© 2020 HOLDING HOPE
I looked over at Mike as we drove in silence and my heart just filled with love. Sometimes when I think about how much I love him it brings tears to my eyes. He's my best friend. Yes, there are times that he drives me completely crazy and I want to kill him but honestly, I can't imagine life without him. I am closer to him than any other person on this earth. He knows everything about me, the good and the bad, and loves me still. We share everything. So, holding hands, we drove in silence, and I thought of what a comfort it was to just be still in the silence with him.
By now I'm sure you all know that I can tend to over think things. One area that's always been a source of overthinking is prayer. I've read so many books and heard so many pastors preach on the subject that honestly, it can seem a bit overwhelming, even to someone who has been in church their whole life. We're talking about talking to God here! That's huge! Even though it should be such a simple thing~ talking to our Father, I would still struggle. Am I praying long enough? Am I supposed to praise and thank Him first or ask for forgiveness first? Am I forgetting someone I'm supposed to be praying for? Is it stupid to ask God to help me with this? And so on. I've had many questions pop up through the years but that day, as I sat in the silence with the one person I loved the most on this earth~ my Heavenly Father answered them all.
Mike and I don't 'make' ourselves sit for a designated amount of time each day talking, it just comes naturally. It's not a chore. It's a desire. We talk to each other all throughout the day. And if we have wronged one another~that fellowship is broken and needs to be restored by telling each other we are sorry. And then there are times where we don't talk at all. We are just still in the comfort of each other's presence. This is how it is meant to be with Jesus. Talking to Him all throughout our day, apologizing when we know we have wronged Him, taking comfort in just being still in His presence. It doesn't have to be complicated. It doesn't have to be specific words or phrases, just sharing our heart with the One Who loves us more than we can imagine. When I think about how much I love Mike, I can't even fathom how much my Savior loves me. I fall on my knees in awe. How could I, in turn, not love Him with my everything?
And so, I will talk to Him all day. I will laugh about silly things with Him, that I'm sure only He and I understand. When I feel alone, He will hold my hand. I will cry with Him. I will apologize when I've done something stupid. I will share my stories and dreams and ask His advice. I will talk to Him about my children and grandchildren and friends and loved ones. I will sing songs to Him with a voice that only He could love. I will thank Him for this beautiful life He has blessed me with and I will sit in the silence of His comfort and~ Be Still.