I Will Always Be Mom

I WILL ALWAYS BE MOM
It’s so easy when they’re little.
They look up at you with wide eyes,
and soak up every word. They believe you.
You’re mom, so your words to them must be true.

“You’re so beautiful.”
You’re such a big boy.”
“Hold on to my hand when we cross the street.”
“Don’t talk to strangers.”
“You’re doing great.”

But then~
Things change. It gets harder.
You can see it in their little eyes.
Trusting innocence is missing and it squeezes your heart.

“Don’t listen to what those kids are saying about you.
You are beautiful. You are strong.
“Don’t let go of my hand around your friends. Don’t be embarrassed to hug me one more time...”

And your heart says~
“Not yet. I’m not ready.
You’re still my little one~
No matter how old you get, I will always hold your hand. I will never let go. I will always be here. I will always be mom.”

And then~
It gets even harder.
Their eyes roll as you speak.
It hurts, but you pretend that it doesn’t as you scold.

“Don’t hang around with that crowd.”
“Don’t let go of God’s hand.”
“Don’t fall for that person.
They don’t love you.
They don’t treat you right~
God has so much more for you.”

And then~
Their eyes sparkle with happiness. You breathe that sigh of relief.
When God worked on their hearts and held their hands.
When God brought a spouse that loved them with the love you prayed for all along. When you thought the “don’t’s” were behind you~
you find yourself being a mom still.
Because that’s what moms do.

They protect. They pray over.
They worry and they warn.
Because they’ve lived it. They’ve seen things that cause happiness and hope.
Joy and forgiveness. Comfort and love.
But they’ve also seen heartache.
Things that cause pain.
Things that tear you away from your spouse. Away from God.

You speak your heart. Inside it screams~ please listen to me.
They say “thank’s mom”,
but their eyes say~
“mom can be so dramatic about things .”
They say “I know mom”,
but their eyes say~
“mom worries about way too much.”

And deep inside, your heart whispers~
”No matter how old you get, I will always hold your hand. I will never let go. I will always be mom. “

And then the day comes that their eyes are looking into the little eyes of their own children, the eyes that soak up every word. The little eyes that don’t trust.
The eyes that roll when they speak.

And your child looks your way.
Their eyes catch yours and they say,
“I understand mom.”
Their eyes say “thank you.”
And their eyes soak up everything you say again, because they’ve been there. They’ve seen the things that cause heartache and pain, and they don’t want their little ones to go through those same things.

They’ve also seen the things that bring happiness and hope.
Joy and forgiveness. Comfort and love.

And with a smile, they lean in and whisper to their little one~
“I will always hold your hand. I will never let go. I will always be mom.”