks went along the lines of my appearance. My boyish hair cut and body shape only added fuel to the fire. And even though I was just a kid, I can remember those remarks like it was yesterday, and they still sting…
There are many mistakes I made as a mom. I think most moms end up feeling this way at some point. Even today I worry that I disappoint my adult children, and they see a different mom than the one I hope to be. But one of my greatest regrets is not taking lessons from my own life, and praying specifically for those areas in the lives of my children. Years after the fact, I found out that my own kids went through teasing and heartache when they were younger. Heartache that they never told me about. That knowledge brings the tears. My heart hurts deeply for the little souls they once were. I thought we talked about everything. But then I realized, I never told my own mom about the comments that were made about me when I was younger. I kept them to myself and cried silently in bed at night. I prayed about so many things for my children, but there were so many other things I could have been praying about. My heart is burdened today to encourage mamas with children of all ages to get down on your knees and go to the throne of God for your kids. They are fighting battles from day 1 that we may never know about. I’m so thankful that as I have gotten older I’ve realized this, and as I look back at the struggles I had and the battles I fought, I can now pray specifically for my children in those areas. But their childhood is past. I can’t go back and change it. And even though they were just kids, the memories of all the bad still hold on. Satan has a way of doing that to us. And it discourages and defeats and depresses. So today, I am even more determined to bathe my kids in prayer. I can’t change the past but Jesus can change their future. He can change their outlook. He can give them victory. I don’t think parents can ever pray too much for their children, it is so incredibly important. Prayer is like breathing life into them. But I also remember those early stages of motherhood. When they’re little, sometimes it’s hard to see past the “now” into the future. We pray for things that are relevant. We pray for their salvation or their hearts to remain pure, we pray for their attitudes or their obedience. We pray for their personalities and characteristics, but too often we forget to pray for their minds. Their thought life. We forget to pray for their battles. Perhaps because we only see them as kids, and what might feel like a battle to them seems small and insignificant to us. Because we forget the battles we fought. The battles in our mind that still remain. Don’t forget mom. What is going on in their life right now will remain with them forever. Your prayers can change their futures. Prayers for protection against things that are said and done. Prayers that our own words and actions will uplift and encourage them. Prayers that they will always know how much they are loved by us, but more importantly by God. Prayers that their futures won’t be determined by the wrongful actions of others. Prayers that they will always come to you and share their hearts. Prayers that they will know, they can always go to you and ask for prayer. Because they know you’re a praying mom. Pray specifically mama. Talk to them about the battles you fought as a child. Ask your children questions. Ask the Holy Spirit to show you how to pray for your them. Don’t spend more time worrying about their circumstances than you spend on your knees talking to God on their behalf. Don’t look back and regret the fact that you missed the battles they were fighting, because they were literally fighting for their future. Cover that future in prayer. So many negative thoughts can be traced back to a childhood memory. Don’t allow Satan to have that victory over your kids. It’s built into a mama’s DNA to protect her children, but too often in the early years we focus so much on their physical well being and protection that we neglect to pray for the thoughts their futures will hold. You fight on your knees for them from the moment you find out you are going to be a mama. Day 1. Physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. They’re only kids, but they are your kids. Make sure they know they have a praying mama. There is no greater gift you can give your child. SCRIPTURE READING: Philippians 4:6,8 Deuteronomy 31:6 Matthew 22:37 I Peter 5:7&8 Romans 8:31-35,37-39, 12:2 Psalm 34:17-20, 71:18, 78:4,6&7, 94:19, 127:1-3, 147:3 2 Corinthians 10:5 Hebrews 4:12 Isaiah 26:3, 41:10, 54:13&17 Proverbs 3:5-6, 4:23 Ephesians 6:17
6/30/2023
When Life Isn’t A Joy RideI honestly don’t know how long I had been driving before I noticed the red and blue lights flashing in my rear view mirror. We live in a rural area. Long stretches of road with nothing but fields and beautiful views for miles. It’s wonderful, and doesn’t give much occasion to glance back at any oncoming traffic. Traffic is pretty nonexistent. I was singing along to some worship music with several kids in tow. Probably why I didn’t hear the siren. My children and their cousins were the reason I finally noticed. Fighting had ensued, followed by yelling (from me) “to knock it off or I’ll pull over!” It wasn’t until that moment that I finally looked in my mirror to see if they were obeying. Instead, I spotted flashing lights beckoning me to stop. So I pulled over. It wasn’t pretty. Apparently I had been speeding. 🤷🏼♀️ I was flustered, and when prompted to surrender proof of insurance, said proof could not be found. The officer returned to his vehicle, and of course that’s when I found it. When he came back I smiled cheerfully and said “I found it!” to which he replied. “Too late. I’m writing you a ticket.” My cheerfulness went right out the window. I’m sure the kids heard about it the rest of the way home. Isn’t that how life can be at times? We think we’re doing all the right things. We go to church and Bible studies. We read devotionals and blogs. We listen to podcasts and sing along to worship music. We coast through life enjoying the view, and then suddenly we are hit with an inconvenient attack from the devil. And we lose it. What we don’t realize is that~ all along Satan has been right on our tail but we were being too “spiritual” to notice. Too often all the good things take the place of the best things and when that inconvenience strikes, we can’t fight it. Suddenly we’re searching for truth, but we’re already in trouble. The Christian life isn’t just a joy ride. It’s a battle. We live in a day where knowledge and opinions are at our fingertips. So many people are telling us how we should live, that we don’t even search for that truth ourselves. We let others do that work, and in the process we miss out on all the wonders God has specifically for us. Wonders that only come from time spent with Him. Reading His words. Asking the Holy Spirit to show us what we need. Listening to the voice of God speak to our hearts. We want easy. We want quick. We want to glide through life and not have to dig for the answers. For the proof. Eventually Satan catches up to us. God’s word tells us that he goes about seeking who he can devour. How can we be prepared? By keeping God’s armor on at all times. The armor of God is so much more than a great Sunday School lesson or Vacation Bible School theme. It’s something you can study and glean countless knowledge from. I’m going to share a quick overview, but I HIGHLY recommend you get into God’s word yourself and look up scripture references that correlate with every piece of God’s armor. Armor God has specifically made for you! 1. The Belt of Truth- you cannot know what is truth if you aren’t in God’s word. Don’t let someone else tell you what is truth, read it for yourself. Jesus tells us HE is the way and the truth. God tells us to think on whatsoever things are true. Our hearts can so easily be deceived (even by ourselves) when we don’t know God’s truth. 2. The Breastplate of Righteousness- Righteousness only comes from Jesus. All our righteousness is like filthy rags. Nothing else can take the place of Jesus and the protection that He gives your heart and soul. 3. Shoes Fit for the Gospel of Peace- There is so much to learn from God’s word on the gospel of peace. God’s peace passes ALL understanding. When we are attacked, is this the reaction the world sees from us? 4. The Shield of Faith- Our faith will always be tested (proved) and it will not remain strong if we are continually relying on others for knowledge from God’s word. Faith strengthens when time is spent with the God of all strength. 5. The Helmet of Salvation- This is of utmost importance. Without the gift of salvation received by faith, the battle cannot be won. God’s gift of His Son’s death on the cross rescues us from eternal damnation. It renews and transforms our minds against anything the devil tries to deceive us with. Once received, salvation can never be taken away. It is our protection for eternity. 6. The Sword of the Spirit-God’s word is so powerful. It’s inspired. It speaks to our soul and spirit. It shows us doctrine, reproof, correction and instruction. I didn’t think it was fair when I received a ticket for not providing proof of insurance “fast enough”, because I still provided the proof. I’m not trying to compare that police officer to Satan but… 😂 Here’s the thing~Satan doesn’t play fair. Don’t coast through life on a joy ride with Satan on your tail, because he will catch up. Have your proof always ready and when he does show up, just speaking the name of Jesus will be your truth, because you know you’re ready for that battle. You’re strong in the Lord and the power of HIS might. His armor is all you need. Praise God for the gift He gives us in others, in the beautiful feet of those who share the gospel of peace. We all need specific men and women that God places in our lives, but their words should never take the place of HIS WORDS. Instead of allowing someone else (this blog included) to tell you how God is speaking to you, spend time in the presence of God Himself. That is a sweet, precious intimacy between you and your Savior. Nothing else can take its place. SCRIPTURE READING: John 8:32, 10:28-30, 14:16&27, 16:13&33, 17:17 Philippians 4:6-8 Isaiah 64:6 Romans 3:22&23, 10:15&17, 12:2&3, 15:13 Titus 3:5-7 James 3:17&18 Ephesians 2:8&9, 3:16&17, 4:3, 6:10-18 Psalm 119:165 Proverbs 3:5&6 Mark 9:23 I Peter 1:8&9, 5:8-10 2 Peter 1:19-21 I John 5:4 I Corinthians 16:13 Hebrews 4:12, 12:2 I Timothy 6:12 2 Timothy 2:15, 3:16&17 Isaiah 52:7, 54:17 Hebrews 2:1-3
6/23/2023
Are You Under AttackSatan knows when the best time is to attack. Each of us have our triggers. Maybe it’s loneliness, or something deep within that no one else knows about. For some, it might be the work place, for others it might be family. For me, it’s the dark of night.
Sharing this is something that I wrestled with. I haven’t wanted to. Maybe one day I will tell the whole story, but for today I will just share a part… During the day time hours it’s easy for me to feel like “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me”. It might not always be easy to fight battles, but my heart and my mind know what the truth is. I can think logically. I can get in God’s word. I can pray, quote scripture and listen to worship music. But in the middle of the night, when my brain is in a fog and I’m half asleep~that’s when satan strikes. Often. I get up 2-3 times a night. Old age and 4 kids. Always, I stumble into the bathroom. The entire world is dark and quiet, and even though I am half asleep~ thoughts immediately spring up into my head out of nowhere. My defenses are down and I am not prepared for the battle. And it’s a big one. A battle of doubt that wages against everything I’ve ever believed. And it’s scary. And it’s very hard to admit. Today I want to mention some things that have helped me through this. Maybe you don’t have the same issues that I do, but maybe you’re fighting different battles and you feel helpless and alone. Maybe scared. I pray these things can help and encourage you to fight with your everything, and to remember that God is always, always for you. There are no weapons that are stronger than He is, because our weapons aren’t carnal. They’re spiritual and they will pull down the strongholds that battle against us. He will always fight for us. For me, the time of the attacks is what makes them hard. 2-3 times, night after night. Let’s be real here, in my sleepy state I am not going to do a Bible study on the toilet in the dark. I’m not going to blast worship music and wake up my husband. Quite often I just want to go back to sleep, and I’m not thinking logically. So, what’s a person to do in that situation? Be prepared ahead of time. Here are some things that can help you with your battle, especially when the attack hits you out of nowhere. 1. Remember. It doesn’t matter what the situation is or where you are, you can remember the goodness of God on your life. In the past, in the present and in the future. If Jesus is your Savior, you will one day be in glory with Him. That alone can help sustain us. So when that attack happens, and it will happen, start thanking and praising Jesus for EVERYTHING. Every single thing that comes into your heart and mind. Remember our God of the Bible. He is your God too. Remember His faithfulness. Recall it. Say it out loud. Remember. 2. Read. Stay in God’s word and hide it in your heart. When an attack happens, you don’t have the luxury to say to Satan- “Can you hold on a minute while I get out my Bible and look up some verses?” Know God’s truths. Memorize them and use them to fight against the lies. An amazing chapter to meditate on is Psalm 119. I listen to it on my bible app every single day as I’m putting on my makeup and preparing for the day. Over and over let His words saturate your heart and soul. 3. Refrain. Stay away from things that can mess with your head, ie television shows, music and social media. For me, the things that my eyes (and heart) take in right before going to bed at night can have a huge impact on how my night goes. We don’t realize how much these things can affect us negatively. Every single day we soak it all in~ sadly, even more than we soak in God’s words to us. This is a huge deterrent to our spiritual warfare. The Holy Spirit will show you the things you need to steer clear of, you just need to listen. 4. Rely and Pray. In my situation there were times this was a tough one, because doubt was my battle field. In those moments all I could do was say the name of Jesus. And that is enough. There is power in His name. Did the doubts magically go away at 2am? No. 4am rolls around and BAM!, I’m hit again. But I will keep saying His name over and over. Why? Because of my first two points. He has always been faithful to me and I know He’s not going to stop now. His word is His promise. God helped me in ways I could never imagine. My heart was saying “Lord I believe, help my unbelief.” And He did just that. In amazing ways that bring tears to my eyes. And every night, I remember. Be prepared for the battle. Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks. Prove all things. Hold fast that which is good. Faithful is he that calls you, who also will do it. He will be your Warrior. He will be your Comfort. He will be your Peace. Remember. Read. Refrain. Rely. The battle is already won. SCRIPTURE READING: 1 Thessalonians 5:5-6, 8, 10-11, 16-18, 21-24 2 Corinthians 10:4-5 Psalm 71:18, 77:6, 78:4, 101:3, 102:18, 119, 143:5 Daniel 2:22 I John 5:14-15 Colossians 3:2 Ephesians 6:10-18 Romans 12:2-3 Philippians 2:9-11, 4:13 Mark 9:23-24 John 1:1-5,9, 8:12, 14:18, 26 Hebrews 13:5 Deuteronomy 1:30, 20:4 I Timothy 1:5-14, 6:12 2 Peter 1:12
6/16/2023
Is Jesus Sick Of Hearing From Me?Some of you will think I’m crazy when you read this, but the other night I received a late night text message from my son.
And it made me tear up. Not because he was being sentimental or sharing his love, but because he asked if it would be okay to talk to his dad. Yep, that brought the tears. He still needed his dad. Sometimes, as our kids get older we see them unconsciously moving farther and farther away from us. Not physically, but emotionally. It’s just a part of the maturing process. They don’t need us anymore. And that’s hard. Even though we’re incredibly proud of the adult they have become, somehow we don’t feel as important to them anymore. But then there are moments like these. My husband never turns his phone off. He’s a pastor, so he needs to be available 24/7. My kids know this, so in an effort not to wake him late at night, they will text me to see if we are sleeping. They know they won’t disturb us, because I turn my phone off when we go to bed. The thing is, they also know that if they did call their daddy, he would answer. He would help. He would get out of bed and go to their house to fix any problem at any hour of the night. No matter what. That’s the kind of daddy he is. Always on call. Always helping. Always present. And man, isn’t that just a picture of our Heavenly Daddy? Someone commented on one of my posts recently and said, “I know Jesus must be sick of hearing from me.” I immediately wanted to reassure her~ “NO, NO this isn’t true!” Yet, as I looked deeper at my own heart I realized I have had those same thoughts myself. Too often my prayers seem to come back to… “I’m sorry God… I messed up again. Help me God. Please help me. Why do I keep doing this God? When will I learn? I have no right even asking You for help, but please, please help me.” I get myself into trouble then need God to bail me out. Over and over. And I feel ashamed to even ask. To even call on Him. Just like we don’t want our own children to experience the “hard” alone, God feels the same about his children. Whether we grow and mature in our Christian faith, or fail time and time again, we will always need our Heavenly Father. Always. And that makes me think about these moments with my kids. There isn’t a single thing they could do that would make me turn them away and not answer when they call for help… When they call just to talk, when they call to complain, when their hearts are broken, when they’re hurting or excited, happy or sad. Always, my heart yearns to listen, to help them and to rejoice with them. I never tire of hearing from them. Their daddy feels the same way, and so does their Heavenly Father. And He wants to hear from us. He will never, ever get sick of hearing from us because we are His children. Forgiven, redeemed, justified and loved. Loved beyond comprehension. No matter the time, no matter how often, no matter the reason… no matter what, Jesus will always be there. He will answer. Always on call. Always helping. Always present. That’s the kind of Father He is. That’s the kind of Daddy He is. Call on Him today. SCRIPTURE READING: Psalm 5:3, 18:6, 34:6, 42:8, 72:12-13, 102:1-2, 17, 103:13, 145:18 Isaiah 64:7 Jeremiah 33:3 Matthew 7:11 Luke 11:13 John 3:16, 15:16 Romans 8:26 2 Corinthians 6:18 Philippians 4:6-7 Hebrews 4:16 I John 3:1, 4:9, 5:14
4/7/2023
Don’t Lose HopeCan you imagine being the very first person that got to walk into Paradise with Jesus immediately after His crucifixion? I weep at the thought. I can almost picture it, the two of them entering Heaven’s glory. The thief weeping and laughing as Jesus smiles and hugs him. What hope this story gives to us all! A hope of redemption. A hope of new life when all seems lost.
Hope has been the theme of my story since I started this blog. Today I am here to remind you~ Don’t give up hope. Not on a child who has gone astray, not on a loved one who you’ve prayed desperately for, and not on yourself. There are so many lessons from the story of the thief on the cross. The account is only mentioned in one gospel, but the message has a huge impact. The thief did nothing to deserve forgiveness. The thief did nothing to merit him walking into eternal paradise with Jesus. He simply believed. As the scene unfolds, I can see Mary the mother of Jesus weeping at the foot of the cross, but I also wonder about the mother of the thief. Was she there as well? Was she weeping for her son? Was his wife there, or perhaps his sister? Prayers seemed unanswered for the son, the husband, the brother. There had been no repentance. He was being crucified. All seemed lost. This was the end. But it wasn’t. With his last breath he saw his sinfulness. He understood Who Jesus truly was and He understood that only Jesus, the Son of God could forgive his trespasses and take him to heaven. Hope was not lost. Jesus did not give up on that thief. Through horrifying agony and pain, He loved unconditionally. He gave mercy and grace. He forgave. As He took upon Himself the sins of all mankind, the agony and pain He endured were for that thief. They were for your son or daughter, and for your spouse. They were for your brother or sister and they were for you. Whatever situation you find yourself in, keep bringing it to Jesus. Your health. Your marriage. Your spouse. Your children. Your finances. Your past, your present or your future. There is always hope at the foot of the cross. Walk into Easter simply believing that because of Jesus there is hope with every breath you take. Walk into Easter holding on to that hope. Walk into Easter holding on to the thief’s redemptive story. Walk into Easter holding on to Jesus, the Son of God Who gave Himself for you. SCRIPTURE READING: I John 5:13-15 Luke 23:39-43 Psalm 16:8-9, 31:24, 71:14, 112:6-7 Romans 8:37, 12:12, 15:13 I Corinthians 13:7 Philippians 1:6, 4:6 Isaiah 41:10 2 Peter 3:8-9 Luke 1:37 Proverbs 3:5-6 Hebrews 12:2-3 Ephesians 6:10 Titus 2:13 I could hear her little voice as they entered the bathroom, and I chuckled to myself. “It’s messy in here mommy!” She continued to babble about her little brother, the stall, the toilet paper, and the changing table. As I washed my hands I think I heard the words “don’t touch that” a dozen times.
I remember those days, but not with disdain. With longing. In that moment in the Meijer bathroom, my heart had an incredibly deep, unexplainable yearning for one more moment like that. One more moment just to hear my daughter’s childhood voice talking to me about everything her little mind could think of. I don’t know why there are times that that longing grabs a hold of my heart so fiercely. Some days I miss it all so much. The giggles upstairs and the reprimands to “go to sleep!!” The toys all over the house. The forts built under the piano. The laundry EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. The constant “I’m hungry”. All the talks. The fun conversations, but also the hard ones. The “talks” about changing bodies and crushes and heart breaks. Talks about mean kids at school, but the reassurance of the forever love of mom and dad. And Jesus. A deep love from Jesus that is not fickle like the friendships of adolescents. Yes, some days I yearn for it all. I yearn to hear my little girl babbling in the bathroom as I try to change her sister’s diaper. Maybe it’s the remembrance of unconditional love looking up at me through the wide eyes of naive innocence. Mommy could fix everything and do no wrong. Or, maybe it’s because at times~as hard as motherhood seemed to me back then~I can now look back and realize that in those moments, life for my children was so much easier. I long to fix everything for my adult children just by saying the words “I love you” and with a simple smile and a hug, watch their life become beautiful again. When our children were little they could bounce back and in a moment, life goes back to being care free. But the older our children get and the more time that passes, the more mom realizes that at times life can be very cruel for the ones we love more than anything in this world. And that’s when the hard truly hits. So today I remind myself of the talks. The talks about the love of mom and dad, but more importantly of Jesus. Today I want to remind my adult children of that love. The incredible, deep love I have for them, but more than anything~Jesus. A friend Who sticks closer than a brother, even closer than mom and dad. Jesus, Who literally loves with His everything. Jesus, Whose heart yearns for carefree moments for my children even more than my own heart yearns for it. That’s a fierce yearning. That’s a love deeper than I can imagine. As much as I long to hear that babbling again, Jesus wants to hear it from our children too. He wants to hear ALL the babbling. He wants to hear our children talk to Him about every single thing their minds can think of. And He wants to hear it from me as well. He wants me to tell Him all about it. So today, I did. Today I babbled on and on with Jesus. I told Him all about it. I cried. I laughed. I asked silly questions. And in that moment, just like a child who feels deeply loved~ Life became carefree again. SCRIPTURE READING: Psalm 37:25, 42:4-5&11, 51:12, 62:8, 142:1-2, Isaiah 49:15, 66:13 Philippians 4:6-8 John 8:36 Galatians 5:1
2/17/2023
So Today, I Talked To God About You.Last January as I was taking down my Christmas decorations, I decided to put my 7 foot Christmas tree away all by myself. My husband wasn’t home that night, but I didn’t want to wait. I found the perfect shelf for it out in our garage, all I had to do was haul it out there and hoist it up on to that shelf.
The shelf was much higher than my head. I was sure I could do it with a ladder and a little gumption. I set the tree bag upright and then climbed the ladder, grabbed the tree and pulled. It was very heavy and awkward, but I managed to get it over my head. That’s when I got stuck. It was too heavy to hoist above my shoulders and onto the shelf, and I began to lose my balance. I couldn’t put it down because if I moved, my balance would be off and I would fall backwards. I didn’t want to risk just dropping it and somehow breaking it. So I stood there on that ladder, holding on to that tree as it balanced on top of my head. My spine began to feel like an accordion, I was all alone, I didn’t have my cell phone and my husband wouldn’t be home for two more hours. I don’t know how much time went by, or how many ideas and scenarios went through my head. (My husband coming home to me lying on the garage floor under a Christmas tree~probably dead~was one of them.) So, how did I get out of it? I think somehow God miraculously helped me because when I didn’t think there was any possible answer for the situation I found myself in, I prayed. Why is it so often our last resort? Maybe I felt like it was hopeless. Perhaps I felt foolish going to God about the stupid mess I got myself into~ thinking I could do it all on my own~ but just like that, He answered. He gave me an idea, I tried it and within minutes that tree was on that shelf. It seems to me, in my own life I can catch myself doing this same thing. So many loved ones and friends have been going through heartache and it’s a heavy, heavy burden. Add social media to the mix and the barrage of bad news on a daily basis, and you can feel like the weight of it is too much. With friends on Facebook and Instagram and instant access to requests for prayer, often you close your computer feeling utterly heartbroken over the trials many are going through. And you feel helpless. I find myself wishing I could make their pain go away or that I could physically do something, anything to make them feel better. The suffering of loved ones and friends is a constant weight inside my mind. Even as I prayed about what to write to you today, I felt helpless. I asked God how I could help those of you who are reading this, how I could encourage and uplift to make other’s lives a little better. And then I opened His word, and I knew He heard my prayer. He showed me that I can’t fix everyone’s pain. I am not the answer because I am not God. Suddenly I found myself picturing the hundreds of hurting friends, loved ones and acquaintances. And Jesus. Just like the hundreds begging for help in Jesus day. It was never too many. He did not turn any away. Long lines, throngs of people pressing in. And the beautiful compassion of Jesus. And He whispered to my heart~ “Bring them to me. Don’t carry that heavy burden on your shoulders, I will carry it for you, all you need do is bring them to me.” And so, I have. Every time my heart feels heavy and helpless for the needs of many, I bring those needs to Jesus. It might seem like such a small thing, praying for the needs of others when you wish you could physically do something for them, but my friend~ it’s the most powerful gift you can give them. The compassion of Jesus. Maybe you’re trying to fix things on your own, not wanting to wait for help. Maybe your burden is for the heartache of others. Maybe your burden is for your own heartache or maybe you’re just trying to balance life’s ladder, holding all of your baggage and ashamed of the messes you’ve gotten yourself into. There is not one burden we’re meant to carry alone. There is not one burden that is hopeless. As much as I wish I could, there are no fancy words I could pen to magically make everything better, but the needs of many are not meant to rest on my shoulders. When we continue to worry, to think of every worst case scenario, to feel like the situation is hopeless and help is far away, we will end up flat on our backs under the weight of it all, just like I almost did with that tree. God wants us to hand it to Him and trust that He will take care of it. So today, I talked to God about you. He took you. He lifted you up. He set you up on a high place, under the shadow of His wings. A place of peace, where the weight of the world becomes weightless. And I know~ There is no better place for my friend to be. SCRIPTURE READING: Psalm 3:3, 28:7, 31:24, 34:17-18, 40:2-4, 61:2, 91:14, 121, 145:18 Ecclesiastes 4:10 Numbers 6:24-26 Matthew 9:36, 11:28-30, 19:26 I Peter 5:7 Isaiah 41:13 Jeremiah 31:25 Philippians 4:6-7 “I’ve never wanted to breathe for someone else so badly.”
Her words touched me deeply. I don’t think I will ever forget them. I’ve been sharing posts this week about little baby Amelia. These were the words her mama posted today. I have never physically met her and she may not know this, but she has been a tremendous blessing in my life. When I first began my Facebook page, I stumbled across another~ Practical Living for the Christian Girl. I stepped out of my comfort zone and reached out to sweet Meghan, asking for help with my own page. Even though I felt like a complete idiot for not knowing simple things, she never made me feel that way. Instead, she loved on me and helped me and because of her selflessness, her time, and her love~ she has invested in the thousands that follow Holding Hope today. She humbly allowed herself to be used of God. And today her little girl is being used to bring thousands to the Throne of Grace. My own heart has been pricked with conviction this week. How often we waste our thoughts and our words, even our time. We go about our every day moments and mundane activities and don’t even think about talking to God. Even when life may not necessarily “feel” good, it’s normal. We complain easily and forget to be thankful. Quite often we even forget to talk to our Savior throughout our days. But then a tiny precious soul touches us all and as we do our “normal”, we cannot help but think of her and go to God for her. Suddenly our petty complaints about our normal lives seem selfish, because honestly~ they are. Her sweet mama wrote~ “Where I cannot give her breath or a steady beating heart, He can.” Amelia has given this gift to us all. A steady beating HEART unified in the prayers lifted on her behalf. She has breathed LIFE into the prayers of thousands, as she fights for her own. This little one has done mighty things for God. Let us not forget this. Realize how abundantly blessed you are. As the days turn into weeks and you go about your “normal”, continue to talk to God throughout your day. Use your words to speak to your Savior, and in turn allow Him to speak through you to others. Lift each other up in prayer, but also in purpose. Help those in need. Give of your time. Be selfless. Be loving. Let your Amen always remind you of Amelia. A tiny soul who changed us all. SCRIPTURE READING: Philippians 4:6-7 Colossians 4:2 Matthew 18:20, 26:41 Psalm 5:3, 19:14, 42:8 I Thessalonians 5:16-18
12/2/2022
A Bit Of JollyHave you ever prayed for your children, but deep down felt like it would take a literal miracle for it to be answered?
Sadly, I have… I had a dear friend who used to remind me continually of who Jesus is. Not who Jesus was, but who He is~ the same yesterday, today and forever. The same Jesus who worked wondrous miracles throughout the Bible is the same Jesus working miracles in my life today. My friend went home to heaven one week before my dad. He was such an encourager. From the day we met him until the day he went home to be with Jesus, he continually lifted my heart when it was down. His words were like presents and hugs wrapped into one. He was always jolly, and I think of him so often. Today I recall such a day of encouragement. You see, a mother’s prayer has been answered and my friend encouraged me through the waiting. If you have or had teenage children (or children in general), you will understand. Although it may seem trivial compared to the heartache some are facing today, it can still break a mama’s heart when her daughter’s fight continually and you don’t see any hope at the end of the tunnel. You have visions of them hating each other the rest of their lives. Every holiday get together from now until infinity will be riddled with strife or empty seats because they refuse to celebrate together. Yes, it was that bad. For a few years, I think I cried over my bible and coffee every morning after they left for school. And then one day a miracle slipped in. It was so subtle and although they are completely different personalities, my girls became best friends. And I am in awe. I had almost given up on that prayer. A prayer I prayed for almost 20 years. And when I stood back and watched it unfold, I thought about the words of my friend as he told me stories of his own two girls. How he encouraged me continually, and how his smile lit up his face as he spoke of his daughter’s sweet friendship now. Today, I am on a Christmas shopping trip with my own daughters. Not just the two I spoke of, but my youngest and my daughter in law as well. It has become a Christmas tradition. Our “girls” trip. We get a hotel. We shop, we eat, we drink lots of coffee, we shop some more, we laugh and maybe cry, we pray, we blast Christmas music… and this mama rejoices. My God is so good. Today I want to encourage you to not give up on the heart of your mama prayers. Today I want to encourage you to be an encourager. Everyone needs a bit of jolly in their lives. You can give them that gift. I’m so thankful for my friend and I’ll never forget his words to me. Today as I sit and listen to my girls laughter in the other room, I smile through the tears and I know my friend is smiling in heaven right along with me. With a twinkle in his eye I can hear him say~ I told you Charisse. God can do anything. Scripture Reading: Hebrews 13:8 Hebrews 10:24-25 Romans 1:11-12, 8:26, 15:2, 5 I Thessalonians 5:11, 17 2 Corinthians 1:5 Galatians 6:2 Philippians 4:6 Luke 11:9 John 15:7 Mark 11:24 Jeremiah 33:3 Psalm 27:13-14, 28:7, 34:17
11/4/2022
A Good CryI’m such a baby.
My husband had his knee replaced on Monday. He came home Monday night. Yes, that’s quick. Too quick. Since he did so great with his shoulder replacement in July, we thought we knew what to expect. We were wrong. His first day home he overdid the exercises and didn’t take his prescribed pain medication. Tuesday the pain and swelling set in. By Tuesday evening the tears were rolling down my cheeks as I changed his bandages and heard him cry out in pain. Lessons learned for the next knee, scheduled in December. Wednesday as I sat with him in Physical therapy and watched his face riddled with pain again, I fought back the tears and had this little conversation inside my head~ “Charisse. Get a hold of yourself. Be strong. You look ridiculous crying over this.” I thought about that a lot today. Me being a big baby. How ridiculous I looked crying over my husband’s pain, how ridiculous I look when I cry about a lot of things… but then I had a little God moment epiphany~ Who says? Who says it’s ridiculous to cry? Who has the right to say it is weak to weep when we see loved ones in pain or even when we are experiencing heartache of our own? God doesn’t. Man does. Man’s words are continually ingrained into us~ Be strong. Other people are going through much worse. Look at all your blessings, you have no right to cry. Don’t show your vulnerabilities. Don’t be weak. And yet, the majority of the time it’s all a facade. We are weak. We are human. Tears flow. And guess what? God is okay with that because in our weakness we find His strength. God really opened my eyes to that fact in my bible reading this week. I read the story of a woman who was barren. It touched me deeply. My own child is experiencing this anguish and it is a rollercoaster of emotions. Hard doesn’t come close to describing it. Prayers have been poured out. Tears have been shed. An answer has not come. As I read God’s words to me about the story of Hannah, several things were brought to my attention. Hannah was never reprimanded by God for crying. Hannah cried because of how she was treated by another woman. She cried because her prayers weren’t answered. She cried because her heart was broken. She had bitterness of soul and wept. Even the man of God judged her. God did not. There is power in her story. The hard hit home this week. My husband endured excruciating pain. A sweet friend had breast cancer surgery and another dear friend found out she has pancreatic cancer. There is heartache all around us. Life can be so cruel, but oh how powerful our great God is. He will help us walk through the unthinkable and from our pain He will produce miracles. Others may judge us because of our tears, but God does not. God does not diminish the pain we feel. He does not categorize our tears. He keeps every one of them. He tells us to cast ALL our cares on Him. Not just the big cares, ALL the cares. He understands. God offers grace. He offers tenderness. He offers miracles. As I got my dad’s old walker out of the backseat of our car and helped my husband into another therapy session yesterday, the emotions were all there. Memories came rushing in of doing the same thing for my dad at countless doctor appointments. It was also the anniversary of my mom’s home going. In that brief moment I wanted to yell at the world~”I’m tired of trying to be strong!!!” But then I recalled the words of a dear friend, beautifully reminding us all not to quit. Hannah never quit. Though she had tears, she kept on praying to God for her miracle. And so, I watched my husband take one tiny step after another and I thanked God through the tears. I know God’s working miracles, but I also know He thinks it’s okay if I cry through the process. I will give the hard to Him again and again, day after day because my yoke might be heavy but when I give that yoke to Him, my burdens become light. I may not see the answers I’m looking for and I might cry like a baby, but this one thing I am confident of~He will hold me through it all and allow me to let the tears fall with no judgement. He will whisper to my soul~ It’s okay Charisse, have a good cry. Miracles are coming. SCRIPTURE READING: 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 Philippians 1:6 Matthew 11:28-30 I Peter 5:7 Psalm 34:17-19, 56:8-9, 147:3-5 Hebrews 4:15-16 I Samuel 1 Isaiah 40:28-29, 43:2 John 16:33
9/23/2022
Taste And SeeWe took our grandsons to Dairy Queen last Sunday evening. My two older grandsons asked if they could share a banana split. I wasn’t sure they understood how large a banana split was, but they assured me they knew, and it wouldn’t be a problem.
They are 9 and 6. We were in the drive through. Our plan was to go around the corner to our break wall and watch the sun set over the water as we ate our treats. I explained to Gabe (the younger of the two) that while we were still in the car I was going to have Ethan hold the sundae until they were able to sit together on the bench to share. I expected a bit of arguing or even the very familiar words “that’s not fair”. To my complete surprise, neither were spoken. Gabe turned to Ethan and in the sweetest, most precious and sincere voice he asked~ ”Could I just look at it Ethan?” That right there melted my heart. His sweet sincerity brought tears to my eyes. I often read devotionals written for moms of young children on how to cope with the overwhelming moments. I remember those moments. I understand. The response of older moms is almost always an encouraging word to cherish that time because it’s over so quickly. But I rarely read about the “hard” of being a mom of adults~ When your adult children have walked away from God. When your adult children are all fighting. When your children are going through horrendous heartache. When their faith is being tried and their prayers aren’t being answered. When your children are all struggling in different areas and pouring their hearts out to you, but not wanting the other siblings to know. When your children don’t want you in their life anymore. Gone are the days that you can lovingly remind them to get back on God’s path when they have misbehaved~ and through tears they agree. Gone are the days when you can send them all to their rooms for fighting, and suddenly they’re giggling and playing like it never happened. Gone are the days that you can rock them as they snuggle in your arms and you tell them everything will be ok, and they believe you. Gone are the days when you are their everything. You pray and you worry and you wonder. How did things change so quickly? And you watch as each day passes. You find yourself wondering if things will ever be ok. And you want to hold those beautiful days again. The days you believed were overwhelming at the time. You understand now why older moms always told you to cherish that time. And then one day things do change, but not in the way you expected. Through his tears of heartache you hear your son telling you~ “everything is going to be okay mom”, because he truly believes that his unanswered prayers are “for his good and God’s glory”. And you are in awe, because your own heart saw the hurt he was experiencing. Your own heart could not see the good. His sweet sincerity brings tears to your own eyes. Not only has God allowed you to just look at His goodness and beauty. He has allowed you to taste it. “O taste and see that the LORD is good: Blessed is the man that trusteth in him.” Psalm 34:8 Just moments after my grandsons started in on their banana split, I heard them exclaim~this is the best thing I’ve ever tasted” Not once, not twice, but the entire time they ate until the bowl was completely empty. Oh how often we as moms can ask God if He would just allow us to look and see some semblance of an answer to our prayers for our children and their future. Could we just look and see and know everything will be ok? And then, sometimes without us even realizing, He does. He shows us. We not only look upon it, but we get to taste of His beauty. Some days a taste of Gods goodness might be right around the corner. Other days it might feel like you’ve been looking at the truth of His words about your children, but have yet to taste of it. And the road seems long. When it comes to your adult children, you might find yourself overwhelmed, heartbroken or even arguing with God. You might find yourself crying that it isn’t fair. This wasn’t your dream as you held that child so close to your heart and rocked them to sleep. But you can still choose to believe in the goodness God has to offer, even though you have yet to taste it. You can choose to open His word and partake in His promises. To trust in a beautiful future ahead and truly believe that you will one day say~ this is the best thing ever. As you whisper through tears~ “can I just look at it God?” He hears the sincere prayers that come from your heart. Taste and see ❤️ SCRIPTURE REFERENCES: “For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us. And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:18, 28 “But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, Neither have entered into the heart of man, The things which God hath prepared for them that love him.” 1 Corinthians 2:9 “casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.” 1 Peter 5:7 “From the end of the earth will I cry unto thee, When my heart is overwhelmed: Lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For thou, O God, hast heard my vows: Thou hast given me the heritage of those that fear thy name.” Psalm 61:2, 5 “I will praise thee for ever, because thou hast done it: And I will wait on thy name; for it is good before thy saints.” Psalm 52:9 “I sought the LORD, and he heard me, And delivered me from all my fears. This poor man cried, and the LORD heard him, And saved him out of all his troubles. O taste and see that the LORD is good: Blessed is the man that trusteth in him. The righteous cry, and the LORD heareth, And delivereth them out of all their troubles. The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; And saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous: But the LORD delivereth him out of them all.” Psalm 34:4, 6, 8, 17-19 “And let the beauty of the LORD our God be upon us: And establish thou the work of our hands upon us; Yea, the work of our hands establish thou it.” Psalm 90:17
7/22/2022
Help My UnbeliefIt hit me this week
My faith. Or lack thereof. If Jesus said I could move mountains with faith as small as a mustard seed, my faith must be the size of a dust particle. You know, the ones you can only see when the sun is streaming through the windows. That’s me. Boasting on my faith when life is all sunshine and happiness~ until a cloud rolls by~ and just like that, the little particle disappears into nothingness. I’ve had a lot of clouds roll by throughout my life. This past month has been no exception. My husband was scheduled for complete shoulder replacement surgery and I’ll be an open book here~ I was dreading it. The doctor, the nurses, the anesthesiologist and people who have had the surgery all warned me that my sweetheart would be in a tremendous amount of pain, and it would be hard. VERY hard. The doctor spoke with me after the surgery and told me that it was worse than he expected. Lots of muscle to get through. He cut, he drilled, he scraped, he chiseled. This would be a tough recovery. So I did what any Christian would do. I reached out and asked for prayer. Hundreds of people responded. It brought tears to my eyes. And yet, despite this, deep down I was mentally preparing myself for the worst. The “worst” never came. And silly me, I kept looking for it. Day after day. I then questioned it. Something must be wrong. How can he have ZERO pain with everything the doctor did? With everything everyone told me to expect? It has been two weeks and he’s not even taking Tylenol. The worst never showed up. The miracle did. And I realized that I didn’t look for the miracle or even expect it when I asked for prayer. And in that moment, so many other things came flooding to my mind. Pleas that I had been praying about for years. Things that God had miraculously answered. Prayers I had prayed with no faith at all, because I was convinced that the person or situation could never change. Prayers prayed for thirty years that had been answered. And I wept. Because God was so faithful to me despite my unfaithfulness. He showed me today that it isn’t about me and how large my faith is, because God doesn’t need my faith. I need my faith. When I uttered the request, He answered. He saw that tiny dust particle floating around and He created a miracle from it in my life. If someone had told me thirty years ago, or even ten years ago that some of my prayers would be answered ten years down the road, my flesh probably would have whined and complained. “TEN years???? That’s SO LONG!!” But, I blinked and it happened. Miracle after miracle after miracle. I continually find myself saying~ I believe, please help my unbelief. And He does. Over and over again. My great God breathed hope back into situations that seemed utterly hopeless. He restored, He healed, He answered. Always when I was least expecting it. When I wasn’t looking. When my faith was floating around like a dust particle… Think back to when you were a child. Do you remember seeing the sunshine streaming through your windows? Can you remember watching in awe as all the little particles danced in that sunshine? Do you remember thinking that somehow you could grab a hold of one and hold it in your hand, yet somehow they eluded your tiny little grasp? Hearken back to that my friend. That child like wonder and awe. That belief that anything is possible. Because it is. But only with God. That tiny particle of faith that you have never eludes Him. His power resides inside it. *Even a tiny faith holds all of Christ. He grabs a hold of that particle and makes something beautiful. He remains faithful despite our unfaithfulness. Today I look over at my sweetheart. There is no logical explanation for the fact that he has zero pain. Except God. Time and time again He has shown me~ Keep looking for your answer, even when your faith seems small because~ He is faithful. When we are looking for the worst, He is creating our miracles. I was upstairs brushing my teeth when I heard it. My husband was still downstairs, and as he left the den he said~ ”Alexa, turn off the lights please.” “PLEASE!?” He said “please” to Alexa. 😂 In case you aren’t aware, (according to Google) Alexa is a ‘virtual assistant technology smart speaker.’ My rough and tough husband said please to a little, non human speaker. (I love him so much 🥰) I started laughing so hard that I had to sit down. I wasn’t sure he even realized he said it, so I didn’t bring it up. The next night as we were both heading upstairs, he again asked Alexa to turn off the lights. I stopped and looked at him~ and I knew he knew. He was trying to hide the smirk on his face. He innocently asked “what??” Trying not to laugh I responded “you forgot to say please.” And we both burst out laughing. The whole Alexa incident got me thinking about our lives and all the technology and answers that are right at our fingertips. You can Google anything nowadays and get an answer in minutes. As long as it is plugged in, I can ask Alexa a question and get an immediate response. Somehow this need for immediate results has crept over into our spiritual lives. We want answers from God right NOW. Technology has wonderful benefits, but when it comes to the way we think and perceive life, it can have its downfalls. The news is constantly bombarding us with the horror this world throws at us~ all within minutes of when it happened. We fear. We self diagnose. We binge watch. We covet. We buy more. We fear more. We get depressed. We worry. Mental health has spiraled downward. And then we end up questioning God’s love for us. My daughter and I were having this conversation a few weeks back. She made the comment that she didn’t think God ever intended for us to have this much information at our fingertips 24/7. I remember responding that ‘back in the day, all a woman had to think about was taking care of her family and Jesus. Eyes and heart always on the Lord, because nothing else was around to take His place’. It’s time for us to get back to loving God. A tender, fervent, personal love. Get back to digging deep into His word. Get back to seeking Him with our whole heart. Get back to giving our families to Jesus and raising them to love Him with their everything. Get back to talking to Him continually. Asking Him for the answers. Trusting Him for the outcomes. Being still in His presence and having faith in His unbelievable love for us. A love that is ALWAYS for us and NEVER against us. A love that can’t be measured or bought. A love freely given because of His Son. (John 15:10, Romans 8:31-39, Ephesians 2:8-9, 3:18) We are too wrapped up in today. (Revelation 2:4) ‘Loving God with our everything’ has become a passing Christian phrase with no real meaning. And because our love has waned, our laughter has been lost. We often treat God like He’s Alexa, and quite often we don’t even say please. We have forgotten that the joy of the Lord is our strength and in His presence is fullness of joy. (Nehemiah 8:10, Psalm 16:11) Today I want to encourage you to take a sabbatical from technology. From our phones and laptops and kindles. From the 24 hour news. From binge watching. From Amazon and Google. From Alexa. This summer focus on being still in His presence and growing in our love for our Savior. When we are plugged into His power, He will give us all the answers we need. We will find rest in His presence, comfort and peace. And our laughter will return. When I think about that night my husband spoke to Alexa, I smile when I recall his words but I laugh when I remember the laughter we shared together. When I look back on my life I don’t want to remember all the bad. I want to remember my soul being filled with laughter. My greatest happiness being loved by my Savior. A life completely filled up with the joy of the Lord. (1 Peter 1:8) Long summer days await us my friend. Feed your soul. Fill those days with the love of God and with laughter. (Psalm 16:8-9, 11, 89:15-17, 94:19, 126:2-3, Romans 5:5, 8:38-39, Ephesians 3:16-19, Philippians 4:4, ) |
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