“I’m such a type A personality.”
Have you ever heard a comment like this? What about the new wave of personality tests or Enneagram numbers? It seems like they’re popping up everywhere. What really amazes me is how completely different we all are.
Not just a little different, but majorly different.
I so often see it in my grandchildren. Each of my grandsons have different personalities, and my granddaughters seem to be completely opposite. One is wild, crazy and outgoing and the other is shy, quiet and sweet.
My wild and crazy girl likes to put up a strong front. She’s been that way since she was a baby. She doesn’t like to show her vulnerability at all. She will just start to let her guard down and the minute I grab her to hug her, she will push away and act silly. So, you can imagine how I eat it up when on rare occasions she wants to snuggle and cuddles up next to me. I just sit quietly stroking her hair and drinking it all in. Sometimes she will slip her tiny hand into mine and sit with me that way without saying a word.
It got me thinking about a comment my friend said to me about my blog. She mentioned how very different our personalities were, but that she enjoyed reading my blog and seeing things from a different perspective.
I’m not like my granddaughter.
“grab hold of that hand and don’t let go, passionate snuggler, cuddler, crier, emotional, deep loving and deep thinking, shy introvert, ‘please let me help you, encourage you and lift you up’, I need to fix everything and make everyone happy” personality.
Not sure what letter of the alphabet that type is or what Enneagram number I am, but that’s me.
Because of the deep desire I have to want to help EVERYONE, writing for my blog can sometimes be tough. I have this need to somehow make myself relatable to other women, no matter how our personalities might differ.
As I thought about this, it reminded me of an incident that happened the other night. A problem arose between two of my children and I honestly did not have a clue how to help or what to say. My immediate thought was to ask my logical husband for help, except this time I couldn’t. He had just boarded a plane and would be in the air for at least two hours. A bit of panic mode set in. I wanted to fix the situation. I wanted my husband to come to my rescue. To help me. To make everything better and I wanted to go to bed that night knowing it was all wrapped up in a perfect little “everything’s alright.” package. I wanted a hero.
I think that no matter what type personality or Enneagram number you are, each of us as women have that need deep down. (Whether we want to admit it or not). The need to be taken care of. The need for a rescuer. A hero. The desire for everything to be ok. And I truly believe God put that need in each of us for a reason.
I think about the moments my tough little Clara becomes vulnerable and the little bit of peace that comes over her when her hand slips into mine, and I think about the emotional basket case I can be at times and the small measure of comfort I get when my hand rests in my husband’s strong one. But it’s not a lasting peace. It’s not a comfort that reaches down deep to your very core.
Something is always missing.
And then I think about Jesus.
Jesus needed time with His Father and I realized that’s exactly why God places that need in each of us.
(Matthew 14:23, Luke 5:16, Mark 1:35)
He wants all of us to be like Jesus.
(Isaiah 30:15, Philippians 2:5)
It’s not a need that any human can meet. It’s a need deep down that only God can fulfill. It’s a comfort and a peace that can never be attained from another human being.
(John 14:27, 16:33, Philippians 4:6-7)
It’s a peace that you alone cannot attain, no matter how strong your personality is.
He alone is our rescuer. He alone can make everything ok. All we need do is trust. Trust Him, go to Him, slip our tiny hand inside the very hands that created our entire world and rest there.
(Isaiah 26:3, 48:13)
Allow Him to take care of us. (I Peter 5:7)
To be our hero.
So what happened in my situation? I prayed. I sought God. I asked for wisdom. And even though my husband wasn’t sitting next to me on the couch, I wasn’t alone. A peace and comfort washed over me in a situation I thought had no possible, promising outcome.
And I realized my hand was being held by my hero.
Deuteronomy 20:4, Isaiah 41:10, 13-14