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12/9/2022 Comments

He's No Longer The Strong Man I Lean On, When I Really Need To Lean On Him

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​Today I’m inviting you to my wedding. I’m sharing a video my son made for us 7 years ago for our 30th anniversary…

When you’re young and you fall in love, quite often you don’t think too far ahead. You’re living in the moment. Maybe you talk about children or future plans, but the farthest you get in your thought process is the dream of getting old together, sitting on a porch with a white picket fence and smiling at the wonderful life God allowed you. 

Lately, I have continually heard the question~ “How did you know he was the one?” It seems to be a recurring theme on sappy Christmas movies. I pondered that as I thought back. It occurred to me the other day that I actually had that vision of Mike and I when I first got married, the whole “growing old, white picket fence” thing.  I never saw that future with anyone else. 

A future where I couldn’t live without him. 

When I was 20, I never dreamed that someday my crazy, active young man (who could face any challenge and do any thing) would have three major joints replaced within 5 months time. His shoulder, right knee and next week, his left knee. 

When we’re young, we don’t like to think about the “what if’s” of our futures. What if my husband gets dementia? What if my husband gets cancer? What if he has heart problems or lung problems? 

What if he is no longer the strong man I lean on, when I really need to lean on him? 

My husband is my best friend. He’s the love of my life, but I’ll be honest~ there have been times I’ve lost my patience with him. I’ve lost the spark. I’ve misplaced my dreams, the very dreams that we actually got to live out together. 

I remember that childish girl who promised her forever to the man of those dreams. Our anniversary is this week and I remember my “for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health.” I meant every word as he held my hands in front of 500 people 37 years ago.

Truth be told~ I’m sure he didn’t think he signed up for a wife with all my issues either,  but he loves me despite me. 

This “outward” that we grow old with isn’t truly us, it’s just our physical bodies aging through the process of time. Our true self lies deep within. It is our souls. They never grow old. I fell in love with Mike’s soul 37 years ago.  

Today I want to encourage you to remember that soul you fell in love with. The soul God placed in your hands to love and cherish. Some days it’s a lot harder to do, but those are the days we need to remind ourselves that our husbands have hard days dealing with us as well. 

You hold his soul in the heart of your actions, your words, your respect, your passion, your touch, your empathy, your patience your tenderness~
and most importantly~
your love. 

Remember that young girl who couldn’t imagine a future without him. 

Whatever you face in the days ahead, whatever reality has squashed the dreams of that naive young bride you once were, don’t let go of that promise to love. No matter what. 

I wrote the words to that song we’re singing at our wedding. Mike came up with the tune. I cannot believe shy Charisse even attempted to sing it. That’s what love  does to you, makes you believe you can do anything. 

With all your heart, with all your soul~
Make each other believe again this Christmas. 

Scripture Reading:
I Corinthians 13:1-8, 16:14
I John 4:7-8
I Timothy 5:8
Romans 12:9-10
John 15:11-12
Hebrews 10:24
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